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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Am I in the wrong?

169 replies

LauraS92 · 04/01/2019 18:13

Hello I am new to this forum and need to vent and ask some advice please
My names laura and Im a mother of one and expecting my second next month
I don’t know if it’s my
Hormones or I’m having a rational feeling of guilt. I met my boyfriend a year ago and we never used anything and I got pregnant ( my other child is diff father) my boyfriend had a fling with another woman and got her pregnant too, ( before he met
Me) he didn’t see the child and to be honest I didn’t want him to am I a horrible person? He has been very hands on with my child and he is now happy we are about to have our first child together but I can’t help wondering if he didn’t want anything to do with the other child will he do the same to me?
He didn’t have any relationship with the other woman and he said he didn’t like her at all just that she was a “pass around f*ck” between him and his friends. He went to her birth and saw her a few times but then stopped, I told him not to talk about her around me and that she wasn’t welcome around my house. Am I a bad person? Will this come back on me ? I just couldn’t stand it that he had a child with someone else and I don’t now why
He loves and adores me and my daughter and does everything for us the only thing he does for his own child is pay support because the other woman went through the proper
Authorities to get regular payment. I’m now worried if we ever split up he will abandon our child too but would he do that seeing as he loves me? And he will be more involved with our child ?

OP posts:
U2HasTheEdge · 04/01/2019 22:23

I really don't know why people are taking this thread seriously. Come on people.

DBML · 04/01/2019 22:25

This thread is obviously a hoax.

No one says shot like this unless they are looking for attention.

DBML · 04/01/2019 22:26

Sad this is that people have genuinely spent time helping op with advice, when they could have been:
A) getting on with their day
B) helping someone genuine

gamerchick · 04/01/2019 22:29

Well tbf they gave a clue with the knowing how to tag thing so early on but new enough to give a name in the first post.

IamFrauBlucher · 04/01/2019 22:31

Wow 😮 you ladies are very harsh

Nope just realistic women with clarity of vision.

He really isn’t a bad person though

He has described the mother of his child as a "pass around fuck" and has completely abandoned a small child and single mother. I'm assuming he's not financially supporting them?

his mom really wanted a grandchild and the ow stopped his mom seeing there child because of him not seeing her how is that fair?

Perhaps she was just sick of being ignored,confused by the grandmother pushing forward but the father not giving two shites and all the drama involved?

my bf absolutely adores me and didn’t feel anything for the other girl so why does that make me the bad person?
Keep convincing yourself of that, if it makes you feel better and sleep at night knowing your child's sibling is getting a shitty deal somewhere.

Yes it does make you a bad person because you're colluding in this feeling of the other woman's make you feel like "the one"

He’s been a great dad to my other child and he’s really keen for us to have this baby together do you really think he will do it to me?

Yes.

do you think he stopped seeing his daughter for me?

Probably. And as a mother how can you look at this man with any respect and future security?

You can't ergo your post.

DaffydownClock · 04/01/2019 22:32

Grubby, sleazy and quite frankly repulsive toe rag isn't he?
As for wanting another baby with him before this one's even born..... You need your head sorted out OP.
Poor, poor children, they don't stand a chance.

MamaLovesMango · 04/01/2019 22:32

The sad thing is, even though there’s hairy hands all over this, there really are people out there just like ‘Laura’ and her bf. I’ve had the displeasure of meeting a few.

Drogosnextwife · 04/01/2019 22:40

Oh ffs, now you are splitting up with him, I thought he was the best guy ever and loved you and your child to bits?

I feel sorry for the children involved in this shit show. Think you really need to Grow up fast.

Bumblebee39 · 04/01/2019 22:50

Yeah my ex was nice to me too, until he wasn't.
The ugly misogynistic side I'd seen in him turned on me.
I wish I'd paid attention to the niggle in my mind while it was still a niggle and not a full blown scream.
When he said "I think some girls ask for it" what he was really doing was warning me They asked to be raped and one day you will too.
This is his mask slipping. Yes he might be good at wearing that mask but he is showing you bits of what's underneath too.
Pay attention while you still can.

There are worse things than being a single parent to 2 kids.

U2HasTheEdge · 04/01/2019 22:55

Good catch about the tag.

ShartOfGold · 04/01/2019 23:49

Please don't let a strange man babysit your child in the future. What were you thinking?

I can't believe you're 26.
If any of this is actually real.

loumumise · 05/01/2019 00:21

This has got to be fake.

BumbleBeee69 · 05/01/2019 00:31

OP he will speak about you this way, when he decides he doesn’t want to be around anymore. Flowers

Anyat212 · 05/01/2019 00:41

He didn’t have any relationship with the other woman and he said he didn’t like her at all just that she was a “pass around fck” between him and his friends. *

I still can’t get passed this comment Hmm if my DP or any man I was with described their exes/flings as that I’d run for the hills, what a disgusting boy he is. I feel this is probably a joke thread but I’m shocked we are the same age OP, I’d have guessed you were much younger, you sound very immature.

GimmeBread · 05/01/2019 08:57

I can't believe this thread is still up. Surely I'm not the only person to report it?

2019already · 05/01/2019 09:01

He’s not a catch OP.

C0untDucku1a · 05/01/2019 10:12

How many weeks are you, Laura?

SparklyMagpie · 05/01/2019 10:26

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Orange6904 · 05/01/2019 12:05

Half an hour of my life I'll never get back.

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