Dating thread 184! Where we don't take any nonsense !

[bangheadhere40]

The Rules: 1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating. 2. Develop a thick skin. 3. Do not invest emotionally too soon. 4. It's all BS until it actually happens. 5. Trust your gut instinct. 6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault. 7. Know your worth. 8. If it's not fun, stop. 9. Loo update is mandatory. 10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future 14. OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy. Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps click here ** Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

Loving the teeth chat haha! Bad teeth are really off putting for me but I say that as someone who went through 8 years of braces and teeth removal to get mine to look good. I'm actually slightly concerned that with the current trend for them to be so bright white though! It's scary!

I was chatting to a guy on tinder earlier, so far so normal and then I happened to mention that I have a thing for red heads, which he is. He said great I hope I can fulfil you and your fantasies. I couldn't stop laughing, I don't know why but it's not a fantasy is it, it's just liking the hair colour. Wasn't sure where to go with that!

Still on the lighter note, what are your best ideas for second dates? I have just had a lovely evening in a pub with somebody I met through online dating and we have arranged to meet again next week.

I’m thinking... maybe something a bit more fun, but still with an opportunity to chat? Theatre / cinema seems a bit serious but I would quite like to do something that we can enjoy together (no innuendo intended!). Or should we just do another drink?

We have had a little kiss, but I want to take things fairly slowly!

@purple how about a walk and some food after? Or a comedy night would be fun!

@bangheadhere40 you didn’t message him back did you 😬

I just put all good ta 👍 @jane.

To be honest I'm not bothered at all, and I ignore most of the messages. I don't want to give him the satisfaction of blocking, or even ignoring as it would appear I was bothered, so just aloof is fine.

It's also reminding me what shitty behaviour is and not to accept it again, and is weirdly amusing now.

@uttefsocks I'd be tempted to message and say u thought he'd stopped dating

Oh @crazycatlady20 what's the point, I clearly repel men but in a way that compels them to give every impression of really liking me first before abruptly ghosting me just to fuck with me a little. I'm actually not awful according to my friends.

@SimonJT that makes sense. Eye contact is also very cultural - my ex struggled to make eye contact and I learned that culturally for him you lower your eyes to defer to someone and meet their eyes to defy them. It took me years to adjust to that!

@bangheadhere40 so good to hear your now able to laugh at Mr not straight, listening to mr fallback he’s such a classic, “throw her a crumb”! Glad you can now see it!

I made myself laugh yesterday, I was chatting with a potential iron on what’s app, he suddenly asked what I liked with regard to sex, I sent a polite that’s not appropriate reply to which I got “thought I’d switch it up from, hows your day” so I sent a list of topics that he could have asked about that where more appropriate!

Happy Valentine’s Day everyone 😘. Hope everyone with dates today has a great time. I have a date with dd and friends.

I now seem to be on my own tonight

Mr BC forgot an entire conversation we had about tonight until I mentioned it on Wednesday, by which time the cinema was fully booked. Then he has to go home tonight for the animals as SDC won't be there to feed them. He suggested a couple of hours and a Deliveroo at mine but that feels like a booty call so I've said no. Feel really disappointed (and a bit like SDC did that deliberately - doesn't like him seeing me).

Date with my dog for Valentines tonight, she is delightful company and doesn’t hog the remote or the gin! Have just waved Mr GN off though so Valentines is not a complete washout for the first time in years 😊.

batshit how can it be a booty call after a year together? Seems a shame to miss out completely.

I'm also out with a friend tonight Jane, have fun 🙂

@Bashit,not surprised you feel let down, so would I, especially today. I think you did the right thing telling him not to bother, although I don't know the full back story of Mr BC, is it a one off?

As in, has he forgot plans before? If not, maybe let him off this time.

I'm going out with friends tonight, looking forward to it!

@BatshitCrazyWoman I think you did the right thing. You deserve more forward planning than that.

Tiger because he'll get to mine at 7.30 ish, won't be hungry 'yet' so we'll end up in bed and he'll get up and leave at 9.30. It's happened before. It makes me feel really shit. I also won't be able to sleep once he's gone and I have an early start tomorrow.

@BatshitCrazyWoman imho you did the right thing to say no. You aren't a booty call. And maybe as he sits alone in his shrine to his wife he can start to see how lovely it would be if you felt comfortable enough to come to his.

I'm already fed up with Valentine's Day. We had agreed to celebrate next weekend due to childcare and other plans. But I didn't realise this meant not getting a card today. Which has upset me more than is probably reasonable.

@BatshitCrazyWoman would you not just chat and have a brew then eat ?

All good reasons bstshit I’m sorry it’s gone tits up. Can you do a Galentines instead?

@notcool are you sure no card? It's still very early in the day, just to play devils advocate.

It's not just the not remembering because that's just human - it's the coming over for a couple of hours. I just don't like how it makes me feel.

Jane no that's not how it ended up in the past.

There will be no @bangheadhere40 because I made a 'deal' out of it. But it's kind of taken the shine off anyway.

Glad you can laugh at mr straight already. That's huge progress. 👏