Dating Thread 144: Jingle Bells, Dating Tales, Single All The Way

[DaffoDeffo]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

So I ended it with MrPara tonight. Yes he has Aspergers (autisim spectrum) but there is no excuse for being downright unenthusiastic. I called him out on it, said he was too emotionally immature for me. There is a lot more to it than this, obviously, and I do understand but girls, there are limits!

Nobody is bothered. That is my life atm.

After a yea plus of no periods, I suddenly started to bleed today.

Yes, I'm freaking out.

I've booked a docs appt for tomz.

tooold sorry I hear about mr Para but well done for not letting it drag on. And crazy irregularities are normal for peri menopause- but best to get it checked out if you are concerned

TooOld hope everything goes ok at the docs

thelaststraw that's great news!

I caved and joined POF yesterday. So far I've reported 2 people for abusive messages. It's going well!

@TooOld - hope all goes ok at the doctors. The same thing happened to a friend - she was referred for a scan, nothing was found and it was put down as 'one of those things'. I hope it's the same for you.

I'm still lurking and reading - not ready to go back on OLD yet. I watched this Tedx talk recently

• thought it was interesting ...

tooold I also hope it goes well. And well done for ending it with Mr para when it wasn't right.

I am also lurking and not posting much as not back on OLD.

@thelaststraw123 What a great update.

I'm still firmly smitten with MrAbs. 7 weeks and I've lost count of how many dates. He's definitely a keeper. I unexpectedly got my period on Saturday morning (perimenopausal) whilst at his, and though it wasn't complete carnage the bed needed a clean sheet . He was so lovely - told me to go and jump in the shower and sort myself out, he'd take care of things... By the time I got back to the bedroom, the bed was changed and there was a cup of tea, bacon butty and 2 paracetamol on the bedside cabinet. That's love right there

Nice to see lots of new faces here.

@JeSuisPrest - I need a man like that right now, lol!

tooold bloody hormones. Good luck at the drs today.

jesuispriest def a keeper!

thelaststraw aw. How lovely :)

So I’m tired and emotional as my teen DD has been ill and demanding for a week. My number 1 iron (Mr London) knows but hasn’t been in touch for days. My new iron (Mr Scouser) has been in regular contact and been lovely and supportive...

That’s brilliant @thelaststraw123. Very pleased for you.

That sounds like a good decision for you @TooOldForThis67. Downright unenthusiastic and immature is not going to work. I hope everything goes well at the doctors - we women definitely got the shitty end of the stick as far as reproductive systems go.

Mr Abs sounds great @JeSuisPrest. How lovely that he even thought to get you paracetamol.

Does Mr Abs have any brothers?

JeSuisPrest that is so lovely and thoughtful.

I'm next in line if he has any brothers

@JeSuisPrest definitely the sign of a keeper! I got mine when my third date was due with Mr24 so I sent him a message saying we could rearrange .... he rocked up with pizza donuts and a box set 😍
Glad to hear it's all still going well! ☺️

TooOld the first person I went on a date with (OLD) had Aspergers, my kids both have ASD so I didn’t think it would bother me. He got lost and was late which caused him to have a meltdown, the date was ok once he calmed down but I didn’t fancy him, he then got really nasty with me when I refused to be in a relationship with him, he sent me a horrible long message on messenger calling me a slag and a few other names

So POF seems dead, same old faces and fat bold men. I can’t seem to find anyone that looks remotely normal or genuine, so I have changed my photos on my profile but then realised I don’t have any really recent photos as I look awful in the winter so all my photos are summer ones 🤣, I think people will be disappointed when they meet up with me and my winter body.

Really enjoying all the updates :-) and hearing about those on the smitten bench, gives me hope! Not much to update from me, I'm still off the apps and loving not thinking about it or swiping! Still seeing FWB when I can. And also chatting to my real life iron who I will hopefully meet in 2 weeks.

I'm enjoying the chat between us..light and not every day which is good for me, not too intense.

