Dating thread 173 - Winter is coming - 'cuffing' is optional

[CodLiverOil556]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread.
11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated
12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with
13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item. 😘

[saltysally]

Wow @morenicecereal what a story. Glad the dc and him are doing okay

[MoreNiceCereal]

Thanks, @saltysally. He's a good man, committed to his family. They've been through a lot.

[Horses4]

Jumping back in after an almost three year dating hiatus and five years single. Chatting via text (from Tinder) with a good potential iron, let’s call him Curly. Loose plans to meet but he has uni and (high level) sporting commitments in the near future... Feeling a bit fizzy about this one so need support

[saltysally]

Seeing Mr Camera during the week instead. He needed (not really needed just a bit of poor planning) to reschedule but immediately tried new times and dates including slightly later tonight so he has a pass this time. I'm also quite glad as I wasnt in the mood anyhow.

[saltysally]

@morenicecereal sure sounds it. Glad you are giving this a chance x

[CodLiverOil556]

Really lovely date with MrM last night - I think the L-bomb is incoming and I'm ready for it and absolutely ready to say it back and mean it. He has captured my whole being and is very genuine and lovely. What a soppy sod I am but I believe I've found my soulmate after 41 years on this earth - and whoever said 'when you know, you know' indeed you do and we're both on the same page for everything!

Wow, I never thought I'd find him on Tinder as I didn't want to touch it with a barge pole but I'm so very glad I did! Tinder does seem to have quite a lot of success on here too!

[eyebrowsofinstagram]

Ok on my way to a big date with an as yet unnamed iron. (I'm really superstitious)
Woke up this morning feeling really excited so hopefully that's a good sign. Got good outfit and makeup on - I'm all set!

Please wish me luck and I'll report back later 🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞🤞

[CodLiverOil556]

Good luck @eyebrowsofinstagram hope it's a great date!!

[eyebrowsofinstagram]

Thanks @KermitRulesOK - suddenly starting to panic now 🙈🙈🙈

[CodLiverOil556]

@eyebrowsofinstagram just be yourself, eye contact and don't get drunk!!

[eyebrowsofinstagram]

Getting drunk is usually my plan!!!
Good one on the eye contact

Thanks!

[Horses4]

Good luck @eyebrowsofinstagram Curly and I have decided to meet up next weekend as he is away at a competition after that. Suddenly very terrified. There has been a lot of chat and bonding over the last couple of weeks and now it’s a bit too real. I am so out of practise!

[eyebrowsofinstagram]

Thanks @Horses4 have you met in person yet?

I'm soooo nervous. Had loads of nice chat for 3 weeks now finally meeting- and I'm here first waiting for him

[Peanutbuttermouth]

After last night's ordeal, meet first bond later would be my advice 🤣

[Horses4]

Oh no @peanutbuttermouth, just read your post! It is a gamble that you mentally invest and then it’s a disaster!

@eyebrowsofinstagram No, we haven’t met yet, same as you, a couple of weeks of daily chat, then a “let’s bite the bullet and have a date next week” chat. So hope yours is going well!

[CoronelChestnut]

Hello, I wondered if I might join this thread as could really use some advice on dating and the majority of my friends are either in relationships or not OLD. I apologise if this is not the right thread for this and please do point me in the right direction,

I started OLD about 18 months again and had some fantastically awful first dates along with being ghosted etc. I met Mr Wallet a year ago - he is very sweet and lovely but he is from a different country and we have completely different cultures and nothing really in common from childhood that we can bond over. We see each other once a week - only on Saturdays, he never spends the night and won't commit to seeing me at any other time of the week as he gets too tired from work, which we all do so that really annoys me.

I have tried to break it off a couple of times but somehow we drift back together I suppose becuase its easy and comfortable. He has just left to go back to home for 6 weeks and I think that I should use the time when he is gone to think about whether I want to carry on pursuing this relationship or just cut the ties, take a deep breath and plunge back into OLD.

Sorry this is such a long and rambling post but any advice would be gratefully received!

[StealthNinjaMum]

@CoronelChestnut are you sure he's not just using you for sex? That sounds awful. I don't spend that many nights with Mr R because my ex doesn't have dc over very often but when I do I love the intimacy of being kept awake by his snoring sleeping in his bed and being brought tea in bed and would be upset if he left mine after sex. After a year I'd also expect a conversation about where you're going and if you see a long term future. I've only been with Mr R for 6 months but we've discussed how we are looking for someone to have a future with and it may be each other but we're taking it slowly. It sounds to me like you want more than him so you probably should go back on the apps.

[eyebrowsofinstagram]

Update- date lovely but loads of baggage.... we'll see

[eyebrowsofinstagram]

Resorting to plan b of getting drunk and seeing what happens 😳

[scotgal2017]

placemarking but probably won't be on the thread as OLD is barren for me at the moment. Just attracting complete idiots and I'm quite sick of it altogether. I think I'm going to have to resign myself to the fact that I'm not cut out for OLD and as a change in circumstances means ex no longer has DS13 at all so I have no free time, I won't be going out to try and meet anyone either! (not that I do anyway as have no friends to go out with anyway!). How many cats come with the Spinster kit? Hope everyone elses' dating is going well!

[Peanuthedz]

Come and join me on the mad cat day bench @scotgal2017

[Peanuthedz]

Eeesh. So I have happn but am only vaguely browsing. There's no one interesting and I'm not interested really anyway. I matched with someone earlier and I took a couple of hours to reply to his lame, hello opener. He immediately said, I've been waiting for you to reply. Where do you live? 😱 I blocked him. All I'm getting is signs that I really shouldn't be OLD at the moment at all. I think I'll delete the app.

[Eesha]

@Peanuthedz I never really had much luck with Happn, felt a bit like the cool kids were on there, not me!

[Peanuthedz]

@Eesha that's why It's the only one I've been using since I split with MrU. I don't really feel ready for OLD and there's no one on it. Not even cool kids as far as I can tell. I've deleted it now. I definitely need a break and to get over Mr U before I get back out there again. If I ever do.

[Horses4]

@scotgal2017, I find that two cats are included with the starter kit. I dabbled with OLD about a year after I split up with my daughters’ dad (amicably). I hate it with a passion. I mostly seem to attract massive bald truckers or nobody 🤣. Curly is the first person I have genuinely wanted to meet since 2016 and he is neither massive, bald nor a trucker.