Dating thread 174 - where we remind everyone of rule no.13

[NoMoreWeepingAndWanking]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item.

@shitwithsugaron. He does it all the time , I think he knew I was going out as I doubled checked what time he was coming.

@Jane1978xx I think that was for me!

I know it's no comfort now buy your dd will know when she's older that her dad kept letting her down and you were her stability.

Maybe it's time to talk to your ex about going down the legal route re: access though if he can't stick to an agreement on a regular basis.

@Jane, can you ask a friend? Maybe the one you baby sat for last week?

@shit..congrats on the exam results, you sound much more than competent x

MrStraight I like a lot, crazy I know as we've just chatted online. He wants to meet someone nearby....I'm too far 😐

Is it pointless for carrying on the conversation?

The more I speak the more I like him, and he's just my type. 😓

@bangheadhere40 how far away is he? If it's too far to work I'd knock it on the head now

2 hours, and he has young children most of the time at his.

I think I'm going to have to, am getting way too emotionally invested in our chats.

He is clear he wants to meet someone local, but then says he really likes me, so it's all a bit confusing. If he was that interested he would ask to meet anyway I guess 😓

Which is wrong as I've done OLD before, and I know you can't judge properly until you meet.

Sorry for going on x

It really depends on if he's willing to meet you halfway, both literally and figuratively.

I'm very early into a LDR and we both want to make it work so we are figuring it out, one day at a time.

@cereal, I don't think he is. He says a LDR would be too difficult.

How far are you away?

Ah, well in that case it's probably best to move on.

Mr G lives in America haha. He comes over here for work every few weeks/ months depending on the project. We last saw each other on 1 November when he flew back, and are making plans for December. He's waiting on his boss to confirm a work trip but if it isn't on the cards he will be flying out here himself. (He has lots of air miles from travelling back and forth over the years)

Long term is murky but I'm also American and can conceivably move out there tomorrow if I wanted to, though that's unrealistic obviously. We are both smitten and it's been really great so far. We'll see.

@sounds do able with MrAmerica, especially if you can move.

I would be open to a LDR, but I think he's more sensible than me and I don't want to make him meet me, I want him to want to.

banghead - it's also a case of them wanting to make it wotk. If everything is perfect but they're just not prepared to put in yhe necessary effort then it's not petfevt and you'd do better to stick a pin in it. This is the decision i had to come to with Mr Beard and it's disappointing I know, but you don't want to be more committed than them or making more effort.

Thanks @weeping, and I will try to stick my tits out a bit more today 😅

@shitwithsugaron well done for passing your mock. Glad Mr B is making more of an effort.

@bangheadhere40 I would give you the same advice I think I gave to @NoMoreWeepingAndWanking which is to block him. I actually think it's really shitty for these guys to use you for conversation and flirting while saying it's not going to lead anywhere. If you knew someone liked you would you keep stringing them along?

As soon as they meet someone more local they're most likely to drop you like a stone. I got quite attached to the guy before Mr R and missed the attention when he ended it so I do know what it's like.

Sorry that's blunter than I am usually but there are guys like William out there waiting for you.

Yep. Rule #7. Mr G made his feelings and determination known pretty early on; I tried to end it actually, not wanting to get attached to someone who couldn't commit to me, and he was gracious but a few hours later came back to me to say he wanted something serious. So here we are.

@thanks stealth, I need honesty, not getting carried away right now. I could see it going that way tbf and that would hurt.

I agree if he was willing to make it work it would be ok, but I'm obviously just someone to pass the time.

Who is William 😅

@bangheadhere40 William is @NoMoreWeepingAndWanking's awesome imaginary boyfriend from a few threads ago. I think he's a very good looking (but doesn't know it), sensitive, architect who can chat on a wide range of subjects and is thoughtful and attentive.

@bangheadhere40. I could at a real push but it’s too much disruption on a school night , my daughters 9 and she’d play up 😂.

Your situation is hard as distance is always going to be an issue. You can either Knock it on the head or try and meet once and see if it’s worth the effort

He sound perfect, I may get a William myself.

@Jane I would meet,but I don't think he wants to, so I'm not going to push.