Dating thread 150 - I get knocked down, but I get up again....

[DaffoDeffo]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Thanks for the advice and the warnings . I'll give it a try.
Good luck with all your OLD.

@CassettesAreCool Yes, Mr Plumber asked how long I'd been single when we first started chatting- I said 2 hours 🙈. As far as he's concerned MrAbs loss is his gain.

It may turn into something, it may just be a bit of fun. Life's short and I'm going to make the most of it before I start tucking my boobs into my waistband and worry about laughing/sneezing for fear of wetting myself 😂 My mother of course is horrified and thinks there should be some period of mourning my lost relationship before I move on. Why? So I can beat myself up about being unloveable? Tear myself apart wondering how I can improve myself and what I could have done differently? I just wasn't right for him, it doesn't mean I wont be right for someone. x

JeSuis Mr Plumber sounds cool and so do you. Good luck.

I might send him a message tonight saying something along the lines off “the sex is great but that’s not all I’m looking for” I don’t want to write too much or I will get carried away and it will just piss me off, I have told him before that it’s not all about the sex and his reply was “I enjoy your company too”. I really want to tell him that “if it’s just sex then I will soon get bored, especially when it’s only available on your terms which isn’t often enough, if I wanted a fuck buddy im sure I could find one closer to home that’s more available” but that’s probably too much?

Lovemusic if that's what you want to say then just say it. It will either be the kick up the backside he needs to make more of an effort or lose you, or it will just show he doesn't want what you do. His loss if that's the case.
Currently it sounds like it's all on his terms, grab some control back.

Thanks, I might need some Dutch courage to send it.

Love just say it but don't say "if it's sex I will get bored".
Instead say "this relationships seems to be just about sex for you and I'm bored of that especially....."

love I actually like the hard message. If someone's not getting the message sometimes the only way is to go nuclear. Ya know? Just say it like it is. He either gets his act together or he lets you move on

Aw jesuis I’m sorry. You had sounded so happy although perhaps now you can see Mr Abs wasn’t all that. And a big yes to getting back out there. I did just the same. Do you think you and Mr A will have a hard close or will there be a bit of messing about?

lovemusic trying to pressure you to give up your and DDs Friday night plans was pretty rubbish I think. Especially as he’s not even clear what he’s doing the rest of the weekend. I was majorly pissed off that Mr S was happy for me to go there but didn’t offer to come here when I said I couldn’t as we are now both busy the rest of the weekend. I think he knows he made a bad choice though! I definitely think you need the chat as I can see you are tying yourself in knots. Are you still on the apps and talking to any others?

Mr Ginger made a porn Alexa joke last night and my vagina froze over. How do you all end WA chats that you don’t think are for you?

notcool just say politely that you don't think you are compatible but you wish him well. No need to give the reason.

love please send the hard message as it is what you want to say. I strongly think this guy is not for you and never will be. The sooner you rip the plaster off, the better. Move on.

Love jeez the guy just sounds like a sex pest. Don’t get me wrong, I love sex and if all you wanted was a FB he might (and I mean, might) fit the bill.

But you want more than that and despite telling him so, he’s ignoring your needs and focusing solely on his. Sulking because you didn’t want a booty call?

Fuck that shit.

JeSuis I’m sorry to hear about MrAbs. Enjoy Mr Plumber, and ride him like Seabiscuit 😁

My FWB+ has just left, we’ve had 18 hours together and it was amazing. Dinner, drinks, and more orgasms than I can count on all my fingers and toes 😳😳👍🏻👍🏻

I’m falling for him though... but we did have a deep conversation over dinner about where we’re “at” and I think we’re both roughly in the same place.

Hello everyone, it's been a while but I've been slowly cracking on! Been on a couple of dates and I've tried to take a lot of the advice on here like meeting soon, dealing with ghosting etc.

I find the ghosting really hard to deal with - I can have a long conversation with someone over a couple of days and feel a connection, ghosting even comes up and they say 'I won't do that because I'm not a dick' and then guess what, they disappear! Why?!

I've seen someone a few times and I like him but I don't think I like him enough. We've had a lovely kiss (for like an hour in the rain!) but I don't think we're compatible in the long term... I really enjoy spending time with him but I'm feeling pressured to continue/take it further and I don't feel that massive desire to. And I kinda want that because I've had it before and know it exists and I don't want to settle with something mehhh. I told him after we kissed that I don't really know what I want... any advice?!

