Dating thread 172: from developing a rhino hind to finding love in the unusual places...the rollercoaster of dating!

[CodLiverOil556]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. Know your worth.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Treat others as you'd like to be treated 12. Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with 13. The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread

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Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item. 😘

@supercali77 I've ordered the book. Your last comment sounds so like me.

Are you going to meet hole humping man?

Re contraception. Periods stopped by 48. HRT is a wonderful thing. But no wonder I struggled with fertility in my mid 30s. It's hard to use condoms when you don't need to but I do my best. Mr U and I both got tested early on and ditched them but he still managed to share his oral herpes with me somehow. I was quite ill with it too.

Back at you @supercali77 x

@InTheTempest fair enough. For me the situation just dragged my self esteem down and something had to give

@Peanuthedz I found it so helpful....hope it helps you. I will no doubt meet him, it's an event I'm going to that hes hosting. Gonna try and not look floor-like 😂

Hi, so since joining you all last week I haven’t posted much, but read lots...and I have an afternoon date today. I’m going to a wine bar near where I live ( we both like wine ).
I am excruciatingly nervous already, even though we spent nearly an hour on the ‘phone last night, and beginning to wonder if I should have waited a bit...I’m heavier than I like to be, my clothes are all a little snug & tired looking. I have no idea what to wear..it all happed quite quickly.
Odd world out there and every man my age seems to mountain bike !!

Just caught up with the thread. Had my surgery yesterday and stayed in overnight so no hot dates for me this weekend. Think I will be sitting on the window shopping bench for a while

undecided good luck for today
dancer wishing you a speedy recovery

Supercali I get that. I do have my moments but in a different way. If anything he gives me a self esteem boost- even if it's not serious he is clearly attracted to me. He messages me every day and we have a nice friendship too.

What gets hard is wanting to see him more often. And yes probably wanting it to be more than it is. He is also a genuine goodun' really- honest, treats me well, good fun, kind. Never backs out of arrangements or messes me around. I'm realistic- he's 22 and so it was never likely.

Sex wasn't going to be on the cards yesterday for certain reasons- but he still wanted to come see me, even when I said did he want to get home quicker. He said he wanted to see me. We were at the pub and just couldn't keep our hands off eachother though and ended up back at mine.

I need to catch up properly but good luck to everyone going on dates this weekend. Undecided have a fab time, the nerves will disappear after a glass of wine!

@Dancerinthemoonlight I hope your recovery goes well.

We fly at 9:40, as always Heathrow is chaos. I hope everyone has a good weekend and those on half term next week don’t find it too stressful.

Urgh, just received a message cancelling...because I eat differently to him...
Bit pissed off now

Because you eat differently to him? What does that mean? Like you're a vegetarian and he's not? What a pain for him to cancel undecided

I follow a gluten free diet + don't eat pork/beef/lamb - the first because it makes me unwell, the meat because I just don't and have got into a routine of not eating it.
It's an 'issue' for him

That’s rubbish @undecidedsofa What an idiot. It’s really hard when you’ve built yourself up to going on a date to have it cancelled like that. Don’t let it put you off though

undecided what a twit, does he think if you dont eat those things he cant?

Honestly he'll be hard pushed to find someone who eats every single food.

I'd be a nightmare for him - I also dont est gluten as it makes me poorly, I only meat I've reared and cant have too much soya - I seem to manage fine eating out (or in peoples houses)

Sounds like you're better off without him

Thank you nowthefunbegins and sortingitout, It bruised a little.
Back to the drawing board..

I found you!

My date last night cancelled on me yesterday morning.

He asked if i was technically married.
Which i am.
And, which is reassuring i suppose, to know that there are still some men with morals out there, it was a deal breaker.

I am disappointed though. He was secy as fuck. Funny, kind and - apparently - even has morals.

My assurance that the divorce petition had been made. Hed moved out and moved on and i considered myself si gle and free to date didn't seem to be enough.

I'm obviously not heartbroken, but i am disappointed. I was enjoying the flirting and excitement and anticipating something physical because i really really miss sex.

In other news stbx's little 'friend' seems to have actually left her husband. This has surprised a lot of my friends who know the situation. I am wondetong how long it takes their workplace to catch on that they've been having an affair. I think they're deluded if they think it won't come out

Sorry for typos. My friend got me pissed instead and i think I'm still a little drunk

It's his issue @undecided. I don't date vegans anymore but it's my issue not any potential dates.

@Undecidedsofa what a total cock!!!!! I'd struggle to date a massive meat eater although I accept most men I meet will eat meat. I hope I got @HairyArsedMan to consider swiping left on veggies!

@NoMoreWeepingAndWanking wow. I was married for over 10 years after we separated. I was most definitely single!!

Thanks all - I have spent the time I would have taken figuring out what to wear, to contact some others smile
I was married and separated for quite a while nomoreweeping- and my last relationship was with someone who was still married, but separated for about 15 years - I didn't even think about it..

urgh, that should have been not smile

I know right?

I did explain it all and said that both my stbx and I considered me to be single. Then i told him to get back in touch if/when he believed me.

Undecided what a tosser! Seriously, it sounds like s pathetic excuse to me but think of it as a lucky escape from an idiot, you won't waste any time on him at least.

Thank you - my friend who was my back up/emergency call in case it went horribly wrong, said the same too..
Can I ask how many sites everyone is on?
I am on Soulmates - I think I may leave there though as really not many people; also on Bumble ..

nomoreweeping I often wonder what work think of my ex DH and his mistress as hes her boss - and I know everyone there as also worked there for years 🤦‍♀️ I know they had concocted stories of how each had split with wife/husband 6 months prior to their affair starting but i still had loads of people from there on fb that saw we were still definitely together and having holidays away etc 🤷‍♀️ I know my ex would hate for anyone to know for sure what he did as he is big boss man and was always seen as family man - indeed most had met our kids when I had them as I did 2 maternity leaves there. Truth always comes out though

I'm only on Tinder but very halfheartedly atm. I do find tinder and bumble to be quite good though. Met lots of people from tinder