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H is an animal

264 replies

Wheredoistartwiththis · 14/02/2019 22:09

I have obviously name changed for this post and still shaking with disbelief and rage.

I have just gone downstairs from having my shower to find h with his cock over the sink and presumably about to wash it. He jumped when he realised I was there and the first thing out his mouth was oh I was going to wash the sink after!

I stood there in disbelief for a while and then became very angry. In the sink was my mug and a few bits of cutlery. I was so angry with his that I slapped him, I am ashamed with myself for doing this but I slapped him hard. I wash dishes that I prepare our children's food on in there. He also insists on brushing his teeth in the kitchen sink and we've argued over that before, he think I am completely unreasonable in this upsetting me.

He is now denying it completely saying I am seeing things. I am upstairs shaking with anger. I plan to show him this thread so he can see that I am not unreasonable for getting angry with his hygiene habits. There was no need for him to do this, we have a lovely bathroom for him to wash his cock in.

OP posts:
artisanscotcheggs · 14/02/2019 23:42

@ChakiraChakra you COW I am dying of laughter here 😹😹😹

nocoolnamesleft · 14/02/2019 23:42

Someone is clearly taking the piss. Whether it be the OP or their partner remains unclear/

ChakiraChakra · 14/02/2019 23:43

@peekyboo

Robocock. That's what's in Inspector Gadget's pants.

IDoN0tCare · 14/02/2019 23:44

Whether or not OP is genuine, I just can’t believe how many people think it’s ok to wash a dick in a sink! I’m taking a flask with me, every time I go to any friend’s for coffee. 🤢

MumsyJ · 14/02/2019 23:45

I've never laughed so hard! Some PPs are comedy gold 🤣🤣

Daffodilshootsahoy · 14/02/2019 23:45

Ewww.. now I'm imagining a floppy foreskin picking up a beaker. Similar in the way an elephant would pick up something with its trunk.. but a pink, floppy veiny trunk.

peekyboo · 14/02/2019 23:45

@ChakiraChakra Well, sign me up for the fan fiction then!

peekyboo · 14/02/2019 23:46

@Daffodilshootsahoy
Don't forget to also imagine David Attenborough.

ChakiraChakra · 14/02/2019 23:48

*Daffodilshootsahoy

Ewww.. now I'm imagining a floppy foreskin picking up a beaker. Similar in the way an elephant would pick up something with its trunk.. but a pink, floppy veiny trunk

Don't be daft, it's grey and robotic!

Daffodilshootsahoy · 14/02/2019 23:48

"And now, we see the male of the species reaching for what is known as the penis beaker"

Elephantina · 14/02/2019 23:49
ChakiraChakra · 14/02/2019 23:51

"He extends his cock slowly, not wanting to frighten away his intended mate. He must stealth sink dive, for if she catches him, he risks a sharp slap."

AzraiL · 14/02/2019 23:51

He's disgusting, but so are you.

ALargeGinPlease · 14/02/2019 23:54

Elaphantina Well, if you've got one of those fancy taps that can spray the water upwards, otherwise you'll just have to wash your vulva... This is MN after all and we won't have you calling a vulva a vagina. You could probably manage with one of those long handled brushes.

ChakiraChakra · 14/02/2019 23:54

Well, sign me up for the fan fiction then!

It would have to be a prequel. I've heard he's a little rusty now.

ChakiraChakra · 14/02/2019 23:56

Is Elephantina short for Elephant Vagina, and if so does that make it easier or harder to wash in the sink?

peekyboo · 14/02/2019 23:57

Any good woman would climb right into that sink and wash it for him.

TooOldForThis67 · 14/02/2019 23:57

Another one for MN Classics?

Daffodilshootsahoy · 14/02/2019 23:57

Great. Now every time I see the advert for the posh tap that has a hose extension I'm just gonna be thinking "mmmhm. Expensive douche".

You'd have to be very careful not to put it on the hot setting.. can you imagine 😖

PlinkPlink · 14/02/2019 23:58

I had an ex that would piss in the bathroom sink... despite the toilet literally being right next to it.

I'm not quite sure why he did but I was pretty grossed out by it... it was his flat so I guess I wasn't as bothered as you. If he'd done it in my sink I'd have been a bit miffed!

bert3400 · 15/02/2019 00:00

I see your beaker, I raise you with my sink

penisbeakers · 15/02/2019 00:00

WHO HATH SUMMONED THE MIGHTY PENISBEAKER

ALargeGinPlease · 15/02/2019 00:00

Well, if Elephantina is a cross between an elephant and a vagina, she could douche herself with her trunk.

TooOldForThis67 · 15/02/2019 00:02

When I was much much younger I used to get up in the night and pee in a jug and pour it down the kitchen sink. I didn't want to wake everyone up by flushing the loo Grin

Penissink · 15/02/2019 00:05

STEP BACK PUNY BEAKER!! FOR IT IS I
THOU HATH NO POWER HERE!!!