Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Break up support thread 2

999 replies

Jonsnowsghost · 21/08/2019 21:16

Carrying on the supportive previous thread that ran out of space!
@herbsmokedchicken definitely that, although I wouldn't as I'm not a cheat....

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 20:22

I mean, knowing how long it took him to get with me, and knowing how he is, and also how he actually said he was going to take a break from dating for a while, it’s unlikely, but my mind just goes crazy. Then if he’s online a lot I’m like omg he’s talking to someone on WhatsApp! Which he has every right to but I don’t want him to! Pretty sure he’d tell me if he was seeing someone and it was starting to get serious tho, as a heads up

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 20:55

I miss hiiiiiiiiim. And I bet he’s not even thinking of me. Ugh! 8 weeks tomorrow.

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 21:19

Still not been on WhatsApp. Doesn’t mean he’s not been online. And knowing him, there’s every chance he’s asleep. But I can’t help being so scared he’s with someone.

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 21:23

He was online when I went on to check. Stared at the chat till he went offline. Pathetic.

I used to do this before we got together. I thought if i looked at his “online” status long enough, he’d think of me and text me. It seemed so crazy that I could want someone so much without them wanting me back.

And now I’m in the same position.

PuffinSock · 14/09/2019 21:46

Ah @herbsmokedchicken Sad I know what you mean. My 'relationship' was on and off for 15 months, it was a heated romance towards the end then he suddenly went cold and told me he was going to live with someone he had met previously and she wanted to be with him Sad so I was his back up plan. It felt like he loved me and he claimed to but clearly I was second best.

It hurts so much that he knows I have very little support network, I did nothing 'wrong' and he knows I'm pretty vulnerable but he abandoned me telling me he loves me but loves her more now. It wouldn't surprise me if hes back in touch in weeks/months when he misses the sex/affection/meals or whatever. But I mustn't take him back because he will do it again.

So sad that we are all so hurt and heartbroken. Wish we could all go to the pub for a drink together and cheer ourselves up Smile

I LOVE the whale shark!

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 22:00

Yes it would be so cool if we could all go out on the last together altho I suspect it would end with us all sobbing together in a heap!

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 22:01

*lash

Not that I even drink! Last time I drank was Christmas. I’m out next Friday but I won’t be drinking. Every chance I’d send a text I shouldn’t and even if I didn’t, the alcohol would make me feel sad and sick and I’d feel dire the next day, not worth it, especially as I’m not fussed about drinking anyway.

PuffinSock · 14/09/2019 23:34

Haha yes agreed @herbsmokedchicken, I hardly drink either.

TinselAndKnickers · 14/09/2019 23:39

I am facing a possible cancer diagnosis and shit scared. Called, thinking he'd be asleep, and left a voicemail just letting him know but saying I didn't expect anything from him.

Not sent a message yet but his snapchat score is going up which means he's seen it and ignored me - when the other day I said if I ring, it's urgent.

He can get fucked. I'm disgusted.

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 23:40

That’s another thing I hate about being back on online dating - so many of the profiles either show them drinking alcohol or mention it in their profiles. I’ve got nothing against drinking, most people I know drink, but A doesn’t and I don’t and I just don’t really have any interest in dating someone who drinks. It’s just not something I want! Now and again would be ok but not someone who drinks regularly.
Let’s be real tho right now if I listed everything I want in a partner, it would just be my ex.

herbsmokedchicken · 14/09/2019 23:42

Oh no tinsel how awful, I’m so sorry to see that! You poor thing. What a prick, ignoring you. You need to try and put him out of your mind and focus on yourself - easier said than done I know.

TinselAndKnickers · 15/09/2019 00:50

I feel fucking awful.

herbsmokedchicken · 15/09/2019 00:57

I bet you do, what a fucking awful situation. I don’t really know what to say. But am here to listen! Or, read, I suppose...

TinselAndKnickers · 15/09/2019 09:37

Thanks so much Smile

If he doesn't listen to the voicemail or answer, I'll know to never speak to him. Feel disgusted but I know he's just shutting everything off to avoid feelings.

herbsmokedchicken · 15/09/2019 10:52

Yes that’s really harsh of him

TinselAndKnickers · 15/09/2019 11:32

He rang me this morning and we just spoke for half an hour. I said I missed and loved him and he said it back. Said he'll be here and he's shocked. He was very upset on the phone.

So confusing Sad can't go through this alone.

Lightinthedark · 15/09/2019 11:42

Hi, joining in this fab thread. Not long since I broke it off with my ex.

herbsmokedchicken · 15/09/2019 11:56

That’s good that he rang you and will support you, you need support at a time like this. Confusing support, but better than no support?

TinselAndKnickers · 15/09/2019 12:31

True it is. Praying it's nothing serious! Just as I'm getting happier it all bloody comes at me Grin

herbsmokedchicken · 15/09/2019 12:43

Yes bloody typical eh! I’m not feeling too bad today but also missing him which is a really weird feeling, to be calmly missing someone Hmm calmly isn’t quite the right word tho

Jonsnowsghost · 15/09/2019 12:55

Oh Tinsel hope you're ok. Not sure what to say about him talking to you! Although at least you know you have his support so that is good. Missing my ex today, I miss him just coming to the stables with me and walking whilst I ride. I secretly hope that he misses doing that too, it was always enjoyable (or so i thought!)

OP posts:
herbsmokedchicken · 15/09/2019 13:03

Yes jonsnow I hope mine is missing me but suspect he’s not, or if he is it’s only a little and in passing. Sure he misses the regular sex tho 🙄

Doing a room clear and found a massive spider in the one ton bag I was using so now I can’t use it. He reckoned he wasn’t scared of spiders but I could have put him to the test!

butterandbread · 15/09/2019 13:09

tinsel so sorry to hear that, I haven’t RTFT so am unsure on your situation with him but I hope he truly is there for you if that’s what you want. And that there’s no diagnosis to be had of course!

butterandbread · 15/09/2019 13:10

I think I’ve been dumped today (posted a separate thread because I feel like my head is going to explode with it all), and I just don’t know what to do with myself.

Am I an awful mother for struggling to not be upset in front of my 8mo?

herbsmokedchicken · 15/09/2019 13:43

Oh poor you butter, I had a read and does seem like it’s over but it’s so hard to accept isn’t it?