Dating thread 182 - keeping our irons warm by the fireplace

[saltysally]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

undecided dont message again. You've given a time, the ball is in his court, delete his conversation and phone number to avoid checking. Unmatch him if you have to. When we're all lying on our death beds counting up how much precious time we wasted looking to see if someone is ignoring us while being online....well they will make for sad stats. Save yourself

salty yeah he was over involved, over familiar, I felt invaded. He backed off when I told him but I think ita just hos way and he cant help it. It's a shame, there was much about him i liked. Anyway I'm glad you and mr music are kink aligned! Have you met him yet i cant rem

@Stuckinarut79 if you go to the ‘discover’ bit (bottom left of app) then go through your ‘100 top picks’ or ‘daily picks’ or something like that then you can go through & see what they’d see (if that makes sense).
It usually means they’ve just swiped, not looked...
Also, if someone has ‘liked’ you or you them, and you swipe left on discover then it ‘un likes’ them, there’s no other way to get rid of a like.
If someone who likes you views your profile then it shows as a view, and you know they’re just looking at your profile again (and again and again in some cases)
Hope that makes some kind of sense!
@supercali thank you- my head needed a wobble

Sorry gang I had to go pick up the kids. It was just all bloody lovely. Walking around holding hands, took me for dinner. He reckons he is in. It’s going to be hard for us to carve enough matching time out but we both want to try. Off the apps and exclusive. I guess time will tell if he can actually give me the emotion I need and open up. When I’m with him it’s like all is right in the world!

Just read the thread. Love you guys! I gave notifications off 😂

@marls lovely update, so not staying over worked? Fingers crossed for you.

Aw marlbs. That's made me all glowy and smiley. Walking about holding hands. 🥰 No more swinging clubs together then... that's a bit of a shame.

Crikey I'm definitely getting my mojo back

Omg both you and @tigerdater going all loved up with FWB. That's my dream.. although I'd have to get one for that to happen

@aufaitaccompli I'm like you I've set my bar high this time around and as a result barely date! I'm mid forties my body isn't bad for my age but I've never been much of a gym goer let's put it that way! I'm three and a half years single this time around. I've never read the rules my dating guru is GL Lambert I don't know if you've read any of his books or blog posts. He is so on the money with his insights into the male mind and how men really think about women, sex and relationships. I've had two live in LTRs and looking back the first was about wanting to get married , the second was about wanting someone to bring up children with, but both were controling men who had their own reasons for wanting to be with me but neither of them were with me because they loved the bones of me and this time around that's all I want and I'm not willing to settle for less. We don't have to get married , we don't have to live together, I just want someone to love who loves me . I've met one man who could be he but I'm not 100% sure yet. Interesting to read that Pamela Anderson has just married a man who's been after her for 35 years and Nicole sherzinger is dating someone who's been after her for 6 years ! Love happens in its own sweet time doesn't it , it's like it says in the song , 'you can't hurry love' !

Excellent news @marlbs Very pleased for you.

@supercali77 no we've not met yet. Just had two 3+ hr calls about every and anything. I know I am overinvested and it's still possible we won't have chemistry in real life. We are both aware of that but also both amazed how much our lives have lined up. Both trying to not get excited which is hard when it all seems just so darn perfect it There are no red flags at all.

Such lovely news, @Marlboroandmalbec34! Happy for you!

I'm heading home after seeing Mr G. The way that man looks at me sometimes.. 😍

salty huzzah! How amazing. I'm excited for you. Come on pheromones!

marlbs yay! Let's hope it all works out. You're giving it a shot and having a lovely time

undecided that was bloody rude of him! He sounds like a trophy hunter - a guy who just wants to get a woman to agree to a date, then disappears. Notches on the coffee cup or something. Utterly, utterly pathetic but sadly quite common in my experience.

dancemom it sounds like things are going well with Mr Joiner - where are you at with him?

marlbs lovely update!

Hope you have room on that smitten bench @perfectpretender

@supercali77 thank you. We are committing to a monastery and convent if this doesn't work. He's also just paid £200+ for a night of an event I'm attending in April too that he now likes. The signs are as good as they can be.

Right, I need to get back to reality. Be back later

Yay 🎉🎉🎉 Marls so happy for you 😃

Sounds like it's going well dancemom.

Have been mooching in town with Mr BC who was patiently waiting for me to return half the stuff I bought last week 😂😂

It sounds like love is in the air on the dating thread! congrats to everyone who's moving things forward with their iron I've had a couple of days without any male attention , not counting likes on match. Mr Yorkshireman has gone quiet on me since Thursday evening, I'm starting to suspect he wasn't as genuine as he first appeared but he's still got till the weekend to name a time and a place for our supposed date so we'll see. Mr pep saw me bent over on Thursday and gave me the filthiest look this is how we amuse ourselves at work but since coming back after Christmas we haven't had a proper conversation yet just been saying hi to each other when we pass each other in the corridor

@TigerDater he's lovely!

I'm quite uptight when it comes to dating after being very hurt before but he's just so laid back it's having a positive effect on me.
We haven't actually DTD yet and there's been no pressure from him at all, he's said he's enjoying the build up, tells me I'm beautiful, calls me gorgeous in texts ... is that the smitten bench I see in the distance??

@Marlboroandmalbec34 lovely update, I really hope this works out for you both

@saltysally Sounds very promising!

@Stillsexystillsingle GL Lambert book bought!

Things move so fast around here, felt like yesterday it was all doom and gloom now everyone’s lived up heartening to see.

I’ve two dates this week Mr scenery rearranged for Wednesday night, it feels like OLD should be done, we chat a bit in the evening, we’ve covered common ground now it’s a wait and see how it is in person, it feels safe meeting with no expectations.

Saturday I’m meeting mr taichi, I’m worried he’s way over invested he asked me yesterday how I saw a relationship fitting into my family life, my big worry with him is I think he’s in live with the idea of being in a relationship, and I’m just the nice girl who’s talking to him. We’ve been messaging all day for a few weeks and a few telephone chats, he’s lovely but I don’t feel there’s a spark, I’ve told him I’m expecting us to be friends but I don’t think at this point we’ll be more, I’m trying to manage his expectations!!

I also started talking to someone on match the other night, he’s very local, his profile emphasis he’s very shy but somehow we’ve discussed how much we miss sex! I think theirs potential for a fwb there but I’m not sure how I really feel about that, I’ve a history of getting the feels! But I also worry if he’s that shy he’s not going to do my confidence any good, I can’t and won’t do all the chasing! Not sure he’s worthy of a name yet I’ll see how it goes in the next few days, he did ask for my number which I gave him but then kept chatting on the app! Weird!

Which one @Stuckinarut79? 'men don't love women like you' is my favourite

@Stillsexy yep that one, now can’t download it as I’m sat with no wifi!!