Talk about difficult, this dating lark is like Rubik’s Cube!
That is a good analogy. Except that with rubik’s Cube you can buy a book that tells you how to actually do it. 😆
Dating is just bloody hard and it is about figuring out what you want as you go along - and in relation to who you meet. And hoping that they’re figuring things out in the same direction as you.
I love a bit of Netflix and chill too. But more once it’s a ‘thing’ rather than in the figuring out period.
@DogDayMorning The feeling vulnerable, and allowing yourself to be, is really hard. Or, at least, I find that tough. I’m one of those stupidly independent types generally, and I have come out of a terrible relationship, so it’s not something that I found easy. But, there’s no way to avoid it; you can’t actually form a meaningful relationship without opening yourself up to someone else and that necessarily makes you vulnerable.
Maybe that kind of thing translates as ‘emotionally unavailable’ in some instances. Or it might feel like it to someone where you just don’t have enough of that elusive ‘spark’ (whatever it is) or the possibility of ‘catching feelings’ to make you feel able to open up like that.
I guess in the rubik’s cube metaphor, it’s about getting one side totally right so you start to tackle the other sides. Because when you start doing that it does mess up your nicely finished side in the process and you have to trust that it’ll all come together. And then, once you’ve got the ‘top’ and ‘sides’ done, you need to tackle the bottom, which is even harder. But if you don’t feel that you’re getting the top done, you just can’t even begin to think about tackling the rest of the puzzle.