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Original poster

Dating thread 178 - where we launch into the new year with new hopes

999 replies

NoMoreWeepingAndWanking · 28/12/2019 14:37

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. Know your worth.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

**

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item

OP posts:
unambiguousbeard · 30/12/2019 15:31

I'm 51 and 10 stone. I'm a damn sight more attractive than many women ten years my junior. Their loss?

Why don't you date women of your own age @TheCatWithTheHat ?

dancemom · 30/12/2019 15:32

Thank you everyone

It was actually the second time he had cancelled on me so I think he's flaky more than hungover but either way he's gone.

Just a cumulation of events lately after discovering the iron I thought was The One was actually married so this has tipped me over the edge. Going to hibernate for a few days to lick my emotional wounds and then come back ready to put myself out there again 🙈

cheerup · 30/12/2019 15:37

@CheesecakeAddict I'm now inclined to agree. He was a dark horse though, I thought he was all poetic and romantic but maybe that was part of an act? I think I'll stick with my usual types, at least I know where I stand.

TheCatWithTheHat · 30/12/2019 15:41

@unambiguousbeard I just checked my Bumble settings and my range is 30-47. I have been swiping women of around my own age as well as younger but have only been on there a short while so haven’t met anyone yet. I wouldn’t rule out dating someone my own age - it all depends on whether we fancy each other and click. I have only ever had relationships with women younger than me though.

Also now I’m aiming more at the mid-late 30’s range as I think I would like to have kids. My previous ex of 8 years couldn’t have children so I’d put the idea out of my mind. However the previous woman I was dating for the last few months was clear from the start she wanted them, and it made me think long and hard about whether I would want that - and I realised that I would.

halfthesun · 30/12/2019 16:09

In pub waiting for Mr Cycle ... 8 minutes late ... keep thinking about that Friends episode 😳

Dawsoncreek · 30/12/2019 16:10

Has he messaged u to explain why he’s later? Best of luck ! :)

halfthesun · 30/12/2019 16:11

The one, I think, when Phoebe says to Ross do you think she saw you and didn't come in ... lots of windows here, he may have seen me and changed his mind. If so he is horrid! Especially as I have bought him a pint as requested!!

halfthesun · 30/12/2019 16:13

Just messaged him and asked if he has seen me and changed mind ... will of course keep you updated. Walked here, about an hour, so hair slightly bonkers ... surely no reason not to come in?

LeaveBeforeTheLightsComeOn · 30/12/2019 16:15

@halfthesun I hope not, he's a dick if he's done that! Let us know when he gets there!

Undecidedsofa · 30/12/2019 16:22

so much to catch up on...
I say I have a teenage DD in my info on Match (brutal re age/height/weight etc)
I have actually stated I am not slim/athletic to men who have asked for dates with that on their 'list'; it is clear from the photos, so I am not sure the purpose of the 'wish list' we fill out.
I'm 46 and my age range is 44-54, I am thinking I should perhaps lower this? I'm a chunky (size 14/16) mum who works FT though - I can't really see myself attractive young, carefree men..?
I have Mr Popcorn coming round for date 4 in a bit - I have put on weight and realised that OLD has highlighted many of my body insecurities...I have had a glass of wine with one of my friends Grin I am going to work on how I view my self in the NY (rather than seeing myself through the eyes of my exes - not good)

CheesecakeAddict · 30/12/2019 16:23

@halfthesun I hope he's turned up!!

Frenchlady14 · 30/12/2019 16:37

Tried to post but don't have a good connection so apologies if they both come up together

It's difficult for me as I live in rural France - not very many irons to choose from :)

LeaveBeforeTheLightsComeOn · 30/12/2019 16:41

How long after deleting tinder do you leave it before going back on? I'm tempted just to delete and start again 😂

halfthesun · 30/12/2019 17:05

He's here .... lovely, but got lost!

saltysally · 30/12/2019 17:19

@undecidedsofa I'm a similar age two you and would only go down a couple of years. All of my partners have been older than me. Oddly it's only with FWBs that I have had more interest just a couple of years younger.

UtterSocks · 30/12/2019 17:29

@TigerDater go for it. I bloody love you and your attitude and feel we have a lot in common and want to be you one day

UtterSocks · 30/12/2019 17:31

@unambiguousbeard me you too. Am 50 and 9 stone 3 and toned as hell with stand out abs. If men my age who are a bit flabby and want 35 year olds am glad they are off my feed ti be frank.

TigerDater · 30/12/2019 17:32

Ha ha uttersocks I’m not sure about that, but I think I will take him up on his kind offer! Mr Smooth I shall call him, such lovely skin. Too much time with family over Christmas has made me extremely frustrated.

saltysally · 30/12/2019 17:34

Welcome @frenchlady14

UtterSocks · 30/12/2019 17:37

Just home from date with MrMedia. Had pencilled in an hour or so. It was 4 and we did not top talking and laughing. He is fabulous. Very successful, clever, funny, fit, slim, interesting, nice. Not bad looking but just not my type. Did not give me the fanny gallops. Unlike Mr Sex Bloke who totally did but I hated him, thick as shit, vain and voted Brexit. What do I do? Accept another date and see if it builds? Or let him move on and keep looking? Don’t want to waste his time but was genuinely disappointed when we had to leave the restaurant. He would be an ideal male best friend.

bangheadhere40 · 30/12/2019 17:39

Mr Smile is growing on me, no worrying etc he's sweet. He has offered to help me with a job this week that would have cost me hundreds of pounds as he is in the trade. Bit odd for a second date but he insists. I hope he chills out a bit as he is very hyper.

bangheadhere40 · 30/12/2019 17:40

The originalMr straight I think was trying to gauge if I will sleep with him if I meet him. I got that impression so I made it clear not. He's not been in touch since, jerk.

bangheadhere40 · 30/12/2019 17:43

@utter not sure....I think Mr Smile would be a good friend. Will give one more go...It can grow I think.

saltysally · 30/12/2019 17:49

I met Mr Hair for a very quick drink. He has that quiet confidence which I find very sexy. No deal breakers yet and am hopefully meeting some time the week after next

saltysally · 30/12/2019 17:50

@uttersocks I'd give it another shot but it all depends on whats important to you.