Dating thread 181 - into 2020 with finesse and strong boundaries!

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The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

Happy Birthday marls

Happy birthday! I always buy myself presents 😂😂

Happy birthday @Marlboroandmalbec34. Hope this year brings you happiness!!!

Rule #6, @Undecidedsofa!!

Sorry I haven't read through the past few days of the thread, everything moves quickly and I've been spending time with Mr G. 😍 He arrived on Friday, though his flight was delayed and luggage lost. He was stressed by all that, but we still had a good time and he wasn't moody or anything like it. My ex was very moody and it was a sharp contrast to be with someone who can deal with life's inconveniences in a mature way. We went to Bath and did some sight seeing, went to a few nice restaurants (high tea at the Pump Rooms was amazing), saw a play. He's so kind and courteous, gentlemanly, etc. The more I spend time with him, the more endearing he becomes. I'm learning his facial expressions, his moods, his mannerisms. It seems like it would be a bit too full on to spend weekends away together after only dating for 4-5 months but we get along so well. We laugh together, we have interesting, varied discussions, we have amazing chemistry. It's going really well.

I’ve gone swipe mad tonight

Some of these blokes are only 30. I am 40 this year and I wonder if this is too young

Happy birthday @Marlboroandmalbec34 🍷🎂🥳 you bloody fantastic woman!

My big news this week is that I have bought a new bed (channelling @Sunshineandflipflops...) It's being delivered in 4 weeks and MrC will be putting it together for (with?) me. We've been seeing each other over 9 months and he's never been to my house - red flags ahoy!!! 🚩🚩🚩 I've never let a man visit me at home. It's my safe haven and a huge step for me to do this. I'm sure he thinks I have corpses of previous lovers in my loft. The reality is I'm just a really private person but Brene Brown says I need to embrace vulnerability so...

Happy birthday @Marlboroandmalbec34!

Aargh we fill these threads up quickly, I need to catch up!

Happy Birthday @Marlboroandmalbec34 🎂

I'm feeling a bit lost with OLD.

Few brief messages with Mr Spanners earlier- all good but I'm wondering whether to wait for him to ask me out again.

Mr Sharkbite messaged- he seems keen... which always kind of scares me. I don't know if he's too well spoken and posh for me? Should I give him a chance?

Have a new iron- Mr Lips. Who has gorgeous lips 😂 I have managed to match another welsh lad who works nearby and then goes back to the valleys at the weekend. This doesn't bode well does it...

Even with the opportunity a couple of times recently I've not ended up sleeping with Mr Spanners/Mr Sharkbite. I don't know what it is with me at the moment. I don't even really care in some ways- I just felt like I'd regret it.

More than anything I'd like welsh guy to get in touch again but it won't happen. I've accepted it all but it's like I'm still thinking of him so can I fall for someone else?

Yay to the new bed @JeSuisPrest! Mine hasn’t really been ‘broken in’ (not broken, not again please) yet but Mr Ad is coming over this weekend 😁

Well done for letting MrC over-that must be a big step for you.

And happy birthday @Marlboroandmalbec34!

Happy birthday @Marlboro,

@Marlboroandmalbec34 happy birthday

@LeaveBeforeTheLightsComeOn

I’m hating OLD recently as well

I think it’s best to hold back from having sex with them if your brain is telling you to wait. It’s doing that for a reason!

I’ve got some fresh irons - hopefully my new bed will get some action this decade/century 😂

A lot seem to be in IT but they seem more normal than Mr Farts

Mr Pickle - I kind of think he’s cute but I am not 100% sure as his photos are not the most flattering but he is a nice guy so far and seems polite

Mr Sales Manager - a lot older than me but he’s quite cute

Mr Tesco - he has a 2 and a 1yo - NOPE

Mr Dog Tease - got to go

Mr Soulmate - nope

Mr London - not decided yet

Mr Pickle broke up with his WIFE 2 months ago
I mean yay for honesty but... WTF?

@Marlboroandmalbec34 Happy Birthday!

@Lovemusic33 Today has been really quiet for me too - had about 10 chats going over the weekend, but only one has replied to me today. Maybe it's because everyone is feeling down due to it being Blue Monday? Hopefully things pick up for you in the week.

@bangheadhere40 sorry to hear things are so hard with Mr Straight. Meeting someone is way harder than it needs to be sometimes isn't it.

@LeaveBeforeTheLightsComeOn why does it scare you that he's so keen? I've jokingly been accused of being keen before (I thought I was just being super-patient with Miss Confusing, but maybe it came across as keen). I'm also quite well-spoken - I'd hate for someone to turn me down just because of that.

I'm feeling a bit low (Blue Monday maybe?) - have come down with a cold, had my Tuesday date cancel on me, and I've only have a 1 line reply back from one of my irons. I also gave in and messaged Miss Confusing over the weekend after a long 5 days of no contact - had a brief chat, she sent me more pics, but it wasn't a particularly engaging conversation. However she did say yes to meeting up when she's back home next weekend. So I'm still no closer to knowing where I stand! I'm so tempted to just ask her outright if she has had any more thoughts about us, but figure I'll do that face to face if/when we meet next week.

Hopefully my cold will clear up in time for my date with Miss No Name on Thursday, and I've got another pencilled in for the following Thursday too but she's not really in touch that frequently so I'm half-expecting her to cancel.

Happy birthday 🥳

I just had a lovely date 4 with Mr Joiner, we had dinner local to him and then we went to see his place and just watched some tv - I even made him watch Love Island with me 😆

Early days but no red flags as yet!

So after a long text then phone convo looks like I have a boyfriend (or whatever you all someone when you are in your 40s).

@jane yeey really happy for you x x

Yay Jane! That’s lovely xx

Thanks guys. I had a lovely day. Just need to better plan next year. My boy just looked so crestfallen that I didn’t have gifts and balloons (I actually got lovely gifts from the family later) I didn’t think and he is a sensitive soul.

jesuis big step- eeek

perfect he sounds bloody lovely

jane was this the guy you have been casual with for a few months.

leavebefore and thecat it’s so hard to keep swiping and dating when you want someone who isn’t invested in you. Sometimes a break from the apps can help for you both.

I’m massively into a box set so not keeping up with the thread so sorry if I have missed anyone’s big news.

You guys are the best

Yes that one. He said he made a mistake in saying that and wanted to make a go of it and did I feel the same. And I played it cool and said I hadn’t thought about it but I’d give it a go 😂. I’m really not used to a man being so nice and complimentary to me. I’m happy thou

That's great Jane

@jane1978xx really pleased for you.

happy birthday @marl