Am I in the wrong?

[LauraS92]

Hello I am new to this forum and need to vent and ask some advice please
My names laura and Im a mother of one and expecting my second next month
I don’t know if it’s my
Hormones or I’m having a rational feeling of guilt. I met my boyfriend a year ago and we never used anything and I got pregnant ( my other child is diff father) my boyfriend had a fling with another woman and got her pregnant too, ( before he met
Me) he didn’t see the child and to be honest I didn’t want him to am I a horrible person? He has been very hands on with my child and he is now happy we are about to have our first child together but I can’t help wondering if he didn’t want anything to do with the other child will he do the same to me?
He didn’t have any relationship with the other woman and he said he didn’t like her at all just that she was a “pass around f*ck” between him and his friends. He went to her birth and saw her a few times but then stopped, I told him not to talk about her around me and that she wasn’t welcome around my house. Am I a bad person? Will this come back on me ? I just couldn’t stand it that he had a child with someone else and I don’t now why
He loves and adores me and my daughter and does everything for us the only thing he does for his own child is pay support because the other woman went through the proper
Authorities to get regular payment. I’m now worried if we ever split up he will abandon our child too but would he do that seeing as he loves me? And he will be more involved with our child ?

I think it’s disgusting that he called her that but she does sleep around a lot and doesn’t seem to care she still sleeps with all of his friends now. While we were only talking before we went out together properly he actually slept with another girl while drunk but he admitted it to me I stormed off and went home and he ran after me crying his eyes out to me. I’ve forgiven it as I know we weren’t actually together and no he doesn’t thankfully have a child from
It. He doesn’t ever speak to me or call
Me names like that and he never has done. I do notice he takes the piss out of his brothers but his family are like that and laugh and say nasty things to each other as “banter”
I think his family are horrible tbh except his mom but she’s only really wanted to now me since I said I was pregnant. It is a mess and I don’t now what to do

This just gets more and more laughable

Agree.. He's 22 and already turned his back on one kid. You both sounds like top people... You mentioned people here were harsh, I guess the truth hits hard. You won't be any different in the end.

she does sleep around a lot and doesn’t seem to care she still sleeps with all of his friends now.
Yeah you are vile too. Probably best that child has nothing to do with either of you.

He doesn’t ever speak to me or call
Me names like that to your face. There, fixed it for you.

So she sleeps around a lot. So does he. The difference is he gets the women he sleeps with pregnant then cuts them off.

So your kids father doesn’t bother with her but has gone on to have another child.

You know how it feels to be on the receiving end but have been complicit in the same thing?

What can you do? You need to raise your self esteem and expectations to ensure that once Guy no 2 leaves you holding the baby (which he will) that you don’t repeat the same mistake.
And he sounds vile. So what if she was sleeping around, he cannot have been that disgusted if she shagged her without a condom.

I know that in understand he’s just as bad and I don’t mean it nasty towards her I just mean he called her that as that’s what she was doing and still does now

And so does he - he seems to shag anything that moves. He's a pass around fuck too if she is. He's a slag, basically.

So what if she does?

You think he thought so much of you. Not so much that he didn't have sex with someone else while he was testing the water with you.

There’s nothing wrong with that I say fair play to her and i now he’s just as bad it’s just they called her that and she new about it I’m trying to explain that’s just what he said when I asked about her and what happened between them

Pot calling the kettle black comes to mind with him. How is it ok that he sleeps around but he gets all judgemental that she does. And then we come to his friends. Not scared of sticking their dick in a woman that's had a child from one of their mates. Where are any of the morals in all this? And you think he's wonderful. This has to be a joke.

Well, he's lovely, isn't he? a "pass around fck"*

No it’s just I wouldn’t give into him at first and kept blowing hot and cold he does love me he pursued me and when I found out about that I told him to do one and he couldn’t do enough for me and apologised for months
He has proved he loves me he does everything for us I don’t doubt he loves me I’m just worried he will do the same if we ever split up which I don’t think we will or maybe he might resent me in time for being jealous about his child

One thing that sticks out is when his child was about 5 months old his mother told him
To give some money for her nappies and a new cot he said no then he payed for me to have my hair and nails done like it was nothing to him

Lovely
Please say this is all made up...

His brother also has a “thing” for me and I’ve kind of upset his long term gf about it all as I told her he flirted and my bf doesn’t talk to his brother now over this he must love me to be so protective and to have believed my side

He's 22. He's not going to hang around that long. He's hardly someone you could say had any moral fibre.

@AnyFucker no need to be rude I had dyslexia as a child and have only in the last few years learned to read and write properly.

The minute he referred to a woman, especially one whom he slept with in that way I would have been off as it would tell me how he feels about women.

What did you expect from this thread? Reassurance that you, your relationship and child are different and that he won’t do the same to you?

Of course he is capable of doing it to you, it will be easier for him second time around. It suits him to court you just now hence why he is playing man of the year. If he had truly changed he would be engaging with his first child regardless of the mother he chose for said child.

No, it's not because he loves you more than anything. It's because he's from a family and social set that thrives on drama, fallings out, gossip, arguments, treating women badly. You seem to love it too.

Do you really think you're 'special'?

No amount of explaining from you could ever justify what he said about the mother of his child. You’ve reached the bottom of the barrel there and you’re scraping.

Re your last post; what is it your exactly looking for from this thread?

You really can't be this dim and naive, Laura.

AF