Dating Thread 165: The bravest thing you will ever do is love again ❤

[JeSuisPrest]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Appswww.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

FMFL good luck on your date. Wear a dress, stick to your plan of no sleepover (no need to spell it out again, you've already stated it) and just enjoy!

Actually I really like her responses and your messages to her today Ant. You've shown her you're not ignoring her or "it", and she's let you know that she is still engaging and recognises her own stuff as hers. I think that's really positive on both counts.

Don't worry about taking up thread, it's really nice to be able to give support as well as receive.

Hey everyone. Bit late to this thread but after a year of single like I've been on two (official) dates lately with a friend of a friend and have signed up on OkCupid and Bumble.
I've been at a few mutal house parties with a friend of a friend (GT) so finally caved and let him take me out. Went for drinks twice over two weeks and he came over to mine on friday after the mutal friends BBQ and we slept together. It wasnt until I thought about the sex later I realised I still dont particularly fancy him... I thought the fact hes nice and we get on ok would make me fancy him after a while but nope... still no spark. Should I just cut him loose? Thank you in advance!

@FMFL good luck!! My date has just got in touch so we're on for coffee..... Shall be thinking of you and hoping it's going well!

MotherofaCat three dates including DTD and you know you don't fancy him, personally I feel it would be more hurtful to carry on than to politely say thanks but no thanks. Awkward in terms of your mutual friend.

Thanks all, you've been incredibly helpful today, felt quite emotional at lunchtime but better now.
Think apart from occasionally messages I've done everything I can really, it will be what it will be.
I'm a bit disappointed that she seems unaware or indifferent to how she's made me feel yesterday and today, but trying to ignore that for the moment.
Anyway need to put it to the back of my mind as I'm picking my son up in an hour and I haven't seen him for 2 weeks, so don't want to seem miserable
Thanks again!

@CassettesAreCool lbd ready, new (not too high heeled) shoes out and I’m off out for a run to calm my nerves. I hope this all gets easier at some point! Mr Bucket is lovely though and prefers to call rather than text which I find really nice. It’s just the sex chat that’s putting me off.

Well not putting me off as such but I’m not sure it’s been the best idea. May know more later. I’ll be updating from the loos!

Hi all

Just a quick pop back to say MrMechanic is moving into my new place with me next Friday!

Lots of new adventures coming our way and I can't wait!!

Hope everyone is doing well, am now about to read back through the thread 😂

Good luck on your dates FMFL and Putastraw

Ant she may seem unaware or indifferent of your feelings, but you don't know that. It might equally be that she knows her reaction is hurting you and finds this makes it all the more difficult to talk about.

Hi all, crikey these dating threads move fast lol. I posted on the last thread to ask about guy I thought had ghosted me and he told me screen was smashed so that's why he couldn't contact me for 3 days. I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt and since then normal service has resumed . He asked 2 weeks ago if I would like to go to dinner and stay at his place afterwards but he has said no rush and we can just meet for coffee if I want, but I agreed I'd like to stay over as it feels the time is right. Previous dating means I have had ONS and unemotional fucktards but this feels different - I wasn't bothered about my body before with them but now I'm anxious that if we dtd he'll run a mile afterwards and because he is (so far) a promising prospect and I really like him, I'm really nervous for tomorrow when this is happening. Also because I've never stayed over on previous "dates" and was married long term before that I don't know what I should take? Just spare underwear, small deoderant and travel toothbrush in my handbag or is it acceptable to take a small bag with pj's and above, I don't want to scare him off with too much luggage either . Any advice or words of wisdom?? I've been shopping to buy some new underwear today so hopefully that helps a bit but still nervous!

scotgal this subject came up fairly recently, most posters seemed to agree that a well laundered birthday suit is the best option

Just been cancelled on at the last minute. He blocked me on Whatsapp immediately and unmatched me on Tinder too 🤷🏻‍♀️ Can’t catch a break at the moment.

thelaststraw I take it MrM is OLD-derived? Congratulations!

scotgal yes we covered this topic in detail recently but I think opinion was split about PJs on the basis of size of norks, if I recall . I agree it's offputting if someone turns up with a massive bag, but effectively nothing at all seems a bit too out there. I use a small overnight bag that is a bit bigger than a handbag. My DF gave it to me for my 21st birthday so I am really fond of it and it calms me down if I'm nervous, like a blankie.

