My bookmark didn’t work trying to post an update and, while I was scrolling, I re-read a bit regarding last years discussions about Christmas.
I wish I’d looked at it in November which you’ll appreciate after I catch you up.
Too many ridiculous accusations to count including, but not restricted to, my using the dc as messengers, denying them a family Christmas, and refusing him parental access.
He retaliated with what I perceived as a threat.
Be advised that until arrangements are made for Boxing Day, nothing else is confirmed. Prior suggested dates (which he’d agreed to cover whilst I was working) can’t be finalised until this matter is also accounted for.
I called his bluff by asking him outright if he was refusing to provide childcare while I was working.
He replied saying he didn’t provide childcare.
I clarified that his previous Boxing Day contact was based on the fact I was working. And that, as I wasn’t contracted to work, and it was my weekend, I wasn’t denying him anything.
Then I asked again if he was reneging in his previous agreement to cover my shifts and, if so, could he reply ASAP so I could put my alternative childcare in place.
Asshole replied...
“However, you have left me in a position where you are saying that rather than allowing us our family Christmas, you would seek out childcare, resulting in them losing other holiday time here and increasing our covid risk. I just can't do that, so I therefore confirm that I will accept the holiday contact previously set out,”.
Successful bluff calling on my part but he’d also chucked another threat into the mix by saying if I couldn’t understand the basics of what “agreement” means, then “we will clearly need court assistance again.
Threat number 2.
I responded thanking him for reconfirming the childcare arrangements.
I said his comments had been noted but he’d said nothing that he hadn’t already said and that it didn’t change the fact that Christmas falls in my weekend as new year falls on his.
That was send on Sunday morning and I’ve had no reply as yet. I’ll bet money on it coming as soon as the dc are in bed at his tomorrow night when I won’t see them till Christmas Eve.
I’m so glad the bf was here. He’s excellent at discarding all the bullshit and he can help me remove the emotional content of my replies and stick to the facts.
Once I’d got past the threat to withdraw care on my working days, essentially threatening my job and mine and the dcs livelihood, he did say I wouldn’t have to worry about him threatening me next year. When I asked him why he said “because I’ll kill him before then” 
I fucking love Christmas. Not.