To phone police for abuse?

[inthedarkX]

Last week ex told me he would come see baby today whilst other kids are in school, I agreed. Then he cancelled on me this week saying he's busy with his gf. So I said ok. Then my friend invited me and my children to her house straight after school after school as her primary school children go to same school as my primary school kids . My older children who are in high school were meant to meet me at my friends after they finished after school club. ( they know where it is as we've done this before and bus stop near her house)
Anyway he text me 'I'm at xxxxxx and xxxxxx school picking them up. I told him no we have plans and he had 0 plans to pick the kids up or even come over!!! Anyway he picked them up and a lot of commotion was caused and I ended up having to go home. And our night cancelled! He then text me calling me evil saying I'm stopping him seeing kids coz I wouldn't let him in to see them baby!
That's not the cAse
He then sends me a 'meme' saying baby mamas are spiteful That they can't have you back a baby mother world with you and is consistent
So what he's saying is I have to put my life on hold for him to turn up whenever he wishes!!!
Then I thought let's see if his gf is busy because I think he only wanted to come coz she's busy ! So one look at her Facebook profile with her story has public she's busy with her family ! So he only wanted to come coz she's busy and ruin my plans
Am I being unreasonable to report him for this as it's just abuse now!

I don't see that's a police matter.

Go through the courts.

This is not a police matter.

That isn’t a police matter.

Why didn’t you stay at your friends? I don’t see that there was a need to cancel your arrangements and just tell their dad to drop the older kids to your friends house after he had seen them?

This is not a police matter. Organise proper contact and stick to it.

Can’t really follow what’s occurred properly but the police don’t get involved with miscommunications about access.

It's not just miscommunications, he does this a lot to control my life. If there is no plan to see the kids today, why is it ok for him to just turn up ?

There was no miscommunication he said he wasnt coming 🤷‍♀️ then acts like a dick when she is busy because he said he wasnt coming

Look if he is calling and abusing you report it if he is abusing you infront of the kids report it

Oh lord it's you again, isn't it. The one with several kids and a husband who's jumping between you and his other 'baby mama', right? I think someone in this situation needs to start acting like an adult, go through court and don't speak to each other unless it's essential.

Not a police matter (and I don’t consider this abuse either).
If there’s no court ordered contact times and he’s on their birth certificates, then he’s entitled to collect them and also not return them (I’m afraid).

@Clangus00 so if the kids lives with me and he had NO plans to come for the kids today I'm expected to just accept him coming to pick kids up without a prior arrangement on a whim? And I have to do that?

So make proper arrangements.

@Nicknacky I've been trying for a year he won't. I've spoken to a solicitor and I can't get any legal help with legal aid help unless I get proof of domestic abuse which I can, I told my health visitor so I need to wait to see if I can have a letter from her otherwise I cane afford legal help and court

Why aren’t you sorting out proper contact times and access?

This is why you all moan that there are no police available for your 'proper' jobs.

Because idiots like this OP use them for crap like this.
It's classes as 'Domestic related' which means it gets priority over everything but blue light emergencies when in actual fact it's just some plonker who can't manage their own lives without other people doing the hard work for them.

OP, you are an adult.
Somewhere buried beneath the bunny filters and drama loving craziness, there is somebody who should have the capacity to sort this stuff out by yourself.

This is in no way a police matter and you are an utter twat if you use Police to sort this out for you.

It's not up to the police to teach you two how to coparent properly.

And there we have it people. OP's last uldate. The real reason the OP wants Police involvement.
Because it will give her free legal aid.

Disgusting.

@BobbyBlueCat that was uncalled for! He's been emotionally abusive towards me throughout our marriage and he still is ! That's a crime now. But I won't use them. He's using the kids to control me. I've seen a solicitor about a child arrangement order but need to apply for legal aid ( not in a financial position to pay) but I need letters from professionals to prove emotional abuse

Arrange a meeting with him and work out exact contact times. If he won’t agree then go through mediation

I'm stunned that some of you agree that he should just be able to show up when he wants or else I'm the one inn the wrong. I don't show up at his flat to collect the kids when it's his contact times!

He clearly wants to see the kids so why can you both not sort something out without having to go to court?

Yeah I do think a parent with parental responsibility should be able to pick up their kids

Why shouldn’t he pick the kids up if you DONT have contact organised? It’s always going to be ad hoc then.

You weren't even going to collect them from what you said in your OP? So he hasn't swooped in and taken them. He just picked up his kids!

Your alleged emotional abuse won’t constitute domestic violence. Don’t claim he has been physically violent when he hasn’t, that’s a terrible thing to do for so many reasons, not least the effect that false allegations have on genuine sufferers of domestic violence.

Get contact organised if this arrangement doesn’t suit you.