Dating thread 180 - Deep thoughts on attachment styles, psychology and love bombing. (Oh my!)

[PerfectPretender]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

Being on your own is fine when you choose yourself. Dd is at her dads and I have a few options of places to go or people to see but I’m staying home alone. I haven’t had a night totally alone since Nov so I can’t wait. Also feeling a little shagged out and hungover 😂

Enjoy your date @shitwithsugaron x

Have fun @shitwithsugaron

Can understand that @PerfectPretender it’s tough when people don’t have a clue what’s going on behind closed doors and explaining the reality!

Am I being love bombed here, I’ve a date set up for Wednesday with mr walking but in his texts he’s telling me what he’s going to cook for me, what other dates we can go on etc he is prefacing with if he get on as I called him on it, not sure if this is my insecurities or if he’s over invested, we only matched today!!

Can I join in please?

Separated for about a year after he had an affair. Been on dating apps since before Christmas but just deleted them all because I'm really fed up with all the bs on them!

Most of the men only want sex. I'm not looking for anything serious but is it too much to ask that they make me feel like they want sex with me and not just any available woman who replies to their messages? 😞

Phew. Mr climber asked me to the cinema. Thank god. Otherwise I would have just hung out with the stbx. This is much better

Yay nomore that’s great!

stuck I would find that OTT.

welsh welcome, and no that’s not too much to ask at all. There are some good ones out there, but they take some finding!

Thanks Tiger!

I don't now if I have the patience or the self esteem to keep looking!

*know sorry!

@welsh36
Hi! I started OLD mid October - it is exhausting and demoralising sometimes, isn't it?
I am learning - slowly - to not have any real expectations until meeting people face to face...and really reading, rereading and rereading again the dating rules on this thread - they're wise words

So I spent my afternoon in A&E with a DC getting stitches. Fun times, but all ok now.

I'm still having a wobble about dating and current iron. I'm pretty sure it's nothing to do with him in particular, but about my openess to dating right now. Not sure quite what to do...

I hope everyone who is out tonight has a good time and there are some success updates in the morning 😊

So hear you welsh I’ve deleted all the apps several times, I go through phases of it’s too hard, to but how else will I meet people! It’s tough and a thick skin is required!

I only lasted about an hour before I put them back on again!

I've met up with one guy twice (Mr Long distance) but I felt like I took the lead and he was only interested when it was offerwd to him on a plate. I told him I'm free tonight but the ball was in his court and he had to take the lead in arranging something which is why I'm stuck in on a Saturday night on my own feeling sorry for myself! I didn't even want a lot, just for him to show enough interest to say his place or mine

I'm going on a date with Mr Wings tonight, think I mentioned him before?

How does tight black jumper, black suede mini skirt, tights and black ankle boots sound? A lot of black I know 😂

Boobs out shitwith have a great night.

stuckinarut hmmmmm bit odd! Maybe new to old and excited but proceed with caution.

Great stuff nomore

Welcome welsh not too much to ask at all lovely

I'm glad you gaff BF evacuate @nomoreweepingandwanking

I left that autocorrect as it's so ridiculous.

I'm glad you have a date. Even I got a bit sentimental when exH stayed in Xmas eve and watched a film, you're not in a place to DJ that yet.

Ok so I messaged my 4 bumble matches. Let's watch the bumble/tumbleweed ......

DJ. Ffs...

Accessories? leavebefore

Unambigious - I really struggle with Bumble, the men like you but then when you message them they don't message back. What's that all about??

Phew I thought it was just me on bumble!! Rarely get a message back! Pof seems to be the best option at the moment!

I’ve never had a message back on bumble ever apart from some lad whose age was down as 36 but was 10 years younger and he just wanted a shag.

I’ve banged on about this before, but I think Bumble is a misogynist’s playground because females have to message first, in a hurry : ‘look at all the women chasing after me, I’ll just leave them hanging ha ha!’

Feeling better all the time! Funny how our heads go to must be me, but turns out with bumble it really isn’t!

I'm not massive on accessories I guess.... it's just the local pub I don't want to look too glam...

I want to look young and cool and someone that an early 20s bloke would like 😂

@LeaveBeforeTheLightsComeOn - outfit sounds great...but then I tend to wear a lot of black anyway. Just add nice necklace, fab make up, dazzling smile...

@UncorrectedDoormat, I hope your son is ok.

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking. enjoy the cinema

I'm home alone for the evening - hrmph.
I know it's been asked about 40billion times before, but what next after meeting for first date? Is it just wait to hear? I couldn't read the situation at all.