He did it again

[Ilikesleepinginthedark]

NC.

Sitting here with a swollen black eye. Don't know whether to report as I don't want social services to be involved.

[Ilikesleepinginthedark]

DC is at home. I'm going to go to the hospital. Should I report there or make my own enquires and report at the station ?

[Iwantacookie]

Op your a victim.
Please don't be a statistic as one who gets murdered.
I know it's hard but phone the police and report him.

[Quartz2208]

Ok you have done nothing wrong so yes go to the police and report (and maybe get an injunction)

[WifOfBif]

If you DC saw, you need to report it.

It is better it comes from you. If they tell someone and they report it, it paints you in a negative light.
He came to your home uninvited and assaulted you in front of your child. This is not your fault.

[Itsallchange]

Oh sweetheart, do whatever feels more comfortable, are you ok to get the hospital, are you taking DC with you. I hope you get the help you need xx

[HeavenlyEyes]

I agree with going to hospital - and I would tell them the full story. I would guess they will refer you but I would also speak to police yourself.

[PicsInRed]

They are going to take my child away. I would also lose my job as I'm a nurse- due to my child being on a child protection plan.

If you ask to leave they'll help you.
If you refuse to leave, yes, that will look bad.

Think logically, why on earth would a nurse lose her job because her partner is knocking her about. Statistically, given the number of women being knocked about at any one time, that would create quite the worsened staff shortage. 🤔

[RandomMess]

So your ex assaulted you in your home?

Why is that your fault? Start proceedings for court order so he can get near you or your DC ever again.

[rainbowstardrops]

This isn't your fault. Go to the hospital if you can and tell them everything.

[rightteous]

This is not your fault. You aren’t living together. He came to your home and assaulted you. He needs to be locked up. You deserve protection. You don’t have to put up with this. Please keep posting. We are all here to help you

[ColdAndSad]

Please report him. And get yourself checked out at the hospital--you don't know what damage he caused you.

SS and the police will try to support you, not blame you. You've done nothing wrong. Your ex is the one who should be worried and frightened, not you.

I hope you're ok.

[Ilikesleepinginthedark]

Do the police have to meet me at my home ? Can they come to the hospital or meet me outside ?

[WifOfBif]

They’ll come to hospital x

[ilovepinkgin33]

OP you will not be subject to a child protection order if you report him, of course social services will be alerted, but as long as you are safeguarding DC and yourself there will be no reason to escalate, please get yourself checked and report him, you need to put in for a non molestation order

[CheesecakeAddict]

I had women police officers come see me at my home. I know people say they don't care about that, but actually I realised it was easier to speak to other women about this

[tomatoesandstew]

Contact Women's Aid. They will be able to give you proper advice especially if you are worried about Social Services being involved and what they will say about child safeguarding and safeguarding of the woman. 0808 2000 247

It's not automatic that a nurse would lose a job because their child is on a child protection plan for domestic violence. In fact that would probably be illegal.

However, if your child is at risk of harm then you need to consider how you best support you and your child an keep you both safe away from a violent man. I can see how much you are panicking right now and its clouding your judgement.

[Blushingm]

You wouldn't lose your job - the plan would be to protect you both from dc dad not that they think you're a bad parent

Ps I'm a nurse too

[HebeMumsnet]

Hi OP. We're so sorry he's done this. for you.

We thought you might want to have a look at our Domestic Violence page, perhaps tomorrow, once you've sorted the immediate issues, which has lots more numbers you can call for support and advice going forward.

We're thinking of you and hope you're ok and can get something sorted tonight.

[LittleFairywren]

Poor you and poor DC. You do know you have to report him but it must be terrifying. Hand hold

[31RueCambon]

Go to the doctor and tell them. If you aren't ready to tell the police, please tell the gp.

[31RueCambon]

I hope you're ok.

Please tell the police. You won't lose your child if you report to the police.

[Itsallchange]

Hope your ok OP can imagine tonight will be a tough one so sending you lots of strength xxx

[looondonn]

Poor
You

This was me when my baby was 7 weeks
She is now 1.5 years old

Was dreadful

Now I am hoping he will be put in jail for what he has done

I know how hard it is but please do listen to the good advice on here and keep posting

Do not let the b--tard get away with this

[olivetreelane]

Op, do you not have any safeguarding training? I do and I'm a midwife. I'm sure it was an NMC standard.

Anyway, I can categorically tell you you will not lose your child OR your job for being assaulted on your doorstep.

You have removed yourself from the relationship which would be seen as protecting your child.

You did not expect him to turn up and you did nothing other than endured physical abuse.

Go to the hospital and the safeguarding procedures will be taken care of; and they are and will be to support you and your DC only.

Good luck

[justilou1]

I suspect this will be more problematic if you don’t report this, sweetie. (Especially as you are not together, etc... you are doing the right things.)