Guy I was chatting to on whatsapp just disappeared !

[AL75]

For a month now I was chatting on phone and messaging a guy I met online. Twice we had to postpone meeting due to ill health either he was not well or I was not well. Our last contact was last Thursday night and I have heard nothing since then, it's now been 6 days. I have noticed the last time he was on whatsapp was the last time he messaged me so he isn't communicating with anyone on whatsapp. He definitely has not blocked me as I can see his online status and no reason for him to stop contact as we were getting on extremely well. I called 2 days ago twice and went straight to voicemail. I have no idea if something tragic has happened to him and no way of finding out. I don't know what to think anymore as this is quite uncharacteristic of him to do this. It has been now 6 days which is very unusual for him not to get in touch. At the beginning I was angry that he wasn't going on whatsapp not reading my messages but now it looks like he isn't using his phone completely and am now worried and extremely sad that it looks like it's come to an end. If he was physically able to, he could log on to dating site he found me on from pc and message me that way but he hasn't and not answering to mail from site that I am sending. I don't know what to think. Every morning he used to whatsapp me good morning or every other morning around 5.45 am before he went on his morning run and am worried something happened last Friday when I heard nothing. I feel so devastated 😔

I mean this in the nicest possible way but you're acting like a psycho stalker...

You have never met him and yet you are saying you'll never forget him?

You sound way too invested in this.

I'd leave him be. He clearly isn't interested.

Some advice...dont behave this way with the next one, or you'll end up in the same situation.

You need to learn how to rationalise potential relationships and act accordingly. Perhaps a self help book can teach you ways to prevent becoming so attached in future.

I am so invested in this date also. I need to know if it's still happening 😳

Good luck with your interview

I think if i'd tried to arrange a date 5 times that didn't happen, i'd give up.

.

I had to postpone the date as I got a call from the recruitment agency booking an immediate interview at that time, couldn't say no as I am desperate to find work

Course you did. This thread is becoming a fantasy tale of face saving.

@DorothyParkersCat yep!

New date arranged OP?

Just to let you know if anyone was curious, turned out to be a real player ☹️. Never met to, he went Canada for 2 weeks over Xmas and when he returned was complaining of jet lag so left him to it to get back into his routine. Senced something was up as used to see him online alot which was unusual. Asked him if he is chatting to anyone else and he lied and said no. I then went on dating site and saw his picture profile back up which he had taken off during the two months he was talking to me, now active again. Anyway, I ended it saying he blew his chances with me. I have really had enough of Online dating sites, so many players, none genuine. Lost faith and trust I'll find anyone ever...

Urgh. What a time waster. I will never go OLD again because of idiots like this! It will hurt as you invested time in him but please look for someone in the real world or stay single until your bullshit radar is better. That’s what I’m doing x

So you'd never actually met... just chatting on WhatsApp... yet you expected him to remove his OLD profile?!

Ok......

Jesus some of you mumsnetters, your replies?! Not necessary AT ALL

I agree actually, some really gleefully nasty posts on this thread.

If you didn't meet within 2 months it was never going to happen. As for blowing his chances with you, please don't say anything like that to him again, he'll be laughing.

Just to let you know if anyone was curious, turned out to be a real player

Isn't that what everyone was telling you from the start?

Christ some of you are vile.

Sorry op.

Sometimes you just have to find out for yourself. Sorry it wasn’t what you’d hoped OP.

You’ll find someone, just try to hold a little back next time. You were too invested, much too fast, and so you ended up more hurt than you needed to be. Maybe take some time out from OLD or dating at all, work on your self esteem and your boundaries and come back when you’re feeling more emotionally resilient.

Sorry to hear you wasted your time with a player. Next time block and delete as soon as he goes missing and don’t entertain his bullshit excuses. Yea you might get rid of a genuine guy but lots of bullshitters on OLD.

You should uninstall the try to reinstall whatsapp

Or you can try to use GB Whatsapp

@Notcoolmum

If you've not met and not got him on social media how do you know he's not in a relationship or living with his cousin. You only know what he's told you. That's not the same as what is fact.

This.

I know you believe him, but you don't actually have any independent evidence.

You must know his name and where he lives. To satisfy your trust in him, check police and hospitals if you like.

But I'm afraid really he's just gone. It will be up to him if he reappears.

Very hard but you need to commit him to memory only. And move on.

Zombie thread folks....

I don't know what a zombie thread is but yes sorry posted before reading updates!

@AL75 Bloody hate blokes like this. Why can’t they just have the balls to say that they’re no longer interested? Just move on OP, your perfect man is out there.

Awww sorry OP I remember when I was younger being ‘ghosted’ and it did hurt for a little bit... id say he likely in a relationship/married or maybe he’s just scared of commitment/thinks you’re too good. Block his number too so he can’t randomly message you with mind games and move on... they’ll be someone lovely for you out there!