Dating thread 179 - am I doing it right?

[Chochito]

Looked for the new thread but couldn't find it...

@TheresGotToBeMoreToLife I would also recommend match I only joined just before new year and I'm getting lots of likes and chat requests I was on eHarmony previously where not a lot happens - which wasn't great for my self esteem! - and the men who did contact me weren't ones I'd be interested in. So an update from me, another day, another iron, I'll call this one Mr airport. We've been having an in depth conversation about vacuum cleaners of all things but I like the fact that he's chatty ..so many aren't so it makes a nice change! We'll see if anything develops. Also I can't sleep for some reason hence the middle of the night update!

I don't think it's over excitement about meeting Mr airport that's stopping me from sleeping...I think it's more likely to be because I mixed lemsip and alcohol which probably wasn't the best idea

To come in on a few other points, yes agree most of these men just want to chat online seemingly and I don't get it either, surely the whole point of a dating site is to meet people to date, I was doing old fifteen years ago it's how I met my ex and it was different then, I used to get asked on dates all the time, I used to go on loads of dates! But I think with these online guys nowadays you've got to be ruthless quite frankly if you want to meet them tell them and if they don't want to block, delete and on to the next one, otherwise it seems like nothing happens in real life and it all just stays online. God only knows where they are actually getting dates and sex from , or is it because they're all actually married?! I would say is it my age but then younger women say they have the same problem with men online not wanting to meet in real life. So I dunno it's weird but it is what it is. As far as meeting men irl goes I seem to meet them mostly at work and I've also been approached in supermarkets, at bus stops and walking down the street. I give the guys at work a chance to prove themselves - none of them have so far! - I find the randomers a bit intimidating and tend to blow them off although I did once agree to a date with a guy I met in Starbucks so you can't completely rule it out as a way to meet someone

Stillsexystillsingle, if you are getting approached at random places in real life you do not need to be OLD, I should be so lucky.

@shitwithsugaron so glad it went well and you liked the bar!

So I take it date #2 is on the cards?

Mr B who 😁

Yay shitwith so pleased for you.

Snazzy please just meet for a coffee/tea somewhere - it doesn't have to be an expensive date.

Kermit phew!

Oh boy oh boy do I have an update! 🤣

So my weekend plans were Mr Rigger on Fri night to see if I fancied him this time.

Mr climber sat morning. First date after talking for 3 weeks or so

Mr Hong Kong sat evening. First date after talking since Monday.

Mr Rigger got held up at work so I said to not worry about it. He'd gone a bit quiet and I cba with chasing. However I'd had an epically shitty day at work. I'm still on probation at new job and I got told I have my review on Monday and there are ,,'concerns'. So yeah.

Was on the phone to Mr Hong Kong ding how crap I felt about being on my own when I had expected to see a friend so he invited me to his . I went. Drank wine. Had lots of really nice chat. Shagged. He's lovely but not going to be more than FWB and I'm worried he might get the feels (he very much is on a place where he wants to settle down) so I need to check in with him that I haven't changed my position on relationships...

Anyway. I went straight from his to the climbing centre. Mr climber was just like his pictures. There was attraction and, quite quickly, flirting and innuendo. I did a bloody good job climbing and impressed myself, also maybe him, but he couldn't climb with the types because I haven't done the necessary choose to belay so I suggested we went on the bouldering wall so we could both have a go. Again I did really well until I fell off and landed on my ankle and there was a loud crack...

So yeah. My 2 hour date at a climbing centre turned into a 6 hour date at a climbing centre and a&e. Thank god we got on our it would have been torture lol. As it was it was bizarrely good fun... Despite the pain.

Oh. And the ankle isn't broken. Phew.
Memorable first date though. Got a kiss, too.

Echo what an absolute wanker!

God my typos. Sorry.
*He couldn't climb with ropes because I haven't done the necessary course to belay

nomore wow that is a story to tell yours and Mr Climber’s grandchildren! So glad your ankle is not broken, hope you’re ok

Holy shit NoMore!! I boulder climb and twisted my ankle once falling off - but your story makes me rethink my hobby! Sounds very eventful, and I hope tomorrow's review at work goes well for you.

