Dating thread 160: fallen in love with someone you shouldn’t have fallen in love with

[CassettesAreCool]

The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating.

1. Develop a thick skin.
2. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
3. It's all BS until it actually happens.
4. Trust your gut instinct.
5. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
6. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
7. If it's not fun, stop.
8. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

15/05/2019 19:56

Oh i really want to go on holiday on my own... for those going away, where are you going? (Sorry if you have said)

@Lovemusic33 I agree with others, he isn't meeting your needs. That won't ever change so let him go now.

I'm the first to admit when I'm feeling a bit low I really cling to OLD and searching for someone. When I don't find it I feel worse. So now I'm going to use the apps as more fun and just filling some boredom time rather than focusing on them.

Lovemusic it does sound like Mr Dog is not the man for you. He should be there for you after the loss of your beloved pooch, not hiding away making excuses about being tired.

Good luck to those of you off on your hols. Hope you have a fantastic time and maybe the odd holiday romance .

My date last night went really well. I had zero expectations and I was pleasantly surprised when I met him as he looked much better than his photo. He was funny, left wing, good company and very complimentary to me without being sleazy. We both agreed that we would like to see each other again so fingers crossed. Of course that little demon that sits on my shoulder is telling me that he won't get in contact again but I am ignoring the negative self talk that it is spouting. It is lovely and sunny today so I will go out for the afternoon, wander around the shops and have a nice coffee somewhere. And I will try hard not to text him and ask if he wants to meet me in town. The ball is in his court as I texted him when I got home, thanking him for a lovely evening.

I have re activated my POF profile. I miss going in proper dates (out to eat) and I’m missing the evening texting. Mr Dog is just not trying very hard, just expects things to land in his lap without putting in the effort. I will arrange to go out with Mr Banter maybe next weekend, he has been messaging me and been trying to cheer me up after losing my dog. I don’t want anything too serious, just someone to go out with once or twice a week.

Excellent news @LilyRose88 after feeling low yesterday. I must admit my date earlier in the week came off a similar feeling of angst about the whole thing. Fingers crossed !

I just had another date. I find the follow date always more nerve wracking because there is that element of thinking maybe the chemistry won’t be reproducible and therefore there is something to lose. Well, I’m happy to tell the thread she was utterly breathtaking on arrival and my nerves melted away. If the first date was ‘squee!’ this was ‘squee!’ to the power ‘squee!’. With bells on.

So Mr Hopeheisntadrunk mailed me to say he didn't feel we were right for each other due to his living situation and not being ready to date. Why was I so chicken to say the same to him! I need to rethink what I'm looking for me thinks as I'm just not feeling anything for anyone but am so ready to date.

@HairyArsedMan great news! Again, I bloody wish someone would think that about me.

I think we all want that @Eesha. We just need to keep positive about it.

But don't settle in the process either, if you don't feel it or your gut is screaming it's not right here. Trust those feelings and move on to the next.

Oh hairy I wish someone was thinking that about me! Glad you had a super time

lifegoes I am going to Italy. Planning to do a bit of train/ ferry hopping and really make the most of not having two tiny dc in tow

So jealous @Marlboroandmalbec34 Italy is a beautiful place and so much to see

@HairyArsedMan so pleased for you as the second date can be a bit of a minefield. And thank you for your kind words. Here's hoping I get a second date with my Friday night guy.

@Eesha sorry to hear that your iron didn't work out for you. I'm sure your time will come and you will find a guy who loves and adores you .

@Lovemusic33 It sounds like a fun date is exactly what you need. Hope Mr Banter lifts your spirits a bit.

Hairy really pleased for you!!!

Nothing romance wise to report, just been round for an evening with my two best friends (couple) who knew I was struggling a bit with some stuff going on with my ex, and had seen me getting more and more stressed and angry. I was on the verge of cancelling my Monday date thinking I've got enough going on atm.
But they've convinced me not to let my ex's behaviour put my life on hold and to go and see how it pans out.
Been a tough week this last 7 days with feeling crappy about dumping MissOz and then other stuff with my ex to deal with.
But onwards and upwards 😉

@Ant330 Have you heard any more from Miss Oz?

I am home now from my holiday and meeting up with MrArt later on. Not sure how I feel about it (apart from the usual nerves) due to his and my situations being quite different but it has to be worth meeting him..?

I'm feeling refreshed after my break and raring to get into a healthier mindset. I was eating/drinking too much and not exercising enough before I went and my occasional smoking was getting more and more frequent but I know I feel better if I don't do so much of that stuff so just waiting for true supermarket to open and I'm going to do a healthy shop. Even if my date if crap, I will have something to focus on!

@HairyArsedMan That's great news, really happy for you.

@Lovemusic33 I agree about Mr Dog. You are worth more than that.

I’ve read on here that some of you review profiles and I wonder if someone could look at mine. But how do I send Tinder link or is it just cut and paste? I don’t say much and I’m told my photos don’t do me justice but I really don’t know where to start. I’m old with young kids so I guess that is not a great start anyway; but I do have a lot to give....

Thanks @shitwithsugaron. I'm currently in the car park waiting for the supermarket to open!

Could I join in the health kick please? Could do with the accountability

I'm using my ex as motivation to kick my arse into gear (I know, I know it should be about me). But to get me back into shape I'm determined to do it. So I can go "yep look what you fucked over"

Hello peeps,

I'm feeling quite deflated in the sun about this dating mallarkey. I really don't know why but struggling to feel any sort of spark with any dates. I'm beginning to think it's me. The pattern is the same, get on great beforehand, meet up, I always have a nice date but then don't feel that interested. I sometimes think I'm meeting up just to have a fun night out but just not meeting anyone I click well with.

Its not you @Eesha I'm struggling to find a spark or something with anyone also. I'm not going on dates though, as if I'm not feeling it beforehand I'm not going. I don't see the point of wasting both our times.

I'm trying to just take away the focus on swiping as much. I'm focusing on feeling good again about myself, I know the spark is there with someone as I've had it. So just swiping when I'm in a positive mood

I've deleted my pof account today,I just seemed to be getting nowhere.
I was messaging a few but conversation was dull and I felt it was me trying to keep it going. Someone I dated a few years ago got back in touch and suggested a drink today and I said ok and mentioned a pub a few miles from me. His reply was could I come to his town as he knows a pub with a great garden if I was to bring the dog.
I just dont feel,what's the word...pursued? By anyone at the moment,I know it's all 50 50 these days but I've had enough so a few weeks off will do me good
I just