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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Break up support thread 2

999 replies

Jonsnowsghost · 21/08/2019 21:16

Carrying on the supportive previous thread that ran out of space!
@herbsmokedchicken definitely that, although I wouldn't as I'm not a cheat....

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
TinselAndKnickers · 31/08/2019 02:26

Mmmm sounds amazing! I might get one on Sunday as a treat before I start my new job Monday.

Same here. Il ignore that though and definitely end up hurting more in the long run but Grin I'm young and dumb. Having a bit of a cry again but nothing I can't handle. Been through worse (I think)

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 02:34

It was so good! Glad I made myself because it really is one of the nicer takeaways in my area. Posted about it on fb but if he saw it I doubt he got the significance! Took us months to get together cos he missed all my hints and I had to just woman up and tell him in the end. Wonder what would have happened if I’d never told him? Would we have gotten together anyway? Would I have gotten over my crush? Would I still fancy him now?

We seemed so destined, it’s weird to think we didn’t work out.

New job! Exciting!

Kumali · 31/08/2019 07:45

The thought of the weekend.. Yes a whole two days is giving me the panics. Who do I talk to? Nobody texting me, nothing to do. This is the pits.. I know breaking up was the right thing to do but I feel worse than I an ever remember

Original poster
Jonsnowsghost · 31/08/2019 08:44

Miss him and want to talk to him so badly, the usual really! I hate the weekends, we always spent them together and now I feel so lost and lonely. Aside from the other stuff above about rebound relationships another point was about them looking at your social media because they want to see what you are up to. He watches my stories all the time, normally within an hour.... it's all adding up...!
So I'm having a complete break from social media. Then there's more of a chance he might miss me as he will wonder what I'm doing. Trying not to post anything until my holiday on the 22nd, which is hard as I post all the time normally! I think it's a good technique we can all use :)
Stay strong everyone

OP posts:
herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 10:18

To be fair I could do with not posting so much anyway so maybe I’ll take a bit of a break too!

Dreamed we went for a spin and he told me he’d been on a couple of dates with a girl but prob wouldn’t come to anything and now I feel envious and it wasn’t even real. How dare some fictional girl take my man? She was Muslim tho so think a reflection of my fears that deep down that’s the real reason we broke up.

Yeah weekends suck! Normally I’d be in his bed, waiting for the lazy bastard to wake up, and figure out what our plan for the day was. I don’t want to be sat at home without him. It suuuucks.

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 10:19

Might go for a spin later or something, and got so much housework to do yet again so I guess that’ll kill some time.

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 10:36

Something about Scottish highlands on tv. WE WERE GOING TO GO THERE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Greysmanicfan41 · 31/08/2019 11:04

Meh looked at her social media all of a sudden driving tractors and so involved with farm meh for years she didn't do this, why now?

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 14:02

It’s raining. We used to love cuddling up in bed whilst it rained outside 😭😭😭 ugh I hate this so much

Mumcomehere · 31/08/2019 14:04

Feel like shit today, I cant stand this feeling.

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 14:08

I know mumcomehere compared to some other days I’m not feeling too bad but I still feel crap! Also we got together in the autumn so as it starts to get more autumnal it makes me feel it more? I know it’ll fade but hate this

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 19:53

How are we all doing today? I’m feeling meh but not too bad, still keep thinking about what I’d normally be doing on a Saturday. 7 weeks ago today since our last Saturday together, I had zero idea something was wrong but he did.

Mumcomehere · 31/08/2019 19:56

My Saturday update, my brother saw ex, had a right go at him apparently - drama, drama, drama Hmm. After my brother finished his rant, ex informed he is leaving and going back home (which is not the uk), so brother told him to fuck off and ges a piece of shit. I'm not sure what to make of it all, at least if this is true, I wont bump into him ever again.

Strawberrycupcakes212 · 31/08/2019 20:13

Oh well, it’s saturday night. I’m still in my dressing gown and not changed my bed in about a fortnight so decided to get up and clean my house and myself. He’s probably out having fun and I’m here picking up the pieces of my broken life. I wish I had never met him because the happiness I had wasn’t worth this pain. Everything makes me sad right now. I can’t even watch tv without crying. I wish time would pass. His mum messaged today to ask me for a coffee. We always got on well but why poke the bear when there’s been no contact? He’s close to his mum so just know she’s messaged me...

Original poster
Jonsnowsghost · 31/08/2019 20:34

Same, miserable, sad, he's off having a good saturday eve with his new gf and I'm picking up my broken life. Horrible, I hate this so much.

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AdviceforMeplease · 31/08/2019 21:16

Still struggling here. I fucking hate the weekends. He was in touch and then wasn’t again. I feel so lonely and miss him so much. He went out last night and can’t help but worry he was flirting or with other girls. Haven’t heard from him and not able to stalk social media! When will this be over!! Have put on weight from all the fucking wine I’m guzzling trying to get through this

AdviceforMeplease · 31/08/2019 21:16

Have caught up a bit with the thread and sorry to see we’re all still in the same boat as last weekend. Big hug to all

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 21:28

Weekends suck eh! I want to be with him right now and I’m not and it’s not bloody fair!!

Original poster
Jonsnowsghost · 31/08/2019 21:30

How is it fair that he can cause me so much pain and misery whilst he's off having a great time. And her as well, how can she be happy when she knows that he cheated to be with her?! Who even does that?! Unless she's one of those women who are flattered that someone left their partner for her.... just feeling so down about it, having a little cry.

OP posts:
Kumali · 31/08/2019 21:33

I've had a blitz on cleaning and eaten a whole pack of jaffa cakes. I'm actually starting to think back to some of the horrible things he said to me.. And there's this glimmer of anger coming through, and the feeling that actually I deserve so much more.. Could this be progress....

MissYeti · 31/08/2019 22:23

Wow I'm really sad to see you all having such a hard time Sad sending so much love to you all!!

I don't want to seem like I'm bragging but I've actually had a really lovely day with DS, my mum and my brother. Twat was supposed to take me and DS to the zoo today but he fucked off and we already bought tickets so we figured we'd go anyway and I'm so glad we did ❤

Enjoying a glass of pink gin and lemonade cuz it's my birthday Cake and I feel good about where I am right now. Probably the gin talking - we'll see how I feel tomorrow 😂

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 22:37

I’m so pleased you had a good day! It’s important we all celebrate our good moments as well as discuss the bad!
I’m just generally feeling deflated. Flashbacking to happier times a lot today. Understandable I guess since our last proper day as a couple was on a Saturday even if I didn’t know that at the time.

herbsmokedchicken · 31/08/2019 22:37

And happy birthday!

PuffinSock · 31/08/2019 23:28

@herbsmokedchicken good for you for getting a good treat in! Important to be kind to yourself after all this heartache.

Please can I ask - does no contact work??? My guy only revealed he was heading off into the sunset with another woman a week ago...but already I've had a message saying he misses me. Just wonder, when he contacts again, likely to ask to meet, do I refuse or ignore or agree to a few weeks time, so hes had time to 'live out' his decision and miss me more? Thanks for any thoughts...

herbsmokedchicken · 01/09/2019 01:00

Oh I got to go to sleep. This hurts so much. I haven’t spoken to him in a month??? What the fuck. I feel better than I did but I hoped I’d feel better by now.