Dating thread 162: (Don't wanna be) All by myself...

[Sunshineandflipflops]

The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

I feel do so lonely since my ex husband left me, I don't have many friends and they're always busy with their own lives. I think that's why the first man to shower me with attention I just got drawn in to it.
BTW he contacted me again around lunch time and have been messaging each other all afternoon till I've just asked him if he wants to meet up again at the weekend lol he's read the message (40 mins ago) but not replied and he's still online lol I'll take that as a no then! Yes I know you all told me I know, I know I just don't know why he does it when he has no intention of actually seeing me its just a waste of both our time arrrghhhhhhh. I've been back on tinder but I just can't seem to find anyone even remotely attractive or someone I would like to meet oh why is this so difficult.
I just feel like sending him a sarcastic message but knowing him he'll twist it round to make me look like an idiot and say something negative about me so I'll sit on my hands and see how he gets out of it if he ever replies lol I won't lose anymore sleep over him hopefully now though!

twoopen I’m not usually one for blocking but I do wonder whether in this case it would be best to do so?

That photo sounds awful btw why are there so many weird guys out there?
We're all just normal women wanting a nice guy and all we get are knobheads lol

Sent too early. Sounds like he is not a kind man, and do you really need anyone unkind in your life?

@TwoOpenOneClosed some men just seem to want a glorified pen pal. I've been there too. Or they're more attached than they're letting on.

I've just had three long messages in quick succession from another iron, in answer to my question (2 days ago...) of his weekend plans. He's laid them out but hasn't suggested meeting up, even though he's said he has nothing planned for x night yet. What is wrong with these people?!! 😂

I agree cassettes I think, I would just like closure but I probably won't get it, I was just part of his sick way of getting off on making me want him all the time. It's just weird that men would rather hide behind a phone screen than actually have real sex and/or a relationship.

It is weird, two, but I for one couldn’t give less of a fuck as to why they do it. Send polite ‘byebye’ text, delete chat ( so cant see when/if it’s been read) and delete number so I can’t text again. Move on.

@shitwithsugaron I've replied. Depending on how he replies I will most certainly engage gobby mare mode and ask. What have I got to lose?

Just had another message from someone who "wants some peace" after ending it with his ex. 🙄

OMG he's actually replied I think I spoke too soon I might not write him off just yet!

Update on date I just went on: nice bloke but didn't fancy him. Not bad looking but not my type. Bless him he was keen and I will see if he messages then let him down gently. Bailed out after an hour as want to get to the gym tonight

Still undecided about other first date shag tomorrow so will let AF decide for me.

Seeing Mr Travel again Sunday for dinner and cocktails :)

Mr no hair sent me a message today asking why I wasn’t talking to him (I know I should have blocked him last week but couldn’t work out how too), I was brave and sent a message back saying “I don’t appreciate someone forcing themselves on me when I’m unwell or in fact at any time, good bye” , he messaged me back saying “hope you feel better and good luck” 😡.
Also been getting hassle from Mr Banter, I told him last week that I wasn’t in the mood for dating but he said he wanted to stay in touch and asked if we could be friends so we had still been texting, last night he got funny with me and misunderstood my message and thought I wanted to be his girlfriend, I then explained that I didn’t but was happy to meet up as friends, he’s a good guy just not my type, I don’t think it went down well 😐.

I now have no irons, just one FWB (Mr Young) who isn’t even good in bed. It feels weird not having my phone going off every few minutes but it’s also nice to return to normality. I’m still on POF but not putting much effort in unless someone amazing comes along.

@Lovemusic33 What a twat 🤬

He really doesn't see what he did wrong does he?

I'm sure you'll get some more irons soon (if that's what you want)

At what stage are you an official 'item' and no longer single? Is there a date number to aim for?

@TwoOpenOneClosed Dont take it as a 'no'...that would be direct and honest. That's not what hes doing. Hes not answering one way or another which is keeping you hanging around.

You dont understand it because....you wouldn't behave like this. Most of us wouldn't. We'd reply yes or no or I'll have to think or I'm not sure etc. He's just evading answering. You dont need to send a sarcastic message, but you dont have to sit on your hands either. Make a decision. Does this help or harm your self esteem? Do you think this will get better if he decides to go on a second date?

@TwoOpenOneClosed what's he saying?

sunshine, yes, no apology at all, not that I was really expecting it.
I would like more irons but I will be very selective. I’m pretty busy with new dog coming home tomorrow so won’t have time to date for a week or so.

@Lovemusic33 What a lovely thing to look forward to x

Supercali77 basically he said would I really want to come all the way over to his for what we had been talking about all afternoon. So still being vague and not committing lol I've replied but nothing back yet. lol

Can I ask what 'Iron' means in this thread ?
Thanks !

... I ask because Mr Shakes baked me a cake from scratch because he knows my period is due and I love chocolate cake He presented it to me today.

@LooUpdate Marry that man 😍😂

@LooUpdate that sounds lovely! I don't think there is a right time for everyone but if I really liked someone, I would want to have the 'does this have potential' chat around a month and the 'are we an actual thing?' around 2-3 months.

Afternoon date has just whatsapped me. Not read it yet but first line looks enthusiastic. Feel bad as he was lovely but physically not my type so a non-starter really. He is originally from India and moved about a lot in Europe and I don't think ever managed to stay in one place long enough for a relationship. He is my height and fairly slender and I like men to be broader and/or taller than me.

@TwoOpenOneClosed hes a waste of space. Stop replying. My opinion. Do with it what you will