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Original poster

Guy I was chatting to on whatsapp just disappeared !

302 replies

AL75 · 04/12/2019 11:18

For a month now I was chatting on phone and messaging a guy I met online. Twice we had to postpone meeting due to ill health either he was not well or I was not well. Our last contact was last Thursday night and I have heard nothing since then, it's now been 6 days. I have noticed the last time he was on whatsapp was the last time he messaged me so he isn't communicating with anyone on whatsapp. He definitely has not blocked me as I can see his online status and no reason for him to stop contact as we were getting on extremely well. I called 2 days ago twice and went straight to voicemail. I have no idea if something tragic has happened to him and no way of finding out. I don't know what to think anymore as this is quite uncharacteristic of him to do this. It has been now 6 days which is very unusual for him not to get in touch. At the beginning I was angry that he wasn't going on whatsapp not reading my messages but now it looks like he isn't using his phone completely and am now worried and extremely sad that it looks like it's come to an end. If he was physically able to, he could log on to dating site he found me on from pc and message me that way but he hasn't and not answering to mail from site that I am sending. I don't know what to think. Every morning he used to whatsapp me good morning or every other morning around 5.45 am before he went on his morning run and am worried something happened last Friday when I heard nothing. I feel so devastated 😔

OP posts:
miamiibiza · 09/12/2019 04:43

Any update OP?

shiveringsparklingtimber · 09/12/2019 10:24

@miamiibiza OP won't be back and who could blame her with that pack of MN hyenas baying for her blood. Angry

anotherdisaster · 09/12/2019 11:25

God why do people immediately assume he's dodgy?? Yes of course that is a possibility but to me, the evidence suggests something may have happened. Blokes don't think twice about just blocking and he's not done that.
OP, the only thing I'll say is that its up to him to attempt to get in touch with you. He should be able to log into the dating app to get your number so all you can do is wait now unfortunately.

DorothyParkersCat · 09/12/2019 11:34

@miamiibiza OP won't be back

She won't be back because she won't have any updates because she's been ghosted. The best it will be is few half hearted further texts of the been busy how are you keeping his hand in type. Nothing to report as he's been silent.

thecatsarecrazy · 09/12/2019 16:09

Be thankful you didn't meet him. It's a lot worse when you get ghosted after ☹️.

Azzizam · 09/12/2019 16:43

I was talking to a guy back in August who just disappeared mid conversation. I wasn't too bothered, just think it's fucking immature and pathetic.
Just last week a message on WhatsApp suddenly popped up fro him. "Hey gorgeous! Long time no chat". Again immature and pathetic and a waste of space.
I take great pleasure in returning the silence!
But in the early stages of OLD I took a lot of these rejections to heart, especially if I'd met and had sex and was ghosted. It bloody hurts.

ZestyMaximus · 09/12/2019 16:57

The guy who ghosted me a few years ago was a property developer too and lived with his brother. A bit of internect checking and it turns out he was married and definitely not a property developer.

thecatsarecrazy · 10/12/2019 10:31

I met someone in September. Messaged me all the time to the point of being a bit overbearing. We only chatted for about a month before meeting. After we met heard absolutely nothing from him. One flirty reply to a tweet then he just disappeared. I gave in and WhatsApped him to say how upset I was he said he was sorry.. wasn't me busy with work but that was it. He never goes on twitter anymore. Didn't block me his account still there but he never uses it.

Original poster
AL75 · 10/12/2019 21:38

He got back to me today saying he's just got back from India. At the time we last messaged, his aunt past away and he dropped everything and went there. Didn't have roaming on his phone where he went which is understandable. His aunt used to live in UK and was major part of his life, mentioned her alot so I know he's telling the truth. We'll see what happens....

OP posts:
fuzzymoon · 10/12/2019 22:06

Oh I'm so pleased that he didn't ghost you. Watch this space.

Ninjakittysmellz · 10/12/2019 22:13

But.... but..... even if he dropped everything and went to India, even if he literally picked up his bag and went to the airport right now this second...,, would he not of texted you from airport to say he was going?!

You are so keen to accept the crumbs he is throwing you, you aren’t thinking sensibly!

forumdonkey · 10/12/2019 22:15

Once again you're believing everything he's telling you. He literally dropped everything and got an immediate flight right there and then. Couldn't drop you a message during the airport to wait for his flight?

Remember he's a stranger and don't know him or anything about him

forumdonkey · 10/12/2019 22:16

@Ninjakittysmellz great mind's think alike

RLOU30 · 10/12/2019 22:20

To me this just says his wife/partner got suspicious so he let the trail go cold for a while and has now come back to pick up where he left of. There’s no way (in my mind anyway) that someone will go offline completely for that length of time no matter where they are in the world these days you can find somewhere to get online without even paying for data.

RLOU30 · 10/12/2019 22:22

*left off

DorothyParkersCat · 10/12/2019 22:24

He got back to me today saying he's just got back from India. At the time we last messaged, his aunt past away and he dropped everything and went there. Didn't have roaming on his phone where he went which is understandable. His aunt used to live in UK and was major part of his life, mentioned her alot so I know he's telling the truth. We'll see what happens....

Did you know the OED have taken the word gullible out of the dictionary?

bluebell34567 · 10/12/2019 22:29

so, he never had a chance to tell you he is leaving?

Notcoolmum · 10/12/2019 22:30

Obviously this could be true @AL75 but do remember you don't know anything. You don't know about his auntie or anything. As you've not met him. You are believing what he has told you. Which might be true. But you have no way of knowing this so far.

forumdonkey · 10/12/2019 22:31

No WiFi in the entirety of his trip either?

Swirlygirl · 10/12/2019 22:33

AL75 I’ve just read the thread.

He’s lying to you. He could have rang you at any point. They do have pay phones in India.

I bloke I used to see off OLD used to say stuff like this all the time.

Ask to FaceTime him.

Swirlygirl · 10/12/2019 22:37

Ask him where about in India?
What time was his flight?
Who did he fly with?
How long did it take to get there?
Did he take any pictures of his family?

I’ve been where you are and I bet you do t want to ask a single question because you know deep down he his lying and you do t want to scare him off

afterme · 10/12/2019 22:43

Are you going to arrange to meet?

RLOU30 · 10/12/2019 22:44

OP hasn’t even met this man she can’t start asking him the time of his flight and company he flew with then she really would be ghosted (for good this time)! actually...yes ask him will do you a favour

whatalovelytub · 10/12/2019 22:45

I've spent a fair amount of time in India, rural, urban and all kinds of places in-between. They have WiFi everywhere! India as a country is extremely forward looking when it comes to tech. Also 4G everywhere.

Talkingmouse · 10/12/2019 22:45

‘ Ask to FaceTime him.’

This.

At the very least take all the advice given and try and flush him out before you waste more of your time.

You just know he is BSing you.