Mr Ex is still firmly Mr ex. For whatever reason, he wasn't in the right place. I saw my male bestie on Sunday and he really helped me with that

I managed to get my stuff back finally last night. He text me at half 9 to say it was on my door step. I looked straight away and he had gone. I was half expecting him to knock but I do feel better, like it was closure. He is off all my social media pages and I don't feel the need to block him on Whatsapp now. I may change my mind, but I have no reason to right now.

Decided to give swiping a go for a distraction the other night, downloaded Bumble and matched quickly with a few people. Then made myself invisable. Started a few conversations, knowing I am not ready for anything yet and was talking to a guy, who has invited me out in a couple of weeks for drinks with him, his sister and some friends. Not sure whether we will still be talking then but maybe I will gain a friend.

POF question - there's the option to let people see if you have viewed their profile.
I usually have this set to 'no', so I can be nosey without them knowing.

And I see that someone has looked at my profile but hasn't messaged, then I assume they're not interested.

Just wondering what others do.

jesuis tea and bacon butties when needed are what this is all about in the end, so you have struck gold there. So happy for you and loved up thelaststraw

@too old hope it goes okay at the docs.

@Jesuit please please please take a strand of hair from Mr. Abs so we can sneak do to the lab to clone him. Failing that. Does he have brothers? ?? I nearly cred sitting in the doc waiting room reading your update!

shiteithsugaron is Mr U a real friend? Ha there a reason you aren’t more than friends? I have a lovely male friend who I know would like us to be more but the chemistry isn’t there for me. I keep thinking I can overcome it but I can’t.

I’m the same on multi dating. It feels wrong somehow. And also not nice to know that really the only reason I’m doing it is that Mr L doesn’t like me enough to commit/be exclusive. I’d have gone exclusive with him after our third amazing date. And it makes me sad now I’m typing this that he didn’t feel the same.

But Mr S, whilst new and unknown, seems lovely and is meeting my emotional needs in a way Mr L certainly doesn’t so maybe it’s all for a reason. This is showing me what I need in a relationship as opposed to what I will settle for.

MyOld, I get loads of people look but don’t message, I take it that they have read my profile and they don’t think we are suitable (probably have nothing in common), occasionally I will send a message saying “thanks for looking” if I’m feeling a bit cheeky. I probably get around 30 views a day, mostly from people that live 100’s of miles away or people that have young children (my profile states that I don’t want to date someone with young children).

Ahh I found you! This thread had disappeared from my Threads I'm On for some reason!

Glad some of you are smitten, and others are enjoying some new irons.

I'm a bit all over the place, have a few nice guys on the go but I'm not very good at the multiple dating so it doesn't sit comfortably with me. I've not had the exclusive conversation with any of them, we're not at that stage at all, but it just feels weird - I'm definitely naturally monogamous!!

I had a nice situation the other day, I met MrBio for lunch, we then met again for dinner the same day, and he invited me to his the following evening and I stayed over... He is LOVELY but seems to be a perpetual bachelor and isn't one for messaging much and we haven't got another date planned, I think it's a case of playing it cool with him and trying not to overthink.

Mr Mystery is warming up nicely, we met for Sunday dinner and had a good chat about what we're both looking for and some lovely snogging.

Mr Builder is a budding FWB but I actually really like him, so it could get complicated.

Oh and I am meeting Mr Property at the weekend, he's funny and attractive and likes to Snapchat which is a new one on me!!

@shitwithsugaron I too wish I could squish all my guys together to make one perfect man LOL

Hi all,
Good to see some of you on the smitten bench, sorry for those who are having a tough time on OLD. There are a lot of creeps out there!
I have been lurking for a while and not posting because on Xmas Eve I had a brunch date with someone I was very old-fashionedly set up with. Instant attraction and he ended up in bed with me Xmas Eve and spent half of Xmas day with me (before my DD came over). Have since spent a weekend with him. Def on the smitten bench, but... he lives 130 miles away. That may be a good thing, as I don't want anyone in my pocket, and both he and I can work out seeing each other around work trips. Early days but he ticks pretty much every box. As he works for my ex-boss (who is a close friend) he can't really mess me about