@nomore how do you have the energy 😂. I hope your ankle is ok ! Will you carrying on seeing them ?

shitwith yay!!!

nomore glad your ankle is ok, sounds like an interesting weekend. Good luck with work and yay for Mr Climber.

Messaging going ok with Mr Fact. He is very lovely but no real banter. I just got a “morning lovely Marlbs* message. Still no mention of a 2nd date. Thing is I have no urge to swipe I know I should get more irons but I don’t want to do I’m not.

Tigerdater what’s happening with FWB you were L-wording the other night? Think it was Mr Greedy. Could it be more?

marlbs thank you for asking but I have absolutely no idea what’s happening, I’m in a complete and utter tangle with both Mr Greedy and Mr Mad, plus a sweet new iron who I started messaging on NYE - arranged to meet on Tuesday, I can’t bear to let him down, I’m pathetic. I’m also working like a maniac. Most importantly my last DD is leaving home for good tomorrow 😥😥😥 though bless her she’s so happy and in love 🥰🥰🥰. I’m emotionally wrung out and in constant need of a lie-down!

Hi just need some advice. I’m totally new to old. My friend signed me up NYE after too much champagne. I’m soon to be 50 and set my age at 46-56. Had quite a lot of like from men in their 20’s or ones over 65. Most looked like they’d done a 10 stretch. The ones I did like all seemed to live hours away. I was going to suspend it as wasn’t really feeling it when a very attractive man messaged me, I will call him Mr Italian. His age said he was 65 but unless he had found some miracle face cream this was wrong so I jokingly messaged him back about this. He said he’d messed up creating his account and he did put in his bio that his age was wrong. This is my first red flag, why not message Match to change it. Second one is he is very handsome like 9/10 so I’m thinking why is he messaging me (2 kids average middle aged women). He asked to move to WhatsApp on second day and we messaged all yesterday evening. My third concern is his texts often read a bit like broken English ( he moved to this country 30 yrs ago so would that still be the case?). Forth concern he asked for my email, I said no, which he was fine with. Last one is he has no children(fine, said he never met right person), his parents are both dead ( very feasible), his dad was an orphan - so basically it’s just him. Am I being catfished??? He has no picture on his WhatsApp but you can see when he’s on it. He did try and call me at 11pm to say goodnight and he wanted me to hear his voice as he said he has a strong accent and it puts some women off. I didn’t answer as we were all in bed. Am I being paranoid? Should I just keep my guard up and see how it goes? He’s only been on match a few days and said his last partner cheated with a work friend. He also said he’d never done old before. Sorry it’s so long!!

Today is apparently the day most people join online dating in the whole year !!

@osbourne123 it does seem a little odd some of those things. Do you know his surname ? To maybe look him up on Facebook or linked in etc. I would suggest joining one of the other apps like Pof or tinder or bumble , there are a lot of men in that age range on there who have a lot of pics and Info on themselves and seem very genuine . I am 40 but I do have settings up to 50. It’s also easier to set distance on those apps and Pof you don’t need to match either

He can send a voice clip and a selfie over WhatsApp. Maybe do that.

I am American so I have sent voice clips over WhatsApp more than once.

Tiger sounds very busy! Bless you, hope moving out day goes ok

Sounds like a classic catfish to me

Ok thanks. He’s apparently got a good job, which is why I’m thrown a bit with some of the poor grammar.
Also the rush for my email, he said it’s because he wanted to write to me in more detail about himself and his job.
Last question, how long in general do you message before you meet in person?

osborne if you like him from messaging I would suggest pushing for a meeting ASAP. Any hesitance or prevarication from him on that, move on.

Cross posted - my rule is ‘one week to meet’. If they’re not suggesting a coffee within a couple of days of starting to chat, forget it

And the email thing is bloody weird