He won't accept we're separated

[cece]

We split nearly three months ago after I found out about an inappropriate relationship with another woman. It's not the first time and I said if it happened again we'd split. So we have.

However, he's still messaging me daily to ask me to talk about saving our marriage. I've told him repeatedly I don't want to talk about this as it's over. I feel trapped. He's just not listening to me.

Thanks. I'm resigned to the fact he's not going to be reasonable.

He's definitely worried about financials as it was one of the things in our marriage that was controlling. He considered his money his money and considered himself generous for paying for family/house stuff.

He currently thinks he's overpaying child maintenance when in fact he's underpaying. He won't have it that I'm right. 🙄

Preferred response to his pathetic email: "Boo fucking hoo!"

Wise response to his email:

I can not believe he’s still acting surprised by all this and STILL trying to get you back!

Have you gone through cms for the maintenance ? They will make him pay the correct amount.

It's complicated but he's not actually giving me the whole cm. he's insisted he gives it to me by paying the mortgage. 🙄

I would open a claim for maintenance. Could you afford the mortgage without him paying it?

Role on the CMS getting involved!!!

It's probably all about the money sadly

Screw That because when it comes to spiriting assets he will
Claim for the payments he made since he left...

CMS all the way!!

Christ he really doesn't listen to a word you say does he? In one ear and out the other. Words from you are an irrelevance.

What does the solicitor say about CM, mortgage and all his refusal to take his things to his place?

I can't believe this man, he is trying to goad you into staying matured or something. Just bonkers.

Stay strong op.

You're all so right. He constantly reminds me why I don't want to go back to him!

Are you inching any further forward? Are you going to force sale of the house are are you wanting to stay in it?

No news yet. I've started to gather information for my Form E. busy sorting out an appeal for ds2 secondary school place this weekend.

I've had a couple of messages from him about how he's missing us all and so unhappy. 🙄

🙄 indeed but zero effort to actually parent the DC I suspect?

You doing all the work for the appeal? I hope it goes well, do you have evidence that you have a high chance of success?

I just read your thread (with my jaw on the floor!). What an absolute dick! I had to keep taking breaks reading it as I was beyond furious on your behalf. You are dealing with all of this amazingly. I really hope things get sorted for you soon. He is a nightmare!

Take care of yourself

Of course I'm doing all the work for the appeal....

I asked to talk to him about it but apparently he couldn't stay as he just felt like crying. 🙄

He keeps saying he'll do anything to save our marriage but I haven't seen one shred of evidence of it! Not that I'm interested in saving it. I love my new life. 😍

Financially is it worth him living or can I just resort to planning your new patio??

What a pathetic specimen!

Of course I'm doing all the work for the appeal....

Why? Is this part of a 'smoke screen' for your leaving or will it benefit you in some way? Because otherwise I'd just let that ride and let him crash and burn on his own.

@AcrossthePond55 it's an appeal for her sons place at a secondary school that best suits his SEN needs.

OOPS! I was thinking of a different thread.

Sorry OP. Carry on!

Yes, the appeal is about son's school and not the divorce!

@cece Hope the solicitor is sorting it all for you :)

I haven't heard anything from solicitor since she wrote the letter to him. It must be two weeks now, so will probably need to chase it up. This week I have been sorting SEND appeal for son's school place. I finished that about an hour ago and sent it off. My brain is now fried.

Good luck with the school