RaspberryGirl what a total wanker

@Raspberrygirl WTAF. That’s shit. Hugs

@CassettesAreCool yeah I started dating him from Bumble 8 months ago ☺️
Now we're here!

We both keep saying to each other how we never thought online dating would work 😂

Congrats the last I remember you mentioning Mr Mechanic on the thread back before Xmas and welcome back scot

Hello!

New here. Separated in January. Had a disastrous Tinder date in April after two weeks of texting. Well not disastrous, more comedy awful.

Finally dipped my toe in again yesterday. Came out with 5 matches and chatted to one. He seems normal and we have arranged to meet after work on Monday for a drink on southbank.

I am 4 years older with 3 kids. He's an exec, never married. What should I be asking him oh wise ones? He's also Italian but very well travelled. I am pretty international too.

He's been on a few Tinder dates but said no spark as yet..

@Ant330 first up no apologies needed on here! 'apart from' the fact her response seems quite focused on her, she's only saying leave her be for a bit. It doesn't sound like she has any intention of ending things.

After you to are through this, she needs to be willing to talk about what happens next time you both trigger each other off taking into account your needs too

@Ant330 Dont be daft, you're very valuable member of our little community and we all need to be able lean on each other when we're going through a wobbly patch OLD related or otherwise. I'd take comfort from the let me be mardy lol text - she's telling you she's hurting but she's not angry. Sounds like the kind of thing I'd send. She's not a Leo is she? 🙈😂

@putastrawunderbaby and @FMFL Loo updates please, hope the dates are going well.

@RaspberryGirl That's just shit. How long had you been chatting for?

@sofato5miles Welcome! Does he know about your kids? If yes, I wouldn't worry about it. 4 years isn't a lot either way. I'm 5 years old than my BF and he has no kids, I do 🤷🏻‍♀️

@scotgal2017 Bless you. I've said this before and I'll say it again. Be confident! If a man is at the stage of sleeping with you he's worrying more about his cock size/ whether he'll cum too quickly/whether he'll make you cum at all - he is not thinking "Christ she should lay off the Pringles!", he's thinking "This is fucking great, think of Theresa May and don't cum!!"

@Marlboroandmalbec34 What a dick, at least you didn’t have to wait a few months to see his true colours.

@Sunshineandflipflops Ha, rubbish self control, are you going pretend you opened it on your birthday? What does SAS stand for? I always think special army service, at least you didn’t say it to him.

Who else is happy that it’s much cooler today? Sleeping was awful last night.

MrNNs flight was on time and he got to his flat about half an hour before me, so I felt quite guilty as I had to wake him up to get in the building. Luckily he is the opposite of me when woken up. Had a quick nap (in 16 degree aircon!), he was achey from his flight so I had to use cooking oil for a massage, he ended up smelling like a chip shop 😂 got a bit sweaty, shared a shower, got a bit sweaty again. What was really unfair though is that he bought loads of different flavour oreos from the states, I could only eat three biscuits while he got to eat two packs. I bought some football tickets for his birthday, I have agreed to go with him, but only if he will come to a rugby match as we all know football is crap, there is hope that he can be re-educated. Going to see each other again on Monday 😁 and this Friday my cousin is having MiniSJT for one of her over nights 😁 already excited!

MiniSJT loved forest school and was fast asleep by 6:30, he can go there more often!

@SimonJT glad you and MrNN have been reunited and yay for forest school!

I named him MrSAS because one of his Tinder pics was of him muddy and wet and he looks like the guy from SAS:Who Dates Wins in it!

@JeSuisPrest I am a Leo too 😂

Who DARES, not who dates! Pretty apt for this thread though 😂