Boyfriend has just blocked me, everywhere

[Blockedandfarted]

My relationship (under one year) ended yesterday and he's blocked me across all channels, WhatsApp Facebook Instagram and I'm guessing text.

A pattern was forming where he'd blow hot and cold so I addressed it yesterday for the second time as I was quite frankly sick of it and wanted to know where I stood once and for all.

After a tense exchange he apologised for the hot/cold stuff and cited having alot on his plate. I said that may be and I'm sorry to hear that but it doesn't give you an excuse to treat me like crap by blowing hot and cold.

He then told me he thinks it's best we leave it between us because he's a good person and I'm making him feel like shit about himself by saying that, he said goodbye and blocked me everywhere without a proper chance for me to respond.

All I did was point out the obvious that it's not ok to push/pull me at his convenience.

He was looking for a way out wasn't he?

I'm hurt that he felt the need to be as drastic as to cut me off completely, I was nothing but good to him. Just last week he was love bombing me with declarations of hope for the future and now this.

He's a dick. At least now you know where you stand.

I agree with PPs - he'll be back, expecting that you'll be grateful and trained to put up with this shit.

Bullet dodged. Onwards and upwards!

The e-mail you sent doesn't sound desperate at all. It sounds mature and it will probably register with your ex just how childish he has been by blocking you

Don't look back! You've had a very lucky escape. I agree to block him on all SM/email if that's possible - (may not be possible on Facebook for example, seeing as he's blocked you already so you won't be able to access his profile to block him). If you realise he has unblocked you in the coming days/weeks just block him then. Fair play for telling your friend not to discuss him. He is no longer your concern. I'd set my SM posts so that only friends can see them, not friends of friends.

I also think he will be back given half the chance. That’s why blocking isn’t a bad thing as it’s kuch easier to move on when you don’t know what the other person is doing.

And better still, they don’t know what you are doing.

He has dropped a bollock if he thinks I'm going to chase after him after being blocked. I've had my closure in the form of a polite goodbye so hes sadly mistaken if his objective is to have me on tender hooks waiting for a way back in.

That type of mindset and potential goal seems ridiculous to me, but then it would wouldn't it because he's a dramatic fruit loop and I can't relate.

Ha oh that is funny Tiger because my ex also likes "building his social media" how coincidental! If he weren't a gym dodger I would be asking whether we have dated the same man.

Men like this always come back. they are usually hot/cold because they have a roster of women. When he's on a down time, don't worry he'll be back.

I think your response was dignified OP. He'll be back definitely. Keep your cool.

He is a dick and you are a bit desperate. He doesn’t want to be your friend, so why do you want to be his?

If he hadn’t of blocked you, I suspect that you’d still be trying to have him in your life, even under the damaging guise of friendship.

The title of this thread says it all, you deliberately didn’t use the accurate prefix of Ex for a reason.

Very consistent blocking with the blowing hot and cold. He doesn't know how to be cross or disagree without completely rejecting someone. I'd call it a necessary break. You don't need that in your life, do you?

I don't think I'm desperate AgentJohnson, the relationship was clearly headed South but what would have been nice was to part on amicable grounds. I don't think I come across badly for being slightly hurt that somebody I've shared my bed with has chosen to behave like this.

"It's very dramatic isn't it, to respond in the way he has."

Not surprising from him though?

I don't think he was necessarily intending to break up though-until you made it clear that you had the measure of him.

"that may be and I'm sorry to hear that but it doesn't give you an excuse to treat me like crap "

The whole blocking/unblocking is just so petulant. Sorry OP it must be really upsetting for you but if he’s this immature then you’re better off without him.

FWIW I was never needy or too full on, I was breezy right the way through and certainly wouldn't have begged for his friendship at the end of the relationship, I just think the way he's chosen to go about parting ways is very childish and dramatic.

But yes it's true I don't want that type of energy in my life so it is a blessing in disguise

You don't need this monumental twat in your life. You can do much better.

He sounds like a man child. He's experienced in getting the attention he wants by any means possible... I would stay out of his path of self destruction.

Congratulations, OP. You have behaved brilliantly. You had the sense not to invest too much in this knob from fairly early on (hence his pouting and flouncing - men like this have to feel they have the upper hand and that the woman will submit to the reward/punishment game and focus only on pleasing Her Owner Man.) And you decided you'd had enough of the poor behaviour rather than worrying and scurrying to make him pleased with you again. And now you realise that he's going to try to crawl back, and you're already moving on and perfectly happy to kick him to the kerb.
You're fab.

You definitely didn't make a fool of yourself. The email was perfect, basically saying you're absolutely fine about him leaving your life after a year, you would have been happy to end it on good terms because you have a complete lack of feelings for him, and his behaviour hasn't upset you at all lol, he won't like that one bit!

He's an absolute dick. Good riddance to him. If he's the type to do that and not give you a chance to respond then I can almost guarantee that he'll come crawling back, because men that do that always do. Ugh. Please block him and make sure that your phone is set up so that it doesn't notify you about when you get a blocked text either. That happened to me before and completely defeated the point!!

Thank you all, it has been a relief to be able to vent about this here and not IRL as to avoid it getting back to him that I'm in the slightest bit bothered.

I am hurt but that's purely because of how cold he was before flouncing, I don't think it's a relationship I will miss for very long nor him as a person.

You've all reaffirmed my own thoughts about him and that he is no loss. I've been laid up with tonsilitis for the past three days and not once did he bother to ask how I was feeling, until I addressed his hot/cold act and then it was all "I know you're ill, I wish I could nurse you. Im here if you need me"

I was happy on my own before him and I'll be happy again, good riddance.

I take it he was middle aged and single when he met you a year ago. There's usually a very good reason for this, for future reference.
The good ones aren't single in middle age.

Vent on here and don’t give him the satisfaction of any future contact. People like that are just no good. Thank your lucky stars you’ve seen this now before investing too much time in him.

Well done OP you have been cool and classy throughout. No sense speculating about whether he is a narcissist etc - the scientific term for his behaviour is TWAT. Your email was awesome.

Oh, the cringe factor of a middle aged man declaring his single status on social media! Its the one we all avoid!

I honestly thought you were talking about someone in their early twenties before you mentioned his age. He sounds so erratic and such a drama queen. You don't want a man like that. His destiny is to be single and increasingly scrapping after little bits of attention.

I've got an awful one on my FB just now who had a lovely gf a few years back. I've never met him but accepted him as we do the same sport and had mutual friends. I've never been single this whole time. He then pmd me and tried to arrange a date with me. I said no and he responded "I've heard its all over for women once they reach 40", so as to try and convince me. I kept him on FB for amusement purposes only. His gf must have left him and he's now single on FB, and turned to obsessive veganism. This week he was pictured at a "vegan campout" for his birthday, photographed standing lonely in a big hall. He must be trying for a vegan gf now so look out!

The only problem with blocking is that you aren't in control of the blocking so can't stop them from creeping back. If he does, seize the initiative and block him yourself.

You're a fab lot here and have made me feel better for posting, thank you!

I must admit, if this was a few years ago my email would have been alot less polite but I have neither the time or inclination for drama at this stage of life.

Qual the mental image I got from your post has made me laugh, stood looking all lonely in a big hall. It has actually reminded me of an equally as cringe photograph of my ex, stood under the big crucifix cross at the national gallery

What peculiar little men they are

Seriously ghosting someone is so pathetic and immature. Typical man thing to do really as they don't want to talk things through or face unpleasant issues.
My ex husband of 20 years did it and it made me realise he was never the man for me and I'd prefer a real man who can face up to questions.
Sounds like you deserve better than this loser.