Dating Thread 143 Can Anybody Find Meeeee Somebody to Love!

[DaffoDeffo]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

waiting - well done for cutting out the BS.
cool - worst thing about this time of year. Feel like you want someone but so difficult to fit in dates. Strangely enough, MrSolid and I spent last NYE together as we had no one else at the time, lol!
koko - that's a difficult one to read. Is he fobbing you off do you think?
oldbrain - beware! I had a first date with someone like this. He said all his prev dates were much younger, told me where they went/did etc but he said he realised they were taking him for a ride and he now wanted something serious. Was really charming etc. Then ghosted me! I thought he was too good to be true and I was definitely not wordly enough for him I guess.

oldbrain I would properly take the piss out of him. Photoshop a pic of you with a male celebrity somewhere! Honestly what a cock! Why would ANYONE send a pic of their ex!!

Daffo I like that idea!

I've politely told him that were not suited as I'm more likely to be found with dirt under my fingernails than looking glamorous. That will probably make him run a mile

Oh shit, just received this msg from my iron
Him: What do you have planned today?
Me: Probably more Xmas shopping in town!
Him: What about this evening? I have to sign off some stuff for my student at 6pm, not sure if I will be upto meeting after. Must admit I'm keen to see you.

He is a well fit paramedic, no kids, wants a relationship. Another 'sounds too good to be true'. If my past relationship with MrSolid hadn't been so flaky then I wouldn't have even been tempted!!
Shit shit shit. I don't think I can fob this one off. If I don't meet him I might always wonder. I could meet him and it's awful and then I'll feel better, lol.

What am I doing! I've provisionnaly agreed he can pop round tonight. He's DBA cleared so no worries on that score. Hope I don't like him or he doesn't like me then job done.

my old Brain he sounds like a bit of a knob really. Surely no one talks about money that early on. Poor financial situation??? It's a date not an job interview!

You could choose the biggest house on Rightmove near you, and tell him your selling because 'its far too small darling' and you need a tennis court!

No one should ever feel they are beneath anyone. If you like someone you'll see them, wherever that might be that suits you both.

You're the prize remember!

What is it with non committal men. A beautiful lady wants to see you and they are all 'meh' - clearly holding out for a better offer

What's wrong with, I like you you like me, let's go out on a date see what happens, most men can't even seem to get past WhatsApp!

It's a drink FFS not a Vegas wedding!

The whole game playing just doesn't do anything for me, if you are 'meh' about Me just say no thanks! I'm really not gonna be second best.

(Yes I will probably be a self deluded old lady one day, with my Tom Hardy posters and swiping 19 year old guys on tinder )

*Btw this is clearly a PMT rant and more of I can't believe perfectly average men cause so much bloomin angst to amazing women like us!

tooold no I don’t think he was fobbing me off as he messaged since asking to let him know if I’m free for a late night coffee at some point (he works quite long hours) and I said for him to let me know if he ever has a day off on one of my days off to which he replied ‘sure will x’. Btw DBA cleared means little - Me Weekend was DBA cleared but still was a nutter! I’m sure your iron’s fine but just be careful x

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking a brilliant put-down!

Can't respond to everyone else's comments as using the app (unless I'm missing something?) and can't scroll down..

Just wanted to ask though and I think someone else mentioned this before. But Bumble - it's awful feature is that you can track where someone is?! So you can tell when someone is having a "sleepover"..
quite annoying as it brings out the stalker element in me Anyone else do this?

midcentury didn’t realise the tracking thing with bumble-How does that work?!

@daffo I have nye plans with friends that I asked him to join in on, so I didn’t need to. His meh response has really made me feel very differently about him. A yes or nonwas what was expected.

Waiting Fecking annoying isn't it, how hard is it for a grown adult with no child care to sort to make plans to meet someone for a drink? You're right it's like your asking them for long term commitment, it's a cup of coffee FFS.

mid century tracking what?!?!

Argggh why are men so bloody annoying!! So I had my 4th date Saturday night, it was great and we had a lovely time! He still seemed keen etc. Fast forward to now, I've had two msgs from him since that time. The last one being yesterday about 5pm in which I replied to as he asked how I was etc, I replied saying I'd had a stressful day at work and asked him questions - then nothing, no reply, zilch. Ohh but he read it though and was on WhatsApp throughout the night, and online on POF.

