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Original poster

Dating Thread 146 - Swipe Left Swipe Right

999 replies

MyOldBrainStoppedWorking · 28/01/2019 12:29

Dating thread rules:

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin.
  3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
  5. Trust your gut instinct.
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
  8. If it's not fun, stop.
  9. Loo update is mandatory.
10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

OP posts:
supercali77 · 02/02/2019 18:11

@tooold none of us know what we're doing! Haha. It's what makes it so fun/crap.

shitwithsugaron · 02/02/2019 18:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TooOldForThis67 · 02/02/2019 18:39

supercali - fun, lol.
shitwithsugar - wouldn't it be fun if everyone who was looking for dates, when out, had a microchip in them giving their /details/status! Lol. Or am I just weird!

MrBirdsEye replied with, just wanted to see what you were up to. What!!
So, I replied, 'as in, am I free?' No response yet. Still no response from my msg to MrYoung. An hour to go and haven't eaten or got dressed yet, I'm in such a pickle.

supercali77 · 02/02/2019 18:57

I went out irl last night and got hit on by 3 pissed danes over for the footy. I have to be honest. . It was worse than a dick pic

shitwithsugaron · 02/02/2019 19:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Auba14 · 02/02/2019 19:20

I feel like I have it easy compared to everyone else!

I met someone on Tinder months ago, and we still haven't met! But this is all because every time we try to something comes up - like on Wednesday I had flu and wouldn't have subjected them to that 🙄 And the snow is putting paid to any chance we have at the moment.

But it all feels so easy, I don't get paranoid when I don't get a message back and I just wait, it might be a couple of days but that's just because they're busy or I'm busy. We both know people in common who say we are suited so it's just finding that time to actually have that it elusive date. I have to hand it to you guys, I really don't know how you do it because half of the stuff mentioned on here just sounds crazy behaviour.

I think the moral of it is, if my story is anything to go by, that when it's right it will feel right and there won't be all of this will he won't he message stuff - you'll just know and not be beside your phone worrying. And Confused please please please do not ever message this man again, at first I could understand why you wanted to but then I read about what happened after and it was just sex to him, have the upper hand. Again if he wanted to get in touch with you he will. There won't be any second guessing when it's the right person!

Bluezoo123 · 02/02/2019 20:20

tooold did you hear from mr young about tonight’s date in the end?
shit sounds promising
auba when are you meeting?
I originally was looking for a relationship but happy for a fwb if found someone suitable for that in the meantime but what I’ve ended up with atm is in effect a bf without the benefits.dont know what the fuck’s going on but have been integrated in to his life in terms of meeting family friends etc and have dtd a few times but that was weeks ago and now haven’t dtd again in weeks...going to have to have a serious talk about it soon (not that I haven’t already tried raising the issue) as I’m seriously sexually frustrated atm and feeling undesirable.i gave him an out but he assures me it’s not me,blaming illnes/tiredness etc...but seriously?!never been in this position before...

supercali77 · 02/02/2019 21:13

@coco this is when it would be great to know an ex gf on good terms to ask...if this is a thing. Some men seem to be less highly sexed than women...i think I saw a graph Showing mens sex drive peaks in the 20s and women in the 40s?

BatshitCrazyWoman · 02/02/2019 21:52

Maybe TooOld is on her date ....

Well I seem to have fallen back onto OKC and have been chatting to a nice chap ... he's gone a bit quiet now, typically. Not sure if it's worth giving him a nickname!

Have had a couple of messages from men describing themselves as doms too ... Hmm

singleascheeseslice · 02/02/2019 21:53

Quick Tinder question... Does anyone just unmatch folk mid chat if you're not feeling them or do you tell them its not gona work? I'd feel rude but I also don't want any comeback from them. Thoughts?

