Dumped by text

[user1471427667]

Bf of 2 years sent me this text in the early hours of this morning.
“Hey I’ve been thinking about us and it’s just not working out so best to end it. No need to reply. All the best”
I feel absolutely blindsided. Didn’t see this coming at all. Aside from the shock of it, I feel so dismissed that he put “no need to reply” as if he I don’t have a say in it ( well I know I don’t but the urge is to try and talk about what he feels is wrong)
Should I ignore what he said and try and contact him to find out what’s wrong and try and work it through or at least end it amicably? Or just accept it somehow and not reply.
I feel as if someone has punched me in the stomach and everything I thought was real just isn’t.
Please help me retain some dignity and tell me best way to reply or not.

He's a coward. Even if he seemed OK, he in fact isn't decent.

Re the "20 page essay" that's not as daft an idea as it first sounds. Except....

..... write it, seal it in an envelope addressed to him, but don't post it - either keep it with your sentimental stuff, or simply set fire to it, or dispose of in some other dastardly way.

When you have the wine, make sure your phone is switched off and locked away until morning. You don't want to drunk-text him once your mate has gone home.

When I was dumped by text after 2 years, I had to give up drinking for a while to make sure that I didn't drunk text him! Unfortunately, he dumped me the day before I went on holiday and I did sent a very cutting message whilst I was away (too much red wine!) so then had to stop myself repeating it.

I absolutely agree with the 'no contact'. Leave him wondering.

Make sure you tell him to get to fuck when he comes crawling back.

Because when he realises the grass isn't greener, he'll be straight back round expecting you to be all delighted and forgiving.

He'll put it down to a little crisis. Moment of madness.

I've had that happen. Oh how I laughed.

Yes if you go out with friends do not text him!

Do not text him. Delete his phone number and unfriend/unfollow him on all social media. Don’t block - that gives the impression that you give a shit. Unfollow just means they have nothing of interest to say to you. I agree with another poster that he wants you to reply. He’ll be sniffing round again in no time if he’s getting no attention from you at all.

What a dick! Hope wine and chocolate is going well

I would reply - oh thank god, I've been trying to work up the courage to do that for ages. All the best x - but I'm a petty bitch.

Had a good evening with friend talking it all through. Having met him several times and seen us together, she can’t believe his actions either. I only had 2 small glasses of wine but because I’d hardly eaten all day, I felt quite drunk!
I should have read your warnings about drunk texting but luckily my friend is as wise as you lot and took my phone off me and switched it off last night. It’s amazing how feeling drunk can make it all seem suddenly a great idea to contact him with the ‘perfect’ text😂
Going to throw myself into work today and try and keep thoughts of him at bay. I like a pp suggestion of allowing a certain time to think about it all/cry etc. So will try and push all thoughts away until, I’m back home later.
Thanks again for getting me through yesterday👍
That thumbs up sign still makes me laugh!!!

Just don't reply - far more powerful than any response clever or otherwise. You won't regret it.

You sound so much more positive today!!

And all because you remained strong and didn't let him and his shitty behaviour get to you.

Keep on putting yourself first

Bit late to the thread but a 'new phone, who dis?' reply would have really messed with him!

Silence is very powerful.
It took me a long time to learn that.
Best of luck with it xx

Just imagine him snatching at his phone every time it beeps and staring, confused, at the screen because it's not you...

or maybe not, if that thought makes you upset. I agree with most others though that this kind of sudden change of mind is usually provoked by another woman (or sometimes a man...) who has turned their heads. Especially when there was no previous sign of dissatisfaction.

You've got this. Your silence is your most powerful weapon. Not that you need a weapon now it's over, but you know what I mean.

Yes I agree with lol 🤣🤣 as a response. Or alternatively don’t respond at all.

Well done OP for being so strong- silence is deadly.
Keep Reminding yourself that a man who sends a msg like that will not give you a good enough reason for his behaviour, texting is pointless.

I agree with OnlyFoolsnMothers texting is pointless, he won't tell you the truth (usually another woman on the go)

This way, YOU have all the dignity.

Come here and vent/cry, whatever. Many of us have survived dickish, shock breakups and come out the other side!

Havent read the whole thread so probably completely irrelevant but are you sure the text was for you?

I do feel slightly stronger today but know that is probably going to be very short lived. For now I’m just taking things an hour or so at a time.
I can’t bring myself to think there is someone else in the picture, of course there could be, but I can’t go there just yet.
On my way to work every car seemed to be his cars make and colour and every song on the radio seemed relevant to ‘us’ in some way.🙁
If I get a weak point over the coming days, I will re read this thread. You lot are amazing. It’s like having 50 badass women and men marching in, giving you a hug and telling you exactly what you need to hear!!! 👍👍👍

If I get a weak point over the coming days, I will re read this thread

This is a good strategy. However, I feel you also need to adopt some conscious strategies to put him out of your mind, so that you do not end up in a pit of despair because you are imagining him with someone else.

Specifically you need to teach yourself diversionary techniques when hurtful images enter your head, such as On my way to work every car seemed to be his cars make and colour and every song on the radio seemed relevant to ‘us’ in some way. Maybe look into CBT?

Sing along loudly and enthusiastically to those songs. Then, if any of those cars are him, he'll see you happy without a care in the world. Not crying over a waste of space coward.

And do delete his number! I also love the idea that silence is your weapon of choice. You’re amazing.

I would text “ goodbye loser, fuck you !” Then block.
Treat yourself to something nice. 💐

I'm so sorry OP. This is really shit. But you will be OK.