Dating thread 184! Where we don't take any nonsense !

[bangheadhere40]

The Rules: 1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating. 2. Develop a thick skin. 3. Do not invest emotionally too soon. 4. It's all BS until it actually happens. 5. Trust your gut instinct. 6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault. 7. Know your worth. 8. If it's not fun, stop. 9. Loo update is mandatory. 10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy. Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps click here ** Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@stuck that's good...he is keen to make a good impression and not just get you into bed and us being respectful. If you want physical you will have to take the lead.

He sounds very nice btw!

He is lovely, I’ve decided he looks just like dermott o Leary just shorter! I think now we’ve both admitted we really wanted to kiss each other we’ll be ok!!

@bangheadhere40 I have a good feeling about Mr Dumfries

@Stuckinarut79 at least you are both on the same page! When are you seeing him again?

I had another lovely date with Mr Joiner.

@misty9 aw well done lovely. I know it's hard to walk away from something when that bloody connection keeps you feeling hooked. But you are worth so much more.

@stuckinarut gah. It would frustrate me no end if I had to be the one to bring it up. But at least it's out in the open. I had one date, years ago, who didn't kiss me until date 5. Annoyingly he had a micro penis!! He got married after though so clearly didn't put everyone off. Good luck on date 5!

Haven’t posted for a while as things have been quiet. Next week is looking busy, I have a few irons but all of them have amber flags (don’t really fit my criteria).

Mr Skate - meant to be meeting him Sunday but he has 2 very young kids and I’m not really keen on dating someone with little ones as mine are now teens and I kind of feel my children days are almost over.

Mr Ski- he’s the guy who seems to be loaded and a bit posh, he’s into dancing and works away a lot, not really sure he’s my type and he’s at the end of my age range (49), meeting him Tuesday for a coffee.

Mr Snake - this is the one I have met, if anyone remembers, I went to his house to deliver something and met his kids, he then vanished but seems to have returned and seems very keen (possibly just after a shag but seems to be planning trips away with me), he doesn’t have a car at the moment and live a hour away so not ideal.

Mr Offgrid - the scruffy guy I met a month or so ago, we still talk but haven’t got around to meeting, I feel comfortable with him and we talk about things I wouldn’t talk to other about, only down side is he’s scruffy and hardly ever available due to work, though I think if I put more effort in he would too.

There are a couple others but none are really pulling me in. Maybe I’m too fussy 🤣

I will probably go on the date with Mr ski as a practice as it’s been a while since I had a date. He’s seems funny but not really my type.

@dancemom not till next Wednesday, he’s busy over the weekend, and Wednesday is my one free night in the week usually.

@Notcoolmum it is annoying and is a bit of an amber flag for me, I had a similar situation with my stbxh (which went on much longer) which was why I was determined I had to do/say something, but I know there’s part of me that’s frustrated I yet again had to be the one to bring it up and move things along.

@dancemom not till next Wednesday, he’s busy over the weekend, and Wednesday is my one free night in the week usually.

@Notcoolmum it is annoying and is a bit of an amber flag for me, I had a similar situation with my stbxh (which went on much longer) which was why I was determined I had to do/say something, but I know there’s part of me that’s frustrated I yet again had to be the one to bring it up and move things along.

Hello all.
I just spent Tues afternoon to last night at Mr Ps for dates 6 and 7 lol and it was lovely! I really like him.
His teeth were still really sore but we decided we still really wanted to see each other so I did some juggling.

I'm worried about how I'm feeling though. I've come home feeling really anxious. I can't relax into this at all and I worry I'm going to scare him off or he'll go off me?
I feel SO insecure, its almost like hes too lovely after my ex.
He drove me home and he texted to say thanks for coming and suggested a date next week as he has his kids now
I replied and told him how much I liked him and he said thanks for telling me, I wasn't sure how you were feeling as you were so pensive this evening.
So now I'm stressing over why I was so quiet when we were chilling together. Because I was! I wasnt myself at all !
Can someone please come and tell me to calm down I feel ridiculous!!!!!

Hello all.
I just spent Tues afternoon to last night at Mr Ps for dates 6 and 7 lol and it was lovely! I really like him.
His teeth were still really sore but we decided we still really wanted to see each other so I did some juggling.

I'm worried about how I'm feeling though. I've come home feeling really anxious. I can't relax into this at all and I worry I'm going to scare him off or he'll go off me?
I feel SO insecure, its almost like hes too lovely after my ex.
He drove me home and he texted to say thanks for coming and suggested a date next week as he has his kids now
I replied and told him how much I liked him and he said thanks for telling me, I wasn't sure how you were feeling as you were so pensive this evening.
So now I'm stressing over my behaviour!!!!
Can someone please come and tell me to calm down I feel ridiculous!!!!!

