Dating Thread 165: The bravest thing you will ever do is love again ❤

[JeSuisPrest]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Appswww.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

thanks @ant330 @hairyarsedman I am generally quite low maintenance grooming wise yet today I bought new tweezers and a handbag mirror and spent about 15 minutes removing chin hairs. They actually weren't the inch long ones - they can be easily removed - but the little sods were short enough to be a nightmare to pull out but long enough that you could feel them there. If I were still with my ex I wouldn't bothered, but Mr R is so bloody tactile which I love when I'm not paranoid about my hairy face. He doesn't seem to have any unruly ear or nose hairs either, maybe he is at home frantically plucking stray hairs so I don't see them!

Yes I've decided not to point out the hypocrisy, didn't think it would help 😂

@Ant330 Best not to fan the fire. She doesn’t appear to be acting reasonably, we all get annoyed etc, but you can’t keep it taking it out on other people.

Hiya I'm a newbie but have been lurking - on the subject of facial hair, I got a great gadget a few weeks ago which has sorted mine out! I've been OLD dating on and off for a while. I started seeing someone a few weeks ago but he seems to blow hot and cold so back to apps for me I think.

Ant - you have behaved very respectfully - for your own sake perhaps you need to take a small step back.

ant we all get upset by things and s lot of us go quiet to process, but we should still be aware of and try to avoid inflicting pain on other people, especially someone we love. Four days is a long time for her to be unaware or uncaring about your pain. Whatever the reasons for her behaviour, think carefully about whether repeats of it into the future are what you want.

@Ant330 she sounds either like shes stringing it out or something else is happening e.g. depression or mood swings around menses?? Maybe? But I agree in-person chats are essential after stuff like that. While she might ha e had a shit time with a stonewalling ex - 4 days and no proper chat is a bit of a radical change after being in each others pockets. I mean it may be she also feels she needs a bit of space to gather her thoughts ya know?

I'd say having the hump for 4 days is a bit much @Ant330 - I do hope you haven't bagged yourself a sulker. I'd much rather have words both say our piece and clear the air than deal with sulking. Too many years of dealing with silent treatment from STBXH - days and nights /events/birthdays etc ruined because of it.

Seeing MrC later - managed to find a nice sexy as fuck chemise in Ann Summers reduced from £28 to £8! That man is in for a treat (but so am I 😳😂)

@Ant330 as an ex sufferer of extreme PMS I relate to the just wanting to be in bed. But after your tiff she should really let you pop round even if it's to eat choc and watch crap tv for an hour. You don't need to discuss it til she's back on form. I think she's meeting sulking with sulking -and I know it wasn't sulking but can't think of a better term. Silence. Which is the thing that pissed her off in the first place. I think you've cut her a lot of slack. I would try to leave her to it now. Easy for me to say I know.

Unfucking believable!!! She's well enough to go shopping with her mum and is then going to her mum's for dinner b4 picking her her daughter up from a party later. She's suggested we do something tomorrow!
Asked me if I'd have the hump, and I just said reverse the positions and tell me how you'd feel.
She says if she didn't want to see me at all she'd say so, she just doesn't want to come round with the hump.
Who the fuck has the arse for 4 days just because somebody went a bit quiet!
And if you knew you'd annoyed or upset somebody wouldn't you drop them a text to say sorry, nothing!
Rant over, ffs!
Miserable night ahead on my own, might start drinking now

X post with @JeSuisPrest. Yes she does sound like a sulker. I had years of similar too. It's not a great reaction.

I have to say reading all the teething troubles I'm glad Mr U is not a LTR (ok so it's almost six months and he mentioned us being together after a year but in my head it's not) as there is stuff I would have to call him out on. But I'm realising he just has no time and tries to fit too much in. I always claim not to believe in astrology but we have the same birthday and there are so many of his annoying quirks that I just get. We also do that weird thinking of the same thing at the same time thing. He's also not emotionally available in the least.m. But then currently neither am I.

Ah @Ant330 yeah that's really really rubbish of her. It really is. Try to hold off the booze til the sun crosses the yard arm though. You'll only feel worse.

She's just texted on WA to say sorry she just needs a bit of space and time, and she knows she's doing what she called me out on.
I really don't know how to reply, nothing that will come across well right at this minute so it can wait for a bit.

That's just mean of her @Ant330 and especially after 4 days of silence.

Don't think you have to jump to her whistle

Sorry xpost

Sometimes silence can be the best response.

Until you have collected your thoughts.

I've just messaged a couple of mates, I'm going out. I've got no intention of sitting around waiting just because she "might be available later".

Another message "I still feel the same, ok"
Bloody funny way of showing it!

@Ant330 yeah go out. It's sounding slightly game play y. She's now being bang out of order. Why do relationships have to be so sodding tricky?

Glad you are going out @Ant330

Anybody got suitable suggestions for a reply, she can see I've read the first but not the 2nd.
I have a lot to say but it's probably best to keep most of it to myself.

Something about you've decided to go out too and shall catch up with her later?

I'd be tempted to say I'm busy tomorrow so she'll have to wait. But it's a bit childish. Ok a lot