Dating thread 162: (Don't wanna be) All by myself...

[Sunshineandflipflops]

The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

I'm in with the out of hours gp in an hour. Urgh.

At least you should get some antibiotics quickly.

I keep getting very low level UTIs these days. Nothing bad enough for antibiotics (certainly no pissing razor blades 😱), but not all that pleasant. I’m having to force myself to interrupt the lying around and cuddling bit post-sex to go and pee.

Why on Earth is female anatomy so ridiculous that the action that leads to the continuation of the species can also cause UTIs?

Get well soon @Sunshineandflipflops.

I've never contracted a UTI from sex but it sounds horrible!

Yeah it's me that can't commit not him!

@Sunshineandflipflops your body is telling you something re mr SAS. Get well soon

I struggle a bit to feel toooo sorry for people in pain from having too much sex 🤣

I can't remember what it feels like to have too much sex, or any sex really .

It is really a case for the world’s tiniest violin really, @Ginmel. Well, in my case anyway. 😂

Right, I'm doing this wrong already.

I only got bumble last night but no-one is messaging me back and some people are unmatching after I message At least I assume that's what's happening as the chats disappear.

I'm sending jokey personal intro messages, not generics or just 'Hi'.

Where am I going wrong?!

Also: it wasn’t an attempt at a stealth boast. Although, in hindsight, ‘woe is me; I keep getting low level UTIs from too much shagging’ looks a lot like one.

It’s not you @DerelictWreck. It is them. And depressingly common on OLD.

It appears that some men swipe right on everyone and then decide they’re not interested afterwards. And an alarming number of people just try to collect matches for the ego boost.

I disliked bumble because of the requirement to message first. There’s nothing so depressing as carefully crafting a witty message that gets ignored or unmatched as a response. And I didn’t like the pressure.

So I waited for people to message me on tinder instead. 😂 I did make sure to bloody respond if they messaged though.

I really disliked bumble for that reason. You have to do the initial running and take the rejection. At least on tinder it's equal. I think it's a nonsense that the woman messaging first means you're more in charge. It's a gimmick. One that doesn't work! And tinder is not for hook ups. Unless you want it to be....

At least on tinder it's equal. I think it's a nonsense that the woman messaging first means you're more in charge. It's a gimmick. One that doesn't work! And tinder is not for hook ups. Unless you want it to be....

Ah I may have been taken in... I like the idea that I was in charge, but that's useless if it doesn't deliver!

Hae got Tinder too but no bites on there.

Confirmed UTI, 8 days of anti-b's, sample being sent for testing and lots of pain.

Off to pick up prescription and cook for the kids when all I want is to go to bed.

Being single is shit 😭

I like bumble and it doesn't bother me either way about messaging first. I don't even see it as a control thing. The only problem with bumble is, they have 24 hours to reply. If they miss that it's gone. So not always because they blanked you.

I'd send someone a message on tinder. To me there is no power either way. You have already matched so kinda declared you like the look of each other.

I'm baffled by the amount of UTI's from sex. I've never had one from too much sex and I've certainly had nights/days of it. Is this a goal I'm aiming for 😂😂

I never felt ‘in charge’ on bumble.

Actually it felt more like it delegated the work component to the woman. So it was like pre-relation wifework. 😂

@Crustaceans re Bumble. Oh yes! I'm on it at the moment and have nine matches. Two could expire by tomorrow. The rest I've started conversations with, had replies but they've stalled. All the conversations are in the men's courts now. So either they're not interested and chatting to someone else, enjoy the thrill of the chase, get nervous because they're dealing with a real woman who actually likes to converse 🙄 or get an ego trip collecting matches (may or may not be married etc). It's the not knowing I hate. I'm tempted to send a "piss or get off the pot" message to them all. Either way, I'm in the same position whether they take umbrage at that and unmatch me, or whether they continue to ignore me.

OkCupid has yielded good results for me, but the website is frustrating and the app is worse apparently (going by reviews).

pre-relation wifework 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Don’t aim for sex-related UTIs. I’ve never experienced this issue (although I’d heard about it on MN).

I’m certainly not expecting sympathy about it.

I'm obviously joking @Crustaceans at 40 I'm def looking to get one. 😂😂

They’re all idiots @NestOfSwipers. Because we all know you give good message. 😂

@lifegoes I think it’s be best to aim for all the sex without the need to pee urgently.

Just had a quick peek on Tinder. WHY do they all look like Gordon Ramsay chewing wasps?????

My aim at the moment is to stop attracting narcissists or pure dickheads tbh @Crustaceans

@Crustaceans I'm so using that on my profile blurb!

"Hey, I give good message. If you want to see me in action, you know what to do, boys... 😉"