Dating Thread 139: clowns swiping left to me, jokers to the right...

[Pringlecat]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Is it vet orcover off to Canada (sorry I am terrible for mixing up names)? Good luck, I'm so excited for you.

It's me Daffo I'm here now, I got here Saturday afternoon Canada time and it's now 6am Monday morning (jet lag still in effect!). I'm just checking in quickly so sorry for the lack of a proper catch up - hi to all the newbies though.

Well, I'm here on the world's furthest and longest first date and thankfully it's utterly amazing So far it has been better than I could have hoped... I knew we had incredible chemistry on the video calls and it's even stronger in person. He's awesome and it just feels totally easy and natural but still exciting... so yeah, so far so good and we're both feeling really happy and really incredulous that this actually happened!! I'm here until next week and we've talked about what happens next, I'll update as and when we decide what to do but just wanted to give a quick summary for now! We're off to the mountains for a couple of days today so I won't be online much bit hope everyone has a good start to the week!

vet omg, it is like a dream! Have fun in the mountains, thrilled for you!

Wow Vet I have been waiting for the update. So happy for you......

Can I just ask a question to the thread.... Is anybody using something called Hinge? Is it worth it? I'm thinking of giving it a go because I am losing the will to live with Tinder.

Have an amazing time Vet.

vixen I have just started using it, seems quite quiet but I like the format. Worth a try if you have time to set up a profile. Not had anyone chat to me yet that I'd be interested in but nothing new there, same on all the apps!

Thanks cake..... I need to switch up things. I'm just not getting the right types on Tinder. Keep falling for the ones who are no good for me.......

Thinking Hinge and My Single Friend.

vixen have you used Bumble?

Hi everyone! Been lurking a while hoping I can join in. My current sitch is that i've got a few irons - went on a date last night, super nice fella but didn't fancy him. One i'm meant to meet next week but he's in the next city over so it's a bit meh.

Oh and a psychologist who I got on fabulously with over text - fancied (his pictures anyway) - who asked me out for coffee, then cancelled in the morning but made a big deal about rescheduling. I thought fair enough. Come the day of the second coffee date. He cancelled again! So, whatever - time waster. 2 weeks go by - he's back. Can he take me for a coffee to make up for cancelling. He's hilarious right? (I haven't replied but I thought about sending him a link for online coffee delivery to my office)

And that's about the size of it. I will say though, I met my partner of several years through online dating and the attitudes to meeting/keeping a date have changed radically. People just seem to be so....haphazard. Also, I don't remember ghosting being a thing which my lodger had happen to her recently quite traumatically.

Anyway - it's a novel sorry!

vet I am so pleased for you!

vixen I used hinge and it was awful for me. No one that I didn't recognise from other sites and tbh not many in my age range/location at all. I was on it a week and came off it.

wally if you want to, dm me his name x

Vet that's so exciting. Keep us updated when you can

Vixen I've tried Hinge. Great if you're in London but otherwise very few people on it. I also had technical issues with uploading photos. Customer support was quick to offer help but never solved the problem.

Dan89 I've had a few male friends look at my profile and Kin suggested a few changes. But the overall opinion is that the photos are good and the profile is interesting.
I just don't seem to be what the men round here are looking for.

Feeling the same as some others, why are people swiping if not interested in mailing back. Clearly just for an ego boost!

I had a bloke mate ex mate one tell me that it's common for men to swipe everybody and then see who matches. Laziness and/or ego boost, it seems is the answer.

I read an article recently that said on average men will swipe right on 80% of women. But women will only right swipe on about 17% of men.

Men do this partly because they get so few replies from the women on dating sites. But also it's an ego boost. Why not, when you show your mates that you have a long list of women that have matched with you.

@Supercali77 YES send him the link to get coffee delivered, what an excellent idea! Cripes, sounds like you're the subject of a psychological experiment or something.

Mr Penpal is back in frequent contact it seems I am not done with him yet. He's good for a hit of dopamine flirting-wise, and maybe he will suggest we meet. I don't honestly think he is seeing anybody else. Ah well.

What are people's opinions of bumble?

Subspace, not really a fan of bumble. I get lots of messages on pof and tinder, but on bumble (where obvs I have to message first) the men seem fairly dry conversation wise. Never had a date off it or even a phone number exchange.

It seems very much full of 20 something's artsy types where I am, which isn't really what I'd go for, as a late 20s single mum.

@fiercelikefrida thanks. Hmm. I am stuck with eharmony because I was stupid to sign straight up for a year I hate tinder with a passion and POF, well, that's where the content for my book on terrible dates will come from. Went on it about 10 years ago for a year or two and have not dared to look back on it

@fierce and @subspace I've had a few dates and lots of matches on Bumble but everyone is a bit too good looking and cool?

Subspace, I’m on Bumble as came recommended by a friend who met ‘the one’ on there but whilst I get loads of matches, barely any response back to my emails! And I think I’m 😂 funny.....had a few flirty chats but really nothing big. Feel nervous to try Tinder as always thought it was about sex....🤓

For those asking if this app is better than that app, really the only difference is how busy they are in your area. For me, pof and tinder have the most people, with okcupid and badoo practically dead. Everything else is much of a muchness in my opinion.

Well look at all of you, nice to see some old names in here and still dating away.
I am still on th smitten bench after over four months. Still pinching myself that I actually found someone so 'seemingly' amazing on POF 😦
But I have to say he hasn't put a foot wrong so far.
i finally got my decree absolute though as well 👍 It has been a slog and I never in a million years thought I'd feel so serious about someone after my the horrible way my marriage ended but...... Time will tell, if things carry on how they are then it was all worth it

oooh @lostlily, I might join pof now!

Lostlity tell us more!? How did it progress date wise? Have you had the exclusive chat?

I need positive stories! I'm not dating until the new year... Having a break, it all got too much.

Well done lost I am so pleased for you x

I'm despairing at some people's chatting ability. Someone has just asked me why I'm on Bumble.
The same reason as you I would imagine mate!