He won't accept we're separated

[cece]

We split nearly three months ago after I found out about an inappropriate relationship with another woman. It's not the first time and I said if it happened again we'd split. So we have.

However, he's still messaging me daily to ask me to talk about saving our marriage. I've told him repeatedly I don't want to talk about this as it's over. I feel trapped. He's just not listening to me.

Just pay the fee, get him served.
hope his days WFH are no longer at your home

@mix56 no they're at his place.

I've informed divorce service of his new address. If he doesn't respond again then apparently as I have an email saying he'd received the petition then that's enough proof. So hoping I won't need to pay for a process server.

I told you weeks ago I could have come help you build a new patio 🤷🏽‍♀️

He's probably buying time to try and hide his finances better or just being bloody minded thinking you'll beg him to come home...

Well he's not going to make it easy is he?
He is so self centred he could implode

There was a valentines card posted through my letterbox from him today. He'll love me forever. It sounds like a threat 😱

🙄🤮

He really thinks he can persuade you to change your mind...

There seems to be so many of these financially tight, parenting reluctant men that seem utterly shocked they aren't considered some unbelievable catch.

Another late night message about how much he loves and misses me.

🤮

Next time you have to message him about the DC tell him to have some self respect and accept it's over due to his behaviour.

Ignore his gestures. Responding fuels the fire.

Get those papers served as soon as you possibly can.

Omg I'm away with kids. He's just asked to come to use the treadmill in the house. I said no as we were out. He's said I'll come anyway. 😡

@cece

'There was a valentines card posted through my letterbox from him today. He'll love me forever. It sounds like a threat 😱'

I thought it was just me!!! My ex writes theses loving heartfelt sorry letters and I swear they are threats. It makes me feel like he is never going to leave me in peace.
I know now that he doesn't actually feel this love, because he's sexting and dating others at the same time which is why it's scary.

I will love your forever or I will never let you go! It's not cute!

Op just thinking your self a little lucky that he's not coming to mumsnet to write posts like mind has.

I feel for you so much though because mind isn't allowed to contact me, even though he's finding loop holes, so I have managed to avoid at this time a lot of what your going through.

As he now has another tenancy I was told you can change the locks. He lives somewhere else. He can’t come and go as he pleases.
Change them.
Well done for getting him out.

Leave the front door locked with a chain on and use the back door

I've been told I can't legally change the locks as he still jointly owns the house.

😒

@FraglesRock that's exactly what I should have done!

Well you know from now on to do that...

@RandomMess yes absolutely!!

And feign no knowledge when he asks we he can't get the door open

If you were to lose your keys, you'd have to change the locks...

Ok my neighbour has very kindly looked to see if his car is on my drive. It is. I'm so angry!!

I've been seperated 1 yr 6 months and he wont accept it. It's hideous. I feel traumatised every time he suggests reconciliation. It breaks my heart all over again, saying no I'm done. He's confusing my eldest by getting him to beg me too and it's so manipulative and unfair.
I dont want to reconcile now he's learnt his lesson - he refused to believe i wouldnt tolerate his dv, lies, online chats forever. So he doesnt want me back does he, he wants to be with his kids and back in the home. He had all that before, but threw it away with his choice of behaviour ahhhh i cant. Sorry to derail your thread. But i know how exhausting it can be, you have my sympathies

Ask your neighbour to listen out for any banging etc. Wouldn't put it past him to put camera's up to watch you.

Will the treadmill show if someone has used it?