So I'm done, number deleted. He makes me feel like I'm not good enough for him, not even to reply it's just rude. 😢😢 I hate men!

@Notcoolmum and @Koko12
The app picks up your location when you open it ie use it and that's what shows on your location at the bottom
Ie I know x lives in (insert town)

Ah ok mid so you’re saying the location/distance at the bottom of their profile changes dependent on where they are at that present time?Never knew that!

Ah ok. Thankfully I don’t really check that once on wattsapp. Although my tinder match, who lives in London but was up here for meetings, showed as 5 mikes away so must have been swiping whilst he was here 😂😂

Omg one of my irons has suggested coffee at lunchtime as he's coming near to me to go shopping! I'm meeting him in 30 mins! No need to get nervous I suppose and I am wearing quite a nice dress today.
Not used to spontaneity!
Also meeting MrEx tomorrow but its feeling a bit like pulling teetth, can't lie

My attempt to politely get rid of Mr Glamour didn't work. Instead he asked me out on a date.
Or more correctly he said he'd like to buy me a drink one evening as he wants to get to know me better. He thinks I'm interesting and beautiful .

He knows what I do for a living and that my life is very different to his. He also knows I'm only looking for something casual/FWB.
So I might meet him for a drink and see what he's like. Although I'm still not impressed that he sent me a photo of his ex.

myoldbrain yeah I'm not sure about sending the photo of the ex but I guess all you can do is see what he's like in person?

@Apparentlyacatch - that is so rude and disrespectful. We all know that we can see when we are on-line and using apps. Bullet dodged!
cool - am impressed you are wearing 'quite a nice dress today' - that never happens to me, lol, jeans with paw prints etc is my normal attire! Hope it goes well. Await update.
koko - that's true! I prev dated a paramedic and lets just say he was a bit weird quite amusing.
So my MrSolid and MrPara are both asleep atm (not together!) as just come off night shifts.

on bumble, I am not sure if it changes automatically or just when you log in to see

I remember falling out with MrMusic very early on as we had a v tentative plan to meet up but he had said he was ill. He lives very near to me and I could see when I looked at our conversation that he was somewhere about 100 miles away. I never said anything at the time but later on when we fell out (because he was so unreliable), I said to him, I knew you were lying. He looked horrified and unmatched me that night . He told me he had gone away to see a friend - I have no doubt that he had - but why not just be bloody honest, this is what I don't get. I wouldn't have cared if he had said I went to see my friend instead as we didn't have firm plans to meet but rather than be honest, he lied and tbh that was one of the very many straws that broke the camel's back!

but I also know on bumble, if you don't open it, it doesn't change

because one of my friends who was on there too asked me out for a drink as they said I was nearby as they had looked at my bumble

but I wasn't, I just hadn't opened it all day

I don't know if they've changed that now to update automatically though I suspect they haven't as you would probably need to open it to get it to look at your GPS

tooold exactly! He's just msged to say sorry he forgot to reply he was busy etc. I just felt like saying your too busy to even msg! Why bother msging me when you have no intentions of a conversation.

I have actually replied but with a much calmer tactful msg but basically stating I get the impression he no longer wants to talk to me which is fine, but I would rather know now than cause any upset later.

oh and a MrD update. We continue to exchange pretty inane messages, like 1 or 2 a day. I've let him know when I'm free, he's not bitten on it. So I suspect my male best mate was right - he's letting it drift, and I should let it drift. I archive the WhatsApp conversation every time so that it doesn't appear when I look at WhatsApp. I suspect the most positive outcome is we will end up occasional friends. The likely outcome is come January, we won't speak to each other again. It's a bit like salting an open wound this but tbh, I don't think I would feel any better by forcing a conversation that he quite obviously doesn't want to have so will continue as is.

notcool I HATE meh responses. Just not good.

cool I am also v impressed with your spontaneity. I didn't shower this morning as I thought I would make gym and didn't so I would be hopeless today!