Dating thread 178 - where we launch into the new year with new hopes

[NoMoreWeepingAndWanking]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

@Menora he is a massive dodged bullet. Honestly this isn't right. Have you blocked him?

Hello to Janice and Sharon!

menora this guy has taken up way too much of your headspace already, he’s exhausting to the end!

I would maybe tell him you are back with an ex or you’ve met someone.. if he thinks you are alone and single he may continue to try and pursuade you back

Tell him he’s put you off men so you’ve decided to go for women.

@shitwithsugaron

I always read you name fast as ‘Sharon’

It’s literally because it starts with Sh and ends with on

😂😂

@Menora he is being super creepy. Seriously, block him and report his account to bumble. That man should not be on there!

When I was on tinder all those months ago, I got talking to a guy who seemed interesting. I then decided to delete tinder as I wasn't ready but asked him if he wanted to add me to WA he could. He did and we've been talking ever since. Then the chat just faded off and it was just small talk. Since Christmas though he has been messaging me every day. But he's not asked me out or anything. I'm not sure what to make of it.

He's just said he needs a distraction. So want to ask him out for coffee or something but feel like a loser because I don't know whether he is actually interested

Distraction from what?

@SimonJT. Yes ! Say I’ve decided to pursue that side of my feelings

My old ‘pen pal’ who couldn’t meet up for 6 weeks then wanted to wait another month is still on Pof looking for a relationship 🤣.

I would be insulted by that, @CheesecakeAddict. You're not a toy to pick up and out down whenever he feels like it.

Can I join you please? Used to be on this thread years ago but single again and back on OLD. I've been reading for a few days now and remembered how supportive this can be

Relationship wise, met a gorgeous man on OLD 7 years ago, all documented on very old threads but he was sadly killed in a road accident nearly 5 years ago. I was his very first date on MATCH!

Dated since then with one on/off relationship which is now truly off for good and dipping my toe in again. A few new irons already but feeling like if I could take the best parts of 3 of them, I could meet my perfect man!

Which reminds me of a friend once remarking on my OLD pursuits and pointing out that it's not Build a Bear

OK won't say anything, as yes, I do feel a bit like the fallback.
A distraction from his home life (his daughter has gone back to her mum and he is sad).
I just feel like all my conversations on OLD just stop. I get loads of matches, but barely anyone responds when I make the first move and today someone unmatched me minutes after we matched. So I'm assuming he realised I had a kid. Or I'm not as attractive as he first though 🙈.

@TigsytheTiger that's so sad. I'm really sorry to hear that.

Great that you already have some irons!

@TigsytheTiger great to have you on here, I'm sorry about your loss 💐

I love the build a bear analogy!

Thank you, I've got to stage where it's a painful part of my past rather than my present, which doesn't sound great but actually is how it should be to move forward.

I'm hoping my new year enthusiasm doesn't wane too quickly.

Already exchanged messages with one guy gushing about how I was his type etc etc. I'm mid 50's and he mentioned he had an 8 year old and said I assume that may put you off? I said no, I'm open minded and he promptly blocked me

Luckily now I just laugh at such ridiculous behaviour!

@Menora you've been talking about his red flags for numerous pages of this thread. This man is clearly not for you, don't waste anymore headspace on him. There are plenty of more suitable men for you out there.

@TigsytheTiger

That’s so sad. Glad to have you here, I really hope you get some nice irons

Arabella - it’s done with now and over and sorted. Is putting me off using Bumble though for now as I feel watched. I think I will have a break for a bit