The Happy Singleton - All welcome!

[SirChing]

Hello, following a thread where I discussed how happy and excited I was to have consciously decided to be single for 2020, it seems there are loads of us out there: People who are single through choice and happy about it.

Some plan on being single forever, some for a shorter time, but none of us are dating or want to date at the moment. We are too busy focusing on the important things in life: us!

This is a thread for anyone who wants to join it, to support and encourage each other, to discuss what we have or hope to learn by being single, and to discuss random practical stuff, like which companies don't charge single supplements for holidays.

Come on in and pull up a chair if you fancy a chat.

Happy 2020 all

Huzzah! Thank you.

What are all the happy singletons doing tonight? My DS is with his dad so I have the house all to myself for the first time in a month! I need to sort the house out a bit (ugh so many jobs to do) but currently cuddling my cat and listening to music (going through a list of my friends top uplifting albums on Spotify). Might watch a film later, no idea idea what..in the morning I'll go running with a running club. Feeling fairly content (my "happy" single status is a work in progress!)

What've you all been upto today?

I had lunch with a friend who I haven't seen for a while, which was nice. Had a glass of prosecco with my fish and chips, so just downing coffee now to feel more perky to do some work tonight for the counselling skills course I'm doing.

That sounds quite nice Thelma, shame about the chores.
Could you break them up and do a bit tonight, a bit more another day etc?

@ThelmaAndLouise2020 and all, have a great evening!

Afternoon everyone! Well due to having been ill for weeks, I have JUST taken down the Xmas tree and cleaned the lounge. Done some other chores and told my ex how much the solicitors fees will be for the divorce. 2k! And that's just one solicitor! Good job we are splitting the fees between us. Its a right scam. It Will cost us over £3k to divorce in total. Bonkers!

And the fucking cat has fucking fieas.....I am not happy! I have deflead her and flea sprayed everywhere but its the thought more than anything. Bleurgh!

So not the best day ever. Still, beef stroganoff in front of the telly for me later which will be nice and relaxing. And maybe a long bath. Bliss!

Yep that's exactly what I've decided to do @Interestedwoman - a few easy jobs tonight so I don't feel guilty...the rest can wait til tomorrow!

Sorry you've been so poorly @SirChing and you have my sympathies re: flea infestation, the horror! Hope you get rid of the little shits ASAP.

Enjoy your evenings everyone x

Can I join? XH left a year ago (v nearly divorced) and while I am still adjusting/dealing with the fallout in some ways I am already fairly happy on my own.

The thought of another relationship fries my brain. I won’t be seeking one out!!

I am home alone this weekend. Saw a friend for tea earlier and ate a box of champagne truffles for lunch. Dinner could be fish and chips, lentil curry or some sort of stuffed pasta (in view of lunch not particularly hungry yet).

I do need to create a social life as I moved somewhere new a couple of years ago and don’t have close friends here.

Have a kitten and a teenager at home, busy job, enough cash I guess, studying as well.

I play tennis and do a couple of other sporty things.

Need to find something to watch on tv this evening- no idea what that will be as I don’t watch enough to know what is out there.

@KitKatBox Welcome! Love your name - although champagne truffles are definitely a step up from KitKats.

I could have written so much of what you said. Bar the grumpy teenager. I have a grumpy 9 year old going through puberty. Which is as much fun as it sounds!

I need to redevelop a social life too. I moved to be near my ex and so friends were joint. He now has custody of them, as they can't get their heads around him and me getting on, and have decided to pick sides. Despite him asking them not to. Weirdos!

I am joining the local choir group, and the WI, and am thinking of volunteering. What are your plans?

Away for the weekend. With dogins. We are holed up in a hotel. May order room service. X

Thank you for the welcome SirChing. Commiserations, I was told that puberty is nature’s way of ensuring we aren’t completely heartbroken by our kids growing up and leaving home ... a very wise friend who has fostered dozens of teens.

