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Original poster

Dating Thread 175 - It's not you, it's them. Also: people are weird at Christmas time.

999 replies

MoreNiceCereal · 26/11/2019 23:36

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. Know your worth.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

**

Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

OP posts:
bangheadhere40 · 01/12/2019 21:11

I am lonely too, hard isn't it ☹ xxx

bangheadhere40 · 01/12/2019 21:11

But like my own space

Jane1978xx · 01/12/2019 21:20

When I’m
Child free I do the food shopping and tidying and all house stuff and errands so when my daugher is here I’m 100% free

Menora · 01/12/2019 21:22

I’m never child free but they are teens

I am not as bored as I could be. I don’t know why

TimeTravellingDiamond · 01/12/2019 21:22

That's the worst thing, when they cancel. Really frustrating and unfair.

Incidentally yesterday's cancelled date hasn't messaged. I unmatched him on tinder and might block him on Snapchat too.

Original poster
MoreNiceCereal · 01/12/2019 21:35

On my very first OLD date, he didn't show! I waited for him for a while, he didn't answer messages, so I blocked him. Ugh.

I've been ghosted a few times after the first date too, which is also shitty.

But yeah - first time out of the gate and stood up! What a world.

OP posts:
TimeTravellingDiamond · 01/12/2019 21:42

@MoreNiceCereal that's rubbish, first date and stood up!

I don't think I've been ghosted after first date but tbh I've lost track of it all!

Original poster
MoreNiceCereal · 01/12/2019 21:46

Yeah I should have been keeping better track of things too; dating is just weird. There might have been a book in there somewhere!

Luckily for me I'm pretty strong-willed stubborn and didn't let it get me down for long. I'd actually forgotten all about it til just now.

OP posts:
Jane1978xx · 01/12/2019 22:55

Just had an hour long WhatsApp convo with mr gray he’s very honest but we are on the same page with everything. It’s odd how someone I’ve only met for a few hours has had a big impression on me.

crazycatlady20 · 01/12/2019 23:37

@Jane1978xx ooh sounds really good. do u mind me asking what kind of things ur on the same page about?

Jane1978xx · 01/12/2019 23:41

Sex stuff , what we are looking for, Sex / friendship / relationship and how that works, honesty and communication - like always be honest and say what you want but if the other person doesn’t want the same that’s ok and no judgment.

UtterSocks · 02/12/2019 00:11

So update, Mr Personality has some health issues which I knew about from yesterday and wants to put us on pause but sent a lovely message. There’s a hope we can get back in touch at a later stage. Feel wistful but respect him for his decision. Shame though..

Got a new iron Mr Media. He’s funny but looks familiar... we work in the same industry and have a nagging feeling we’ve met...

To all of you who feel lonely, I get the Christmas sadness. Ex took DD to a Christmas event I would have loved to go to with his new GF and I was quietly livid cos he never came with us when I did those things when they were little. So I feel sad it’s a single mum Xmas but actually he was a miserable git anyway and now I can visit people over Xmas that he didn’t like (basically anybody I did like) Though the wanker wants to spend Xmas day with us instead of his gf and I really don’t want him here...

Anyway I digress. Still catching up on the thread 174. I’m never taking a week off from here again, it took me less time to read Middlemarch ...

Jane1978xx · 02/12/2019 00:25

@crazycatlady20 maybe this is just how adults communicate and I’ve been missing out for years being married to a man who refers to his penis as a winky 😂😂

UtterSocks · 02/12/2019 00:46

Winky????? 🤮

Jane1978xx · 02/12/2019 00:49

Yes 😂 at 40

Azzizam · 02/12/2019 05:38

Two ghosters reappeared this weekend. "Long time, no chat how you been" from one and "Hope all is well" from one I mentioned that had completely ignored my message after us being together five times.

Oh the satisfaction of returning the radio silence. Deep satisfaction. Just keep wanking lads. This woman has found her self worth and you just don't merit a stroke of even her keyboard!

Chocolate123 · 02/12/2019 07:28

I always found that ghosters always appeared this time of the year. Yeah right not going to give them the opportunity to do that again. As you said @Azzizam silence in return is the best feeling. They probably send that message to all their contacts from the world of dates in a hope to get a reply from someone. Next !!

TigerDater · 02/12/2019 07:39

Just keeping wanking lads! 😂

Thanks for everyone’s kind words about my dog, it meant a lot. My XH is here to share her final hours. He’s pretty irritating but actually it feels right. Above all she was the family dog. Here goes!

TimeTravellingDiamond · 02/12/2019 07:54

@Chocolate123 yeah they do seem to reappear, I couldn't believe someone actually phoning my work to try and get hold of me! Freaked me out a bit.

@TigerDater 💐 take care of yourself today

Jane1978xx · 02/12/2019 07:57

Thoughts are with you @TigerDater.

My very ex bf From 20 years ago has started messaging me. I still would etc 🤢

BatshitCrazyWoman · 02/12/2019 07:57

Tiger I'm so sorry about your dog Flowers

Original poster
MoreNiceCereal · 02/12/2019 08:00

Love it, @Azzizam!! Rule 7 in action right there.

OP posts:
Azzizam · 02/12/2019 08:38

Cereal Smile I actually have these losers to thank for it. Lol

bangheadhere40 · 02/12/2019 08:44

Need advice ladies! The situation with me straight is he does like me, but the distance is an issue for him, I accept that. I told him I accept that, it's a shame but I certainly dont take it personally.

He still wants to talk to me, ok I can handle it. He has asked I please dont tell him if I start talking to anyone else as he would rather be oblivious as it would hurt too much. He says he wants me to be happy but it would upset him.

If he does like me he's hurting himself more by not meeting me. Unless he is of the mindset I don't want you but I don't want anyone else to have you, an ego boost etc. I can't tell at all.

Azzizam · 02/12/2019 08:50

It all sounds way too heavy for someone you've never met bang. Knock the angst on the head and take a massive step back. He needs to be last on the bench of your focus. It will all become clear in time. ☺

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