Dating Thread 139: clowns swiping left to me, jokers to the right...

[Pringlecat]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Thanks coolcahuna. I like tattoos too. He just seems like a nice guy and a bit geeky, that’s what makes him different from the usual cocky types I seem to go for. It definitely made a nice change to be out with someone who was funny and good company. He actually seemed genuinely interested in me rather than just sex or talking at me about himself.

Good for you on addressing your breadcrumber. Sometimes a push in the right direction is what people need.

Kids are back at school and POF seems to be a bit busier.
I have a few irons..

Mr VW still no date lined up, texting every day but not sure where it’s going or if I’m just a pen pal.

Mr Beard who has the most amazing beard and the most amazing eyes but he has just told me they he’s not 37 but is actually 27, now usually this would bother me but....he has an amazing beard 😂, he’s also local which is a bonus as most of my irons live a hours drive away.

Mr Tall who also has a nice beard but not as nice as Mr Beard, he’s seems a little bit odd and his photo isn’t great but he wants to meet me for a coffee (maybe next week).

I was meant to go on a date last weekend but I wasn’t feeling it, he didn’t message me to arrange a time so I didn’t bother messaging him either. Haven’t heard anything from him (no great loss).

I have a few other messages in POF but haven’t replied to them as most live too far away.

I have odd news of Mr Music and MrLovebombghoster

Date with Mr Music went so well we are seeing each other tomorrow but I STILL cannot help but think he won't turn up. I guess if he does tomorrow then I need to stop thinking of him as Mr Unreliable and a possible potential bf but still hmm...he is so backwards about coming forwards. I can't talk to him like I can MrLovebombingghoster.

MrLovebombingghoster has told me the most horrific thing happened to him last year. I know his name, have googled it and it did (it was reported on in the papers, a horrid crime thing) he is now saying the reason he behaved the way he did was that he totally freaked out when he started having feelings for me. He says he is not ready for a gf and meeting me made him realise that so all he is going to do is fwb. I think we will become friends. We are going to talk tonight and catch up. Talking to him is so easy and wonderful. I am glad he has explained himself. I can say anything to him and vice versa. Sigh. Tbh I think I wouldn't go out with him now anyway but he will be a wonderful friend.

Will see if Mr Music turns up tomorrow.

Wow. I went to log in to my old account and I couldn't. Couldn't find my profile through a name search. Tried to reset password using the link no email sent to me. Looks like I've been deleted. Apparently this can happen if someone reports you....abd I suspect Mr 'give me your identity'. Maybe I'm cynical but it's the day after I blocked him.

(I didn't block him on pof...just on my phone). I bet it was him. I've not sent a single inappropriate email or revealing pics and never had an issue like this before

It will be supercali- he will claim you're not real as you didn't reveal your name!

@DaffoDeffo what an ass-hat! Well....i set up a new one and I expect him to just do it again because as usual my instincts were right. He's a d*ck

Maybe I'm being paranoid now but someone just called my mobile on a private number and didn't speak??

Oh supercali that's not nice. Really hope that the phone call is just a coincidence.

And yes supercali77 I hope he does get back to me for a date but if he's a flake or just hedging his bets I'd rather he didn't bother I don't want anybody's breadcrumbs.
Made do too many times over the last thirty odd years of dating

@dragonflyflew thanks I'm hoping so too. Damn straight! who's got time for a trail of breadcrumbs leading nowhere. I'm gluten intolerant anyway

Right so. I received a second call with no one talking. I unblocked that guy so I could send a text to say...if this is you. Stop. I didn't get the chance because he texted me. It was him. A private number and then a landline. Apparently 2 different reasons why the calls went weird. I replied just saying ....look it's not ok to insist on a full name. It's not ok to call twice and not speak. It's all setting off alarm bells so can we just drop it. I really hope he just drops it

Daffo - MrMusic sounds promising. Hope he turns up tomorrow. What makes you think he wont? And MrLove... would you be just friends or fwb? Just curious, lol.
Love is that still the same MrVW? Or am I confusing you with someone else? If not, it's been going on a long time hasn't it?
Super - Have you asked Admin what 'rule' you've allegedly breached? Surely they can't just take one person's side. Surely as the woman you have every right to not reveal your real name!!!
I also had a call from a private number tonight - have now deleted my account on POF. Maybe just a coincidence.

Another up-date on MrWow. It's my birthday Sat and seeing as we broke up last Sat, he's arranged to go to a football re-union and was quite excited about it. Now he feels bad. I've told him to go and I'll see him Friday to celebrate my birthday instead. I was so nearly in a real strop about it but it actually feels quite good to be 'grown-up' about it, lol.
Anyway, good luck to anyone on dates this week-end. xx

Cali what a fucking weirdo. Why? Just why?! Thank fuck you never met him!
Really hope he drop it now, hopefully you can get him banned and completely block him from any way of contacting you. Hope he can be banned and not contact any other poor unsuspecting women. El creepo.

