Dating Thread 175 - It's not you, it's them. Also: people are weird at Christmas time.

[MoreNiceCereal]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

I’m so sorry @TigerDater I hope you’re okay, is there anyone who can go with you tomorrow?

I cancelled tonight with mr Young.. just felt the age gap too much (8years) as he just came across quite immature. Arranged a coffee date with another iron but not heard from him today, so think that’s gone... I texted him just asking how his day was and no reply as yet.
If he’s keen make the effort, if not I’ll just leave it.

I have another 2 irons but none blowing me away...Hello December 🙄

Oh tiger I'm so sorry. Losing a dog is heartbreaking and this bit, knowing it's going to happen is so hard. You know you're doing the right thing. And that is an incredible age for a retriever. Sending lots of love

Sorry for your loss, Tiger.

So sorry @TigerDater, that's so sad. Hope you're doing ok x

The vets coming here. It’s just going to be me snd the two dogs, so I don’t have to deal with other people’s feelings

So sort of semi serious question. In this modern date world if it’s obvious Your next meeting with an iron is to be overnight do you mention about any requirement for this ? E.g just a quick check they are on the same page re safe sex etc. I’m kind of hoping it’s obvious but I feel like I should mention it. What’s people’s general approach or do you carry you own supplies and tackle it at the time.

@Jane1978xx I think it depends with different people, if you take your own with you anyway then shouldn't be an issue? I've never had problems with guys making a fuss or refusing to use condoms

Jane1978xx I would make sure I have my own but I would expect him to as well. If he didn’t nor didn’t ask if I did, e.g tried without then I’d be showing him the door.

Would you mention it before ? And yes any refusal I’d be out the door (or they would)

TigerDater sorry to hear about your dog. Dogs are such wonderful and loyal animals.

This is a new one for me.
I was dithering about whether or not to meet Mr 8 years older again. But I decided to meet for a proper date, not a 5min quick chat.

Except he's decided that he doesn't want to meet me. He said that after meeting me he realised he was punching above his weight. That I'm too beautiful to be with him and deserve someone more suitable.

I told him that I didn't see it like that. But he still said no.

Aww he sounds lovely or maybe he’s just pushing for compliments?

He sounds like he's trying to get out of seeing you without making you feel bad OR has serious self esteem issues. I wouldn't if i were you. What hard work!

So... no loo update from Mr fast work (sorry) because it was short but sweet after being interrupted by stbx Calif and asking me to come get the kids because he wasn't well enough (only for him to then be well enough to bend my ear trying to rehash the bloody relationship for nearly an hour. I'd much rather have been on my date)

Anyway. Mr fast work was very cute. Lovely smile. He giggles when genuinely amused. Lots of chemistry. A fairly chaste but promising kiss in the carpark and a second date arranged for Wednesday...

Trying not to bombard him with messages or keep grinning like a loon.

@nomoreweepingandwanking. Your ex sounds like mine 😂. I told mine I was on a date Friday (I was with the girls ;-)). Then 8 am he messaged he needs to come with dd to get some stuff 😆. Glad the date went well - I’m still grinning like an idiot from last Thursday 😂

Coffee date for tonight texted back around 4, didn’t mention coffee, then about half an hour later to say if I’m too busy next week would be easer.
At no point did I suggest I’m too busy so I’m assuming it’s him. Just not sure how to respond.

@Jane1978xx I wouldn’t mention it but I’d expect him to be prepared. Even if you also are.

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking yey!! That does sound promising!

Jane...
I have pointed out that I'm not on birth contril and it's usually greeted with a horrified "but condoms!" So fear not. Modern man uses barriers.

God i got proper fanny gallops from that kiss. Hope i get another on Weds. Pray for me that i don't catch this disgusting cold off DD/stbx

I have a date planned for next Sunday. He suggested a dog walk. We seem to have a similar sense of humour and I like his photos. There are no buts. So far.

I'll call him Mr Marks. Let's hope he doesn't cancel. A week is a long time in online dating.

I can’t take the pill or anything hormonal as I had this stupid blood clot thing a few years ago 😔. But you don’t know whose got what or their history 🤷🏼‍♀️

does anyone else get really bored? I have books I can read, tv progs I can watch, prob housework to do but I just dont have the oomph or concentration to do it.

I just wanna chat to someone, watch crap tv with someone, I can see the xmas period far enough 😔. trying not to piss off mr builder 😫

@crazycatlady20 yes that's me! I spend my life on my phone, it's ridiculous. Swiping or on mnet or whatever, checking for messages. I'm bored and lonely

@TimeTravellingDiamond I'm glad it's just not me. do u wanna chat?

I know ur supposed to feel comfortable single before u consider dating (and in ways i am) but urgh I just want someone to love especially when the little one is in bed.

I've gotten so used to swiping recently, but have hidden my profiles and I'm missing it. I dont want to go back on yet cos of mr builder but feeling bored. he isnt well and doing other things tonight which is putting me on edge. stupid I know.

@crazycatlady20 I feel the same, for me it's the childfree weekends when I feel most lonely. Thing is I like my own space too so I don't know how it would work if I actually met someone I liked!

@TimeTravellingDiamond I dont get too many of them, which is hindering my dating lol. it's a pain when I do tho and dates cancel etc. I rattle around the house with loads of plans but do nothing.