I am joining the WI too - have gone for the one that makes cocktails, not jam.

My tennis lesson group is really friendly but I can only play once a week (they all play more) so I am thinking of giving it up in March.

I do another sport that’s really friendly too. Might return to yoga or Pilates.

I volunteer already (JP) so probably won’t add to that.

I haven’t done much til now because I felt I had to be there for DC. I work a lot incl a couple of nights away each month. I think she is getting there though and that I need to get out and start making a new life for myself.

Hi everyone. I posted a couple of days ago but I'm home alone this evening having waved the kids off to their dad's until next week and I don't have plans on a free Saturday for the first time in months. Part of me is looking forward to watching my box set and chilling...but another part feels a bit lost and purposeless.

I had mentioned a guy I was vaguely seeing but he's not been in touch since midweek and I'm not just a toy to be picked up and put down. So that's that. I plan to have a break from any male interest for a good long while but it's hard sometimes to be on your own.

Sorry, I should possibly read the thread title again

Who knows, maybe some of us could have a meet up sometime? Give us something to get upto, and we could moan about men, chat about what we're doing now etc, and have cocktails and/or coffee :)

@Accidentalaccountant Do it! Get the room service. I am only slightly envious, can you tell?

@KitKatBox I love that quote about puberty and teenagers - brilliant. Mine THINKS she is a teenager, and strops like one. If she gets worse when she actually IS a teenager, then I intend to spend those years in a vodka induced haze. I may sober up when she is 20 to see if she has become a human again

@Misty9 That's not good! He doesn't sound like a nice bloke at all. If he isn't keen, he must be stupid. And who wants to date someone stupid? His loss for sure And you will get happy in the end, even if you don't feel it right now. Honestly x

@Interestedwoman - that's a great idea! I don't mind travelling darn Sarf if needs be. Bagsy me not arranging it though, my memory is shocking at the moment and I am bound to fuck it up!

Ooh @SirChing I'm looking for a choir to join too

Hello my favourite people! I am exhausted!! Me and boy wonder (9yo- and so far from puberty @sirching - he is tiny and still very much a baby- I hope it never changes! How naive am I?!) went down to Brighton and bought the sofa! Whoop. Beans on toast for the rest of my life, but it's beautiful. Habitat swift chaise in grey velvet 🥰🥰🥰.

Then got other house bits and bobs. Seems that dh took more from the old house then I'd thought... 🤨. I am watching the money drain from my account. I feel your pain about legal fees @sirching ... we are about halfway through the process, and I can't believe how much it is costing.

We grabbed a thai takeaway. I am finally now sitting down to watch dead water fell.

@accidentalaccountant - right about now I would very gladly swap for a quiet hotel and room service.
@misty9 he's an arse. Well rid.
@kitkatbox welcome! 🙂

Just recalled one of my favourite quotes: "a bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because it's trust is not in the branch, but on its own wings". We've got this single life wrapped up!

Have good zzz's all!

An awful lot of bold there... typing fail.

Thanks both for kind words. I am feeling a bit like a fool right now though. I can't believe this guy has just ghosted me. Sigh.

I have an 8yo boy and it feels like he'll never grow up either - whereas his nearly 6yo sister already seems like a teenager!

Does anyone else look forward to a night on their own without dc just to relax and then find they can’t bloody sleep!!

@Zofloramummy my DC are adults now so I can't remember that far back, but my sleep is dreadful anyway, so I can sympathise to an extent!

@Misty9 it's been a very long time since I did OLD, and reading about peoples experiences on MN, I don't think I have the resolve to do it againit can make you feel elated but also really shit!

@KitKatBox welcome. I also love that puberty quote

@Interestedwoman I'd be up for a meet up, don't mind travelling either

I'm feeling a bit lost if I'm honest, I do get like this a lot, but I do try my best to get out and keep busy. This weather is so grim though, it really doesn't help ones mood

I hope you all have a good day today

@Itsallpointless it wasn't even OLD, we met in real life I won't touch OLD as its all so fake.