@dancemom not till next Wednesday, he’s busy over the weekend, and Wednesday is my one free night in the week usually.

@Notcoolmum it is annoying and is a bit of an amber flag for me, I had a similar situation with my stbxh (which went on much longer) which was why I was determined I had to do/say something, but I know there’s part of me that’s frustrated I yet again had to be the one to bring it up and move things along.

Sorry site was being glitchy and not refreshing!

@Clovertoast it's the sex haze hormones. Totally natural. They will die down in a day or 2. How do you feel about things with his ex wife now?

@Stuckinarut79 other than micro penis man I only had one man I fancied on a date who didn't kiss me. And he then ghosted me so clearly didn't feel it. Having 4 dates and no kiss would do my head in! Do you think your body language is very closed?! Or you like shy men?! 🤷🏻‍♀️😂

So I messaged the man I like (who I’m struggling to think of a name for!) last night on Twitter. Plan was to say “Hey, hows your week been?” And then once he replied ask if he wanted to go for a drink. But he hasn’t replied. And the message isn’t even showing as being seen. Even though I can see he is active on Twitter now! I hate modern technology. I know it’s entirely possible he is just flicking through Twitter but not reading messages, or that he has seen it and is waiting till he has more time to reply, or not wanting to seem too keen .. but my insecure side is thinking “Oh God, I’ve completely misread the situation and he’s seen the DM in his emails but not opened it because he’s embarrassed and trying to think how to let me down gently.” Even though when we last met, he said “Let me know when you’re free and we should have another coffee.” Ok, that’s is- he’s now called Mr Coffee!

@Treesinthewind not always a popular opinion on here but experience has taught me not to chase a man. If they like you they will make it known. However he had messaged you on Twitter so there is. I reason to assume he'd be dreading opening a message from you. He may get lots of spam DMs so rarely check messaged etc. I wouldn't push again now though. You have followed suit with him and messaged him the way he did you. Ball is firmly in his court now.

There is no reason... wish you could edit posts!

Thanks @Notcoolmum I'm trying to be all cool and not look too bloody desperate. We normally do a good morning text but he hasn't today and I told myself I wouldn't unless he did but I just have ! Ahhhhhh.
His ex wife is still mentioned a lot. He told me at least 3 times over the 2 days I was there how grateful he was to her for stepping in to help him and and how great she had been.

Thanks @Notcoolmum 😊 Yep, totally agree that I don’t want to chase. I have no other irons and am not online dating etc so it’s only because we’ve met organically that I’m even interested.

Have left it almost two weeks since we last met. My concern had been that he didn’t want to push things in case I was only interested in him professionally, so my thinking is that now I have initiated contact again in an informal way, that shows I am personally interested and it’s definitely up to him now! Just need to stay calm and stop checking for messages now! X

@Treesinthewind, I can totally identify with what you are feeling but I think you are going to have to try to put it out of your mind and then be pleasantly surprised when he hopefully gets back to you. We all know that if someone is interested they will make contact, particularly since you have reached out to him. Try a dabble with OLD, it may provide a pleasant distraction.

Update on irons. Mr Photography has been trying to get me to go to his every evening this week. Not sure if he's a bit lonely or enjoying the sex. I have been busy so not able to go. Due to see him this evening though.
Coffee date with Mr Local was very pleasant and he was happy to tell me how much he liked what he saw. Which was lovely to hear. Not a real prospect for a relationship but someone I would happily see again.
Not really using Tinder.Juggling the chats can be time consuming and tedious.

Disappointed as after 2 weeks of daily messaging and staying over at the weekend Mr Repeat appears to have ghosted.

I haven't heard from him since Sunday night. He sent some nice messages after we spent the night together and said he wanted to do it again but then nothing. He sent a message Sun night, I replied Mon lunchtime and he's not even read it. It's been delivered but he's not opened it.

I can't pretend I don't feel a bit shit, he'd been so nice and obviously we did have history so he wasn't a stranger and it's just such a crap way to behave.

A few other irons but I think I need to lick my wounds first.

Oh @clovertoast how do you feel about that? Do you get the impression it was a one off due to circumstances or that actually he still sees her as his go to in an emergency?

Was that after sex @pomegranatefizz? Good advice I've had on here is to delete chat and his number so you can't contact them.

@pomegranatefizz that's bad behaviour, yet seems to be common.....yes, delete his number so you can't contact him is good advice.

I never know if we just expect more post sex and things haven't really changed, or if they do drop the comms deliberately.

@Stuckinarut79 don't write off the no kissing iron yet. I'm really shy, still technically married and not into PDA at all. I didn't kiss MrN for 5 dates, but then at home date #6 was sex all night and the following morning 😳☺️ I made it clear before we had an at home date that I wanted it to be all night, not just dinner. That was 5 months ago, and although I'm still quite casual about where things are going we still date regularly.