Dating Thread 165: The bravest thing you will ever do is love again ❤

[JeSuisPrest]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Appswww.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

daffo again great update - I get that...as soon as becomes serious I can imagine how trust etc can come in to play in a serious way with someone who in effect was a total stranger less than a year ago!good luck to you.
ant agree with others - miss H seems to be taking the biscuit now!
average I would normally be wary of someone/question their boundaries who's so willing to have a first date with LO in tow - especially the suggestion of first date at her house 🤔 however as the LO is only 6 months I think that seems ok and if this is her first time of OLD I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and would say it's worth a meet - she probably just hadn't considered the security implications of having a stranger in her house.
jesuis your post about having to keep all the plates spinning etc really resonated with me.
marls grade A cunt sounds a spot on description of my exp.
sunshine plenty of aftersun and I'm sure you'll be a bronzed goddess by the time you get home.
lily glad your son was returned safely back to you.
Hi to all others on the thread I haven't mentioned.

shit I would be p'd off too in your shoes - I'm sure mr B is great but be mindful this isn't the first time he's fallen short on treating you with the same consideration as you show him...

@shitwithsugaron That is crap, especially when you've arranged childcare around it. It feels like you've "wasted" a night when they're few and far between to start with. I get up at 7am on days I work and I've spent the night before at MrC's (he never stays at mine), then drive an hour to work - I get a coffee in bed, my shower run so it's warm when I get in and some toast for when I'm ready. All this on his days off so he doesn't get a lie in at all - he's up at 4am on his work days (when I don't stay over). Vent on here though, not worth having an argument over.

Sorry meant bats not marls!

Hello! I've lurked for most of this thread, so I thought I'd jump in, 2 years post divorce, tried Match.com and scared myself, have been on bumble for 2 weeks, matched with a bloke (call him Mr P) whose picture seemed to see right through me, got pretty heavy pretty quickly on messages considering I was married unhappily for at least 8 years, i. E. No experience of modern dating, and met up last week to zinging chemistry, but he's too busy to meet again for this week, I am watching and learning from all you experts.
I reactivated bumble today after a bit of reflection on not wanting to jump back into the frying pan iyswim, but I then came across the stereotypical shot of man holding baby alligator and all I wanted to do was screenshot to send to MrP for the laughs. Clearly I need not to, so I thought I'd share the concept on here instead. Any tips welcomed, I feel like I haven't done any of this since the school playground...

Well I've just sent the text asking for a chat tomorrow so let's see...
Savoretti you're probably right so I may as well get it over with.

@JeSuisPrest and he says he doesn't love you...

@shitwithsugaron sounds like fairly typical male behaviour. We do all the supporting and get little back. I don't think I've ever experienced anything other than that.

Apologies to the Thread Men.

Ah bloody Mercury. I've just burned my bridges with a group of "friends". I can't really go into it and it's nothing to do with dating really I just think I'm a bit naive about being a single woman and I'd forgotten that men are often predatory. I had a metoo moment (yeah one of hundreds and who hasn't ) last year and got no support from our mutual group of friends. I finally lost it on WhatsApp today and god I feel better... did suddenly remember @Coffeeandchocolate9 saying hang off on any decisions til the end of the week but fuck it. Not sure why I'm sharing really! I naively thought the whole divorced woman stealing our husbands thing was a bit 70s but it's still a thing, my fault for having a good figure and wearing lipstick. Aaarghhhh I never flirt either.

Anyway.

No news from @Ant330

@DaffoDeffo I'm very pleased for you but I used to like your posts. You seem so sorted.

@midcenturylegs go for it. Weight comes and goes (mine does anyway) and men will be a lot less bothered about it than you are. And yes I remember there was a guy on tinder I matched with selling some kind of psychology type thing. I wasn't annoyed just a bit meh. Sadly I can't say what mr U is selling but it would make sense if I could. Ish.

X posts @Ant330 . Not sure whether fingers crossed or not for her reply

Right not that I want to believe in this mercury in retrograde thing, I've just bitten my tongue on something with Mr C. Daft, very likely, but I'll wait until we meet the week after next to say it instead so I can make sure it comes out OK.

Tldr His photos are too hot to feck this up just yet...

We're meeting Weds during the day.

Is that good @Ant330?

I doubt it.

No. Doesn't sound it does it? Ah I'm sorry. It's shit.

Sorry that was a bit of a blunt reply.
The text chat was ok, just organising when and where, with another "sorry I'm quiet".
But we've spent every Tues together since we met, but tomorrow she's working and clearly had no intention of telling me.

Ha, I think you have every right to be blunt under the circumstances. You can't speak on the phone or something? That would feel like a long wait for me.

🤞 you get some closure either way on Wednesday. Remember even if she wants to resume things and get back to normal as if nothing has happened you are free to express your opinions and call time on it if that's what you want to do.

Gives me another night to convince myself I'm ok with it Peanut
Don't think that's going to happen Coco but yes you're right and I have no idea how I'd react if that was the case.

SimonJT Three weeks and six months are nothing

Indeed, I am saying nothing on the subject

This thread does often trigger my "I'm not normal" anxiety, the total over investment in random strangers makes up for it though

@simonjt i am sorry if I triggered you. You've nothing to worry about. If you are happy as you are, and you certainly sound it, don't change because of a group of random strangers. Each to their own!

Miss h certainly needs a shake. Maybe she's not over the trauma with her exh and despite having found a guy who could be so right for her, she is too broken still. Thats so sad, for both of you.

Ant, like a previous poster (can't remember who, sorry) I wonder if everything has moved a bit fast for Ms Hair? So she's sabotaging? She might not realise that she's doing it, though ...

@Ant330 I'm glad you have a meeting arranged. How long sill that be since you last saw her?

*will