I know how you feel with the lost feeling. I'm off on a meetup hike at the coast today so that should take my mind off things. Hope you manage a nice day maybe hibernate in a nice bookshop with a cafe? I love doing that

@Zofloramummy 😂 listen to this: yesterday I worked, but then I had a friend for a cosy dinner, DD went to friends overnight, all according to plan. I’m also on annual leave for a week.
Came from work, rested for a bit with a coffee, ready to go food shopping for tonight’s dinner and the lurgy hit me. So so bad. Proper all my joints are extremely painful, gallons of snot, headache, the lot. On my first day of annual leave. On an evening planned etc.
I have no idea how I did it last night, I didn’t want to cancel on my friend because however you present it, it’s shit to cancel an hour and a half before.
We had a nice time, chatting and drinking and having a lovely meal. That I could not taste.

Rest day for me, although once the meds kick in, I’ll go for a quick 5 k run, just around the park, I’ll stop if it’s too much, but I need to do it.

Never been on OLD either. And don’t intend to.

@mildlymiffed did you get the corner one? I had a look, nice!!!!! You’re in my neck of the woods :)

@Accidentalaccountant ah, bliss, holed up in a hotel!!! Where did you do?

Hello to everyone, hope you’re having a good Sunday.
The arvo plan is to make a cake, walk the dog with a friend, come home and eat the said cake, early night :)

@itsallpointless sorry you've got that weird empty feeling today. Hope it passes soon. I've got a can't be arsed feeling today. I've overdone it the last few weeks. So we can feel out of sorts together.

@BuddhaAtSea yes... I got the corner one! In a beautiful grey velvet. An absolute indulgence but it'll make the new house look pretty. My dbro has agreed to purchase the old one (not for enough- harrumph- but hopefully will get some good karma). Brighton was alright yesterday. I should have gone by train- but stupidly we drove, and paid through the nose for parking. So felt incredibly rushed so not to spend a stupid amount on parking. Live and learn.

Ds wants to go for a swim. I know it'll do me good... but again, can't be arsed. He's like an unleashed puppy today though and needs energy burning off. Maybe I'll try a few handstands to lift my mood!!!

@BuddhaAtSea hope the lurgy passed through speedily.... it's a bitch being ill, especially when you're single and there's no one to fetch and carry for you!

So it's nearly the end of my holiday in Thailand.. I've done little other than relax, read, eat and try some fabulous gins!!!
For those of you old enough to remember, my hair is in a permanent state of frizz, a bit like Crystal Tips from Crystal Tips & Alistair but absolutely no point trying to tame it, it's back to frizz within 5 mins!!
Hope everyone has managed just a little bit of relaxation today

Single here too, thanks for the thread!

Not bitter and twisted, just have no interest whatsoever in a relationship. I think maybe I was one of those 'mate for life' creatures and when that got kiboshed, don't want to do it with anyone else. People who cannot bear to be alone and will be with anyonein order not to be - not something I really get.

I have NO interest of "being social worker/ surrogate mother/ financial sponsor to men who think that single mothers of a certain vintage should be just grateful for their attention".

Nope. Enjoying my space, my time, my interests, my money management!

Still have a few wobblies about things like, going on holiday on my own (the biggest one) and also having a meal on my own in restaurants, but with lots of friends, that becomes a bit of a non issue anyway!

Those of you that have had a big holiday on your own, can you tell us about it?

@SirChing I watched my poor cat running around on Friday, def. acting as though she was being bitten by s/thing. Completely new behaviour, frantically licking her lower legs and tail and then trying to run away from it.

So got this oily stuff in a syringe from the pet shop, which you put on the back of the neck between the ears and the shoulder blades, which sorts out fleas, ticks, lice - and deworms as well!

So hopefully I have covered all the little buggers, and she looks comfortable again.