Dating Thread 143 Can Anybody Find Meeeee Somebody to Love!

[DaffoDeffo]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Ditto mrhardy - has enough of men that don’t have their s**t together and need fixing!

None of us need a man who requires ‘fixing’. That’s definitely not how to have a good relationship.

I went with quirky dress and sparkly tights. Luckily my party was fairly casual. And crap. My friends and I left ridiculously early and went to the pub. Then I went to meet my BF and some of his colleagues. And we came home before midnight but didn’t go to sleep til 2.30.

Sounds like a successful evening twice I’m off out tonight with a friend,won’t be looking for anything but maybe men in RL may be more appealing!I am getting sick of swiping lol&rarely swipe right as there doesn’t appear to be much of quality on there

Thought I'd better come on and post an update after last weekend where Mr S and I finally dtd after 3 months!! Well... it wasn't great but we had both had a lot to drink and he kept saying how nervous he was. Anyway, we saw each other in the week and managed a repeat performance which was much better than the first! We've had a good chat, he has said he "really" likes me and so let's see. I've been here before so I'm approaching with caution.

change sounds promising and hopefully the sex will get better the more you have it and get to know each other’s bodies.

Has anyone heard from Scot after her date with Mr Italy?

change - that sounds really promising! As long as the sex isn't so bad that you wonder if they're in then it can be improved with practice! Lol.
I was so spoilt with MrWow sighs again.

Hello folks, sorry, another Bumble question.

So, I have just made a proper profile, and have actually (gasp) swiped right on some men! Now, I notice that if I click on the message icon, I have several profiles (who "like" me, apparently) in my "match queue", but I can't see or access them unless I pay (which I don't want to do).

Would this be blokes who have liked me but I haven't liked them? I don't have anything telling me that (gasp!) there is a mutual match, and I have to message them within 24 hours......

stubborn, match queue means you need to keep swiping as you will have some matches in that pile. You can pay to access them but I don't bother.

Once you have a mutual match, they will be in bubbles across the top and then you can message them within 24 hours.

Oh god... Think Mr Red and me have just split up. There was a big change today and I had an uneasy feeling so asked him what was up. Apparently he feels like there's something stopping him feeling 100% with us with everything going on. Could be guilt... Said it wasn't fair on me all he said was 'I know'. Feeling pretty shitty right now 😔

So sorry push

Hope you're ok. Sounds like he wasn't in the right place

How long had you been together now?

Two months @DaffoDeffo I know it's not long and I probably got too over involved too soon but it bloody hurts.

@Pushreset I'm sorry that it hasn't worked out. These things always hurt.

maybe men in RL may be more appealing!

Hopefully. I'm sure you'll have fun with your friends anyway.

@changeoflife I agree that the sex should always improve as you get to know each other. Hopefully.

Quick question. Do any of you use your real phone number when OLD? My friend told me I need to get a 2nd phone ASAP as my real number is a no no! Really don't want to get another smartphone, but maybe I should?

I used my real number. You can block anyone who is a problem.

pushreset I can completely get how a 2 month relationship ending could hurt. You've got to the point of starting to relax into it.....and then BAM. I think you need to spend the next few days having a good old wallow, if circumstances permit.

coolcahuna OK, so somewhere in the pile defined by my parameters (within 50 miles, age 39-49) there are 13 blokes who have swiped right on me, and I have to go through the whole pile, and hopefully some of my right swipes coincide with their right swipes?!

God, why on earth don't apps come with instructions?! Is it because cool people are just supposed to know this somehow?? I don't, because I really don't like mobile apps, and try to do everything on my laptop. Instagram is the only real app I have, and again I was forced to have it (it's useful for work) because it doesn't work fully on a laptop.

This, this! (bangs on table) is a great example of behavioural engineering! Damn you, The Man!

Anyhoo.....hopefully at some point I will rise above this and be able to join in with some nice anecdotes about potential suitors.....

stubbornstains yeah basically you need to swipe through them . You might not end up with 13 matches though as you might swipe left on some of those.

pushreset oh no, I'm so sorry. I totally get how a 2 month thing can leave you feeling like that. Did he do this on text or did you chat ?

Just met MrIce, he was very attractive but I couldn't get a word in and he talked at me alot. Not sure if it was nerves but he didn't seem that interested in me. My Fwb first date was like this and he massively calmed down after that. So I'm a bit unsure. Will see if he texts.

coolcahuna all over text... Two texts to be exact. I haven't heard a word since.... 'I know'. Haven't slept much, just don't know what to do. It's proper over isn't it.

@Pushreset I'm so sorry. It properly hurts, I know. Let yourself be sad for a few days. I think it's natural to hope he has a change of heart, but don't let that go on for too long. I'm a great believer in fate - if it's not going to work out with him, it's because there's something better waiting for you, but it's bloody heart breaking at the moment. Hugs for you lovely x

Thanks for that @JeSuisPrest. Not just a change of heart but neither one of us has said it's over if you know what I mean? I know it's between the lines though. Going to try and keep busy today and not look at my phone every 5 mins. At least I saved a bit of money on Xmas presents..... Ho hum.

Pushreset sorry to hear that. Two months is long enough for it to hurt. Especially as he hasn't really said it's over.
Do something lovely for yourself today.

@Pushreset Agree about the phone checking and keeping busy. What's the guilt and other stuff going on that he is struggling with?

@JeSuisPrest first Xmas without seeing kids on Xmas morning, guilt about moving on from ex, feeling of loosing everything, general feeling down... Gosh writing it down, I've been an idiot 😔

You haven't been an idiot, you've been normal :)

Archive the WhatsApp chat. That way if he sends you a message it pops up but it's not on your page of chats so you don't keep checking it

Be kind to yourself...