Mr Vague But Cute contacted me tonight, said he's free next weds but might be going away and will let me know for sure at the weekend... I said that works for me so far but not going to put any possible plans on hold until I get a guaranteed date.

@TooOldForThis67 no I just moved on. Apparently they rarely get back to you...i looked on the forums as to why I couldn't log in. Hope you have a great time with your Mr wow on Friday and happy birthday!

@dragonflyflew he texted a big elaborate apology but I defo think he got me banned and I've been firm about no more contact. Good stuff I hope vaguecute come a through but I'm with you there..keep the other dates rolling if you can!

Hope you don't mind me jumping on the thread. I feel I need to rant!
So I haven't been online dating for a long time and had no long term success with it. A guy I messaged way back but didn't meet randomly messages me tonight saying he wants me and feels horny.. then follows the dick pic. I feel so annoyed. I didn't want any picture and haven't had any sexual conversation with him at all. I've blocked him. why do men feel they have a right to do this? I'm lying quietly in bed after a long day and actually feel violated. I'm done with OLD

Tictactic how fucking rude!
I'm so lucky that nobody has sent me unsolicited dick pics in my life (yet!)
I don't mind a saucy pic or vid in the context of a consensual exchange/relationship but if someone sent me one that I hadn't been expecting I'd be horrified and really grossed out!
Sorry its left you feeling shitty.

supercali77 I'm glad he apologized, hope he moves on now. Imagine if you were less savvy what he might have been progressing to. Creepy.

@dragonflyflew.... I know
He asked if I ever get horny. Given this is an out of the blue message with someone I haven't met. I replied I think it's a personal question to ask a stranger and good luck, it's not what I'm looking for etc. then a sorry he's horny, then the pic. I just feel so f#@king angry! if it's unsolicited is this not as bad as flashing? I know its not in the flesh but... there should be a law against this!
consensual yes I'm fine with. But this, no thank you!

@dragonflyflew I suspect he might be a creep under the guise of the apologetic 'I'm a bumbling fool' cloak. Still...its A relief to be sorted!

@Tictactic you're right....unsolicited dick pics are an intrusion...especially the way he did it. You say no and he does it anyway. You'd think by now there'd be either preventative filters blocking that kind of content or giving you the option to reject it...or at least something to stop this kind of thing

TicTac -. I would shut that down with some sort of comment like..... "No thanks; didn't anyone ever tell you small things are a choking hazard"

Then delete and block his ass. Don't let him rattle you.

Jesus, some guys have no class!

@supercal and @vixen
It actually makes me feel sick. Yes he went ahead and sent it despite me wishing him well and nicely sending him on his way.
I replied, no thanks and immediately blocked. He's a professional man. If he did that in the street he'd be arrested. Well I guess some while back he did mention some psychological issues so perhaps he needs to learn boundaries and respect. Anyhow, I'm ok now. I was tired yesterday and it annoyed me.thanks! I'm pleased I don't feel alone in this. Is this really the norm these days? I'm in my 40's

haha vixen I wish I could think of come backs like that... I am always so slow even with time to think about it. I have no idea why guys think that this is even acceptable.

I have been lurking to just keep up with everyone but I am still dating my OLD guy and it has been 8 months now. We had the little Tinder wobble a couple of months ago but since our chat after this we are more open with how we feel and things seem to be going very well. I have been having some work done to my house so bascially moved in to his last week for a while. My anxiety has improved so much too. This time last year I was having panic attacks daily but now im in such a more positive mind space generally.

tictactic I'm in my 40s too and I don't think it's normal. I got sent a dick pic this morning by the bloke who has been chatting to me but he asked first and waited for me to answer. I have absolutely no interest in him whatsoever. I think he is actually a sex addict but he's quite amusing. We will never go out, in fact, we will never meet each other most likely. His is the first one I've been sent! He also has a very very big job (along with his very big nob). Amazing that the trust is there that I wouldn't do anything with it. I wouldn't, but still...

spoke to MrLovebomber last night for hours again - it is so easy. Tooold he will become a fwb I suspect. If we lived closer, we would have done it last night lol. He said I asked you 5 times to come over (he did) but you didn't (I didn't). I am not sure I want to go there with him. I will have a think about it. He is still actively dating others so we both know we won't have a relationship now. I think we know we are safe with each other and the sex is goooood.

tooold mr music has form for not turning up. He is mr unreliability. On the day we meet up, he goes very quiet. I alternate between thinking he's shy and terrified and thinking he's just a twat. But we have so much fun when we do finally meet up that I'm tolerating it for now.

no other irons in the fire but did match with someone quite nice on bumble this morning - just need to remember to message before tomorrow

super did you find out why you were blocked

tooold happy birthday for the weekend and well done for being a grown up ;)