I really hate upsetting people so tend to put their feelings first and I can tell he really likes me. So I feel like a bit of a cow.

@Notcoolmum No it's properly finished, there's no need for our paths to cross again. No shared friends/social media etc and he lives 20 miles away. He has messaged me a couple of times to make sure I'm OK (because he's a nice guy and feels like a shit) but I don't hate him, he did me a favour in the long run - boosted my confidence, made me feel great about myself, he was a great guy, I just wasn't what he wanted and I'm glad he was honest with me sooner rather than later.

So tomorrow with MrPlumber I will be the complete sex goddess that he thinks I am and I've got MrAbs to thank for that 🙈.

Have just watched I Feel Pretty on Netflix - absolutely brilliant and life affirming stuff, just what I need today.

Hey guys, it's been a while but wanted to pop in and ask your advice!

Firstly though JeSuisPrest I'm really sorry to hear about Mr Abs, break ups are always going to be difficult. Maybe it's your chance to see the grass is actually greener and it seems so with Mr Plumber. Good luck for your date this weekend, and I think you're amazingly brave to jump back on the horse a couple of hours after it ending!

So my question is basically, how much is too much to see each other?! Me and Miss B&B are inseparable now, we're full steam ahead and it feels like years we've been together and it's only six weeks! She met my sister and our close friend this week and got on great, and both of our families know about each other. At the moment, we see each other four times a week, three are for about four/five hours and then one overnight stay on Sunday evenings. Is this normal for people at this stage?! I worry in my overthinking brain it's too much too soon but honestly...it doesn't feel like I see her enough! Once a week we will go out and have a normal date and the other times we stay in and cook and watch bingeworthy tv shows. I just need to know if our behaviour is normal as I'm massively overthinking!

jesuis sorry to hear about the break up. I do find 3-6 months is when you really start knowing whether it will work or not...at least he told you and didn't just disappear and well done for getting back on it. I'm sure your mother means well and just doesn't want you to get hurt again!

auba there's no right or wrong. If it feels right for both of you, then go for it!

auba doesn’t sound too much to me - all sounds great!

Just back from my coffee date with Mr Footballer. It was nice, he was polite and easy to talk to and of course HOT! He seems keen and I should be- he ticks all the boxes but I cannot get Mr S out of my head. What is wrong with me?!

Thanks guys, I knew you'd make me feel better

30Something As an absolutely massive football fan I'm really intrigued as to who it is. At first I was thinking Peter Crouch 😂 Until I remembered he's married and definitely not good looking! Can you PM me and tell me who it is?! I keep thinking Kieran Gibbs too but he looks quite young and I'm surprised he could meet now as there's a full football programme today. A footballer would be my dream can you tell?! Anyway, it'll take some time to get Mr S out of your head but what better way than with a footballer.

Can I just say that sidges comment of ride him like seabiscuit made me laugh out loud and spit my Costa out 😂

Auba14 I'm not sure there's any definition of normal really, depends on working patterns, children, how far away you live etc. etc. I've agreed to be exclusive with my (no longer) fwb today but we'll still struggle to see each other more than twice a week until he's met my daughter and me his.

likeridingabike For is, neither has children. She has the B&B which obviously takes up a lot of time and I have work. So it means even if we stay in watching telly, we have plenty of opportunities to do that and I say this like the love struck 15 year old I feel like now...we both spend the time we are apart wanting to be together again and everything feels like a countdown until we will.
It's the first time I've ever felt this way in my life, someone who I could rip their clothes off in a heartbeat but want to care for and look after and be with all of the time so I don't want to fuck it up. We do do whatever we feel is right, and four times a week is our normal dating pattern now so looks like it will be what we stick with. I'm really pleased I've spoken about it on here today as I felt like I was overthinking it, and when I do that I doubt it.

No, definitely not peter crouch! He is very private and was reluctant to tell me his name and profession to begin with.. he's not your typical 'hot' footballer, he's tall, quite muscular, bearded and has big hands
I can't say I'm a football fan so I did not know who he was until I googled him. Apparently they have no game today hence why he could meet albeit briefly.
Anyway, he's text and invited me to his tomorrow night. It would be rude to say no, right? (We did meet on fab and only looking for fwb) I'll get get over Mr S by getting under Mr footballer