Lovemusic33 · 02/02/2019 22:09

My young (someone I met a few months ago) keeps messaging me almost every day asking when we can meet up, it was only ever a FWB thing as he is much younger than me and has a young child. I really like him (mainly his alearence), we met a couple times and DTD but he was really rough with me, obviously watched a lot of porn so I haven’t met up with him since, it’s a shame because other than him being awful in the bedroom everything was good. How do you tell someone that they need to calm it down a little? Is it even worth trying?

I haven’t heard from Mr South African today, unsure when dare no 2 will be or if it will ever happen.

ccgirr · 02/02/2019 22:10

Confused- I feel like I could have met same guy in a car wanted to drive round and immediately try it on. Got the d out! I managed to escape. Please try put him behind you.
I’ve been casually dating someone for few months and it seems good but he doesn’t talk about how he feels at all. Finding it hard to know where I’m at Confused

Auba14 · 02/02/2019 22:28

Single When I had Tinder I used to unmatch quite quickly if I wasn't feeling how I should when messaging. So I'd unmatch after a few messages if it was text speak, the conversation taking a turn down a road it shouldn't. Honestly you don't owe someone you've sent a few messages an explanation, just unmatch!

singleascheeseslice · 02/02/2019 23:20

thanks so much for replying Auba I have now deleted most of the chats I was having, they were lecherous and just not right. I have since figured out how to make my settings 40-50 (it was my damn nails not letting me move the slider!) and I also adjusted mile radius a little bit and now I am matching with some real hotties! If only they'd be traditional men and message first... I am old fashioned in that way. I like to be pursued. Might write it on my profile actually...

Auba14 · 02/02/2019 23:39

Single Not to take my advice as I'm probably the worst person ever for it, but I wouldn't start putting a list of wants and needs on your profile - if they're a suitable partner and have an interest in you, they will message first. It won't require any effort or you telling them what they need to do/the person they need to be to be suitable for you. I think it gets off on the wrong foot when people have a list of wants as the suitor automatically turns themselves into a different person to be appealing to you and you never quite know who is being the real them.

To be honest though, my profile on Tinder read "I only signed up to this so I could relate to the articles in Cosmopolitan and Grazia'. And it actually seems to work well!

singleascheeseslice · 02/02/2019 23:48

Ah no you're right Abua and I am trying to repel narcs. So giving people heads ups is not the right way to go about it. Also, I dont like reading those ranty profiles where men are essentially hating on women from the off. I'll keep it as is and know that at least anyone who does message first has those values. Thank you again x

singleascheeseslice · 02/02/2019 23:48

*auba x

shitwithsugaron · 03/02/2019 01:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jolee32332 · 03/02/2019 02:09

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supercali77 · 03/02/2019 07:54

Unreasonably excited about my date today. Meeting at 5. Got my dd this morning but being picked up by her dad mid morning. What's everyone else's plans?

BatshitCrazyWoman · 03/02/2019 08:07

Oh dear shitwith I suppose that saves time - no messaging and eventually meeting only to find out it's a no!

I agree with Auba lists of wants are off-putting, probably for both sexes. My iron messaged me very late last night (was in A&E with a family member all evening). He seems very straightforward so who knows. If he keeps messaging and doesn't disappear I'll call him Mr Irish ...

I had a lovely message from another guy, and his profile is great, but (and I feel so shallow!!) his first name is one I can't imagine saying 'in the throes' as it were Blush

BatshitCrazyWoman · 03/02/2019 08:10

My friend who I was meeting for coffee and a catch up today has cancelled on me so I'm going out for a coffee and mooch in the shops anyway, then plan to workout then finish filling in my son's PIP form. Such a thrilling day Grin

supercali77 · 03/02/2019 08:16

@batshit can't beat a mooch round the shops!

shitwithsugaron · 03/02/2019 09:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BatshitCrazyWoman · 03/02/2019 09:06

Oh no - voices are very important! Good luck with Mr Hilarious - sounds like you'll have a great time with him.

supercali where are you going for your date?