He won't accept we're separated

[cece]

We split nearly three months ago after I found out about an inappropriate relationship with another woman. It's not the first time and I said if it happened again we'd split. So we have.

However, he's still messaging me daily to ask me to talk about saving our marriage. I've told him repeatedly I don't want to talk about this as it's over. I feel trapped. He's just not listening to me.

Don't worry I plan to bag it up and give it to him to deal with. Not my job anymore.

He's had dc in his new flat this weekend. But he's messaged me as he wants to send them home early. Now he's questioning why I can't fetch them and I said he could drop them back at 3.

"No, I have plans"

In the meantime I've had messages over the weekend about how sad he is, how sorry he is and how much he loves me 🙄

Honestly can you block him?

Love how he's gone from insisting 50:50 to not wanting his full weekend so predictable. I think he though moving out would panic you into wanting to reconcile!

What Random said^^

Begin as you mean to go on, otherwise you'll find yourself doing all pick ups/drop offs and adjusting your life to his schedule. You do NOT want to make that rod for your back!

"Not home until 5pm"

Ha ha, I have had exactly this too. Yesterday stbxh had kids for 6 hours before saying 4 yo son was grumpy and wanted to come home. So predictable indeed. Like @AcrossthePond55 warned about, at the moment I really feel like I am dancing to his tune as we haven't solidified our parenting plan with lawyers yet (in the works) so his parenting time is happening to his convenience to some extent. I intend to make it much more structured when I work with my lawyer so that stbxh doesn't get to be dedicated father when he finds it convenient.

@cece, hopefully the sad puppy messages from your ex will tail off soon. Mine has already found a new -victim- girlfriend so I am not being used as emotional supply nearly as much. Within about 6 weeks of his heartbroken departure.

I'm hopeful he'll move on. He's on several dating apps so fingers crossed!!

Yeah, he'll DEFINITELY manage them 50/50 care (!)

In regards to contact, you need to stay firm and not let him return them early. You need your time to create your own life and to recharge

I've emailed him to ask about what dates he wants for summer holidays. I also pointed out he shouldn't be organising events on his weekend with kids and expect me to look after them.

Apparently I am being adversarial. 🙄

@cece nothing really tonadd to this thread except that I'm in a very very similar situation (down to 3dc one with sen!). I'm a bit further down the line than you. Just wanted to say chin up, thinking of you and well done stay strong xx

Your children
Your contact
Your house
Your responsibility.

reply to him obvs.

FFS he's not signed the divorce petition before the deadline 😡

Well erm no.... totally predictable

What's the next step then.
Stop replying to him. What a tosser

I've got to reserve papers and then get advice on what to do 🤬

Grr

I think you need proof of getting them served this time

@RandomMess I think I do...

So annoying

He is ensuring any respect you still had is well and truly gone!!!

Would it be easy to get him served at work?

He works from home at least one or two days a week