Masturbation (shhhh). Does everyone do it?

[FunAndFrolics]

I have to ask. I am interested. I always thought everyone did it (I do).
I have been with dh for 10 years and am still not convinced he does. It is the only topic that we have never discussed. I am sure (ok, I know) that he doesn't think I do!
Does he?
Do you?
(It was a PART of my previous relationship, but with dh it has never 'cropped up')

excellent flum, exactly like mine then
phew
its nice to be able to call them a tosser though after all tis factually correct

hmb - my dh says the same. He says he's never met a man that doesn't masturbate and doesn't like porn...but then I suppose some might say they do just because of peer pressure??

The thing is though, we are just animals at the end of the day and it's just part of what we are so I'd think it fairly safe to say that the majority do although people have different hormone levels, libidos etc so I guess there must be some who don't.

reallyembarrassedbut - now you're teasing us! Come on, don't keep opinions like that as a private activity, there's nothihg to be ashamed of, you know

erm, well, when i was in a sexual relationship, i did it more, and now i'm not, i don't so much - and when i do it's sort of furtive and a bit embarrassing and depressing

Ahh REB, thats rotten. You should go find a nice girl to spend a bit of time with, as on the other fred, where I said the same.

Its not fair, people need to feel desired/needed/wanted, its our bread and butter. You don't need to bail out of your marriage as you might get through this. But a little bit on the side will probably make you feel a bit better.

Is encouraging an affair the best advice, really ? I agree that sex/love and affection are a basic human right, but just not sure that going outside of your relationship without your partners consent or knowledge is the best advice.

backs quietly out of thread, zipping mouth shut on way

That's v interesting though - that men might mb more when linked to feelings of desire within their relationship - a timely reminder for people who feel a bit offended or alienated if their DP does it.

reallyembarrassedbut, please don't take my post as a personal affront. I was merely expressing my opinion, which I am entitled to do, as are you. Don't feel that you have to slink off because I disagree with a morsel of advice offered on a thread.

no offence taken manc, i'm a bit flabberghasted at the suggestion too - just have a feeling i should be working, not causing trouble, albeit unintentionally, here

You aren't causing trouble !

I just think that an affiar (ie sex outside your marriage/relationship without your partner's consent) will not solve anything. Yes you'll banish the horn for a few days/months but the underlying sexual dysfunction within your marriage will still be there. If you want to remain in a healthy relationship with your DW then you both need to take serious steps to resolve your sexual problems and work from there. Sex outside the relationship will only widen the gap further, IMHO.

Sorry to veer off subject

I suggested the affair not him!!

I don't think theres anything wrong with that suggestion. Desperate times need desperate measures.

And the modern attitude to marraige is a little bit precious. We all think it is perfect to sleep with only one person for 50 - 60 years.

Even going back only one generation, affairs were common, accepted but rarely discussed.

In the modern day, marraiges potentially last so long as we all live so much longer that it really is difficult.

I know you did, hence my original response being directly after your post, Flum . I was talking to REB afterwards because he scuttled off and I wanted to be sure that he didn't get the wrong end of the stick.

an affair may not be the right thing to do, but in reb's position, i wouldn't blame him if he did tbh, from what i have read.

can someone brief me on this thread please,
yes I am too lazy to do it myself
thank you

Indeed, I'm not sure that anyone would blame him either, but I think it would only serve to compound the problems within his relationship in the long run. FWIW, I think REB has an immense level of patience and commitment.

P.S. I wank. To answer the original question

No, got any brownies going spare?

WEll ok: Do you w*nk? Does your partner? Then for an update just lead the last 10 messages, as its swerved off the road a bit.

or I suppose it could be wonk in your case

or wink.....

if you are too lazy to do it yourself do you get dh to do it for you wong?

no
yes
yes

SPRAY!

suzy

Flum are you suggesting that it is boring to sleep with the same person for 50 - 60 years? that doesnt horrify me tbh

Your sex life is only limited by your imagination.... and possibly flexibility

No its nice if you still really love them and every thing is cosy and lovely in paradise. My Grandparents were like that (they said).

But if paradise is a bit rocky but you value the basis of the family and want it all to stay together, then get your kicks where you can, be tactful and discrete about and everyones a winner baby.