Dating thread 174 - where we remind everyone of rule no.13

[NoMoreWeepingAndWanking]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

'Him' being Mr Ad, obvs!

@unambiguousbeard Yeah, I’m in North London

So Wednesday is on for a drink with mr gray who I matched with on Pof and he sent me a message saying as you live nearby and look normal let’s go for a drink 😂. Which now I’ve chatted to him is just his sense of humour. His profile pics are that bad I can’t work out if they are supposed to be ironic or not. Like I can see he’s good looking (to me) but they are just the most random pics ever

@unambiguous, he probably lives in my town! Hope it's not my ex!

Birmingham works for me

@unambiguous and that's for your sake!

I strongly suspect we have different taste @bangheadhere40 I may or may not be a wild swimmer into hiking.

So what's with all the guys 10 years or more my junior wanting to meet? I don't look my age admittedly but why so many? Is it a thing? Should I even bother with them?

@unambiguousbeard. It’s a thing I’ve had lot ask me. I think some men like older women generally but for others I think they know older women may want a fb 🤷🏼‍♀️. I nearly met up with one whose profile said he was 7 years younger than me but it turned out he was even younger than that.

All the men I'm chatting to are under 40 and foreign. And bearded. Now clearly I like foreign men with beards but I'd prefer a 40 something to a 30 something. I don't mind a FB really. As long as we're nice to each other.

Maybe all the 30 somethings want kids? But I know that's not true as there's loads of you on here!

Ah Mr Lakes is bearded and 50 plus. He's fast becoming my William

I get a lot of messages from younger guys, I’m almost 38, I did have a FWB last year with a guy who was 26, he wasn’t great tbh. I think younger guys like an experienced women to show them what to do.

Well they're late 30s. Surely they should know what to do! I was in a sexless marriage for 12 years so I'm not teaching anyone!

Definitely a thing. Milf hunters, I call them. Not for me.

I've found that with my FWB, tbh he's really good but always says about wanting me to teach him stuff. I don't think I need to!

I think my age rang on tinder is 22-38. I swipe right for plenty of older guys but seem to match much more often with the younger ones...

Yeah but @MoreNiceCereal the 50 plus are just awful

Fuck it. I'm getting comfy on the cougar bench

Hello all. Am enjoying life on the solo bench at the mo, and all the extra time from not dating too. Glad you all seem well.

Re the age thing I always set up with filters so younger men couldn't contact me. I have no interest in being a cougar.

You do you!

It's interesting to consider the demographics at play here. Younger men are happy to casually date older women and presumably those in their age bracket as well, but older men aren't swiping on women in their own age bracket? What is their thinking, I wonder.

The biggest age gap I've dated was a coffee with a man 10/11 years older. He was definitely a lot more staid than I prefer in a date, but that doesn't necessarily come down to age. Mr G is 7 years older than me but I don't notice it at all. Probably helps that we have DC similar ages so we are in similar life stages, really. I prefer older men, overall, though obviously it's more down to personality than anything else. (Within reason - I'd say about 8-ish years either side of my 38, personally)

Accidentally reactivated v old profile on fab. That's the danger with coming on here Mr Muscle is new iron. Will meet sometime for a drink. Oops haha

There’s a lot with fake ages like it will say 35 then In their bio say oops wrong age I’m 27 😬. It depends a lot on personality and what someone has done in life as well as just age

Question for you wise ladies, I'm waiting for Mr E in my favourite bar and I've just bumped into an old iron who ghosted me but text me to apologise last week (I ignored text). Today he said he found out last month that his mum is seriously ill and that's why he ghosted. Do I believe him? Does it matter? I think I see all OLD men as liars and have lost all trust!

Mr Train has just left. Oh dear. Nice, decent man but soooo boring. No SOH at all. How I didn’t spot this on the first three dates I don’t know, I think I was distracted by nice food in decent restaurants. Sigh.

Re men in their 50s. I’ve matched with loads as my age range is 47-60. They may well be treading water with me while looking for someone younger, but I don’t think so. I think they enjoy having the same cultural references eg reciting Monty Python sketches together. Who knows?

Back to the drawing board I go...

I wouldn’t give it a second thought to be honest.

@TigerDater. Shame on mr train esp if he was a nice guy