Dating thread 174 - where we remind everyone of rule no.13

[NoMoreWeepingAndWanking]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@unambiguousbeard clearly a type there 😂

I have 106 tinder matches. Bloody ridiculous that I've not had a proper conversation with any of them

TimeTravellingDiamond 106 tinder matches!! How??
I'm lucky if I get more than 5.

Thanks for the comments about FWB.
I haven't come across any like that on Tinder or POF. Either they want a relationship or just a one off hookup.

I struggle with lack of time because I only get one childfree day/evening every fortnight. Which makes dating tricky but not impossible.
And I thought a FWB would give me the friends and sex bit without all the other issues of a relationship. If only I could find someone suitable.

That's going back to September... ridiculous though

I know this is going against all the rules but I'm proper into Mr Straight, we chat all day, and I'm a bit loved up with someone I've never met, or even spoke to.

It's quite crazy really but I'm going with it for now 😐

Something about him, I could of course be proved wrong, but for now I'm liking it and we may meet next month. I don't even know his surname so can't refer to him as Mr anything 😅 weird as hell, and not like me at all.

Oh shit! Seems to be ex problems, spoke too soon.

@bangheadhere40 that’s how I was with mr Friday then I met him and he wasn’t like I excepted. Then he was cagey about meeting again Althou he claimed to really like me. So I’d just keep an open mind. I don’t know if they draw you in on purpose or it is mutual but it didn’t work for me.

So my last 3 weeks of seeing mr fit have been very intense. He messages me from work all day and we video chat a few times a day. We have established that we both “really like” eachother but I am falling for him hard and fast.
I think he feels the same. However, I don’t want to be the one to say something in case he freaks out. Is it normal to fall in love after just 3 weeks? I feel sick, have butterflies, have lost my appetite ( and I’m a greedy cow ) and just feel on top of the world.
Still living with my ex which is awkward but we have lived separate lives for the last 2 years anyway. I don’t talk about new man.

Having been in such a long relationship ( almost 12 years ) it’s scary starting out again but I feels so bloody right. He’s talking about the future as am I. He even told me today he would love another baby which has freaked me out as I’m 41 and he’s 43 and we have 2 kids each.

Help!

How many times have you met in person in those 3 weeks ?

It’s odd everyone on old or irons go quiet on a Friday , it must be date night 😂. I’d be out thou if my daughter wasn’t here

I've got a few chatty ones.
So tired though. Just waiting for my fucking kids to crash so I can.

Is it normal to fall in love after just 3 weeks? I feel sick, have butterflies, have lost my appetite ( and I’m a greedy cow ) and just feel on top of the world.

It's normal in the sense that this phase of attraction produces those feelings in most people, but it's driven by your biochemistry. That's not to say that he's not bloodly lovely and perfect for you, but have a bit of caution with it. This will clarify what I'm referring to. Dr. Fisher is an academic who researches in this area.

I feel like I'm actually a better person when taking to Mr Straight, even with his baggage.

That says a lot as I am normally a bit of a selfish bitch sometimes 😅

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking how old are your kids ? My 9 year old is in my bed just so I can have some peace 😂

@Zoflorabore It’s lust and being in love with the idea of him (as of course, after three weeks we don’t know someone enough to love them).

@bangheadhere40 have you spoke to him on the phone ( this is just the advice I wish I’d listened to 😂).

@Zoflorabore I hope this doesn't sound too weird but I think there is something in the stars at the moment. I have seen a few similar posts over the last few weeks- and I am feeling the same with my new man and it's absolutely wonderful.

I think we should enjoy it to the max!

An update from me because I posted last Friday I was on a date with my new man and he stayed over but it was really awkward between us until the lights went out 😳

But I really like him, I'm trying to stay calm and enjoy the moment. We've both got kids and we're not seeing each other very often, which made me feel frustrated this week. He is amazing at keeping it going through and my feelings keep on growing.

@Jane no, no phone! Don't even know his number.

Thanks Jane for giving me a reality check, I mean that 😘

Proceed with caution, my loved-up comrades! Hormones are powerful and I really don't think you can discover the true character of a person in a short space of time. Enjoy it, but be careful.

(She says, eyeing her own life with a bit of sardonic side-eye...)

Good evening
I need to catch up !
Please can I quickly ask an opinion?
My ex was a liar - and then he would make me feel bad for finding out the lies and/or try to turn it round on me. This has left me feeling vulnerable at times about honesty.
I have been chatting to a lovely man, he works in the military, I am not sure in what role, he lives about 90 mins away from me.
He asked me out for dinner tomorrow night, I agreed and we we messaging when he told me that he had a lie on his profile, it was the only lie he would ever tell me - that he actually lived in xxxxxxxxx, basically it's the same distance but just about 30 miles East.
I told him my non negotiable was truth and honesty.
He explained the reason as that he hates being on the app and small town gossip, then that he was sure I would understand if he explained it to me in person.
Am I knee jerk reacting? It makes me vey wary that he lied ..?
Thanks

@bangheadhere40. My advise ask to add him on whatapp , there will be a pic on there and you also put the number in fb for a nosey.

I am now being more laid back and not reading into every detail.

@sofa, makes me think he some baggage /ex/not ex, I would be wary, sorry.

Thank you @bang , I was not sure if I was just being too cautious.

@Undecidedsofa. It might be ok he just seems to be over complicating 🤷🏼‍♀️.

Thanks Jane, I don't think I need overcomplicating, either!