Confidence level down after comments on body

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Hi all,

Really needs advice on BF behaviour

So, my BF and I are 25 and 24 years old, and we have been together for 4 years. This weekend we went to Monaco to celebrate our 4th year anniversary. Everything went really well, and I really felt like we had shared a beautiful and romantic moment together. We came back last night, he tells me how much he was happy to be with me etc etc

Today I saw a message he received from one of his best friend (who is currently in Italy on the beach with his GF) saying: "I realized I have reached the bottom 2.5% in terms of ass and boobs with my GF as I look at other girls on the beach " (this is translated from French, the actual language employed was very rude and vulgar, just did not know how to translate it. My BF responded, "Yeah, please don't remind me that I am part of the bottom 2.5% too. Girls were just so hot in the south of France. and then he adds a smiley crying" - This is not the first time this type of comments are arising, we went on vacation with 12 other friends in July and he told me I was the least good looking of the girls in the house we were renting. Sometimes he makes comments at dinner in front of everyone: "Oh think a bit about your ass stop eating all that"

I am not sure if that matters, but I actually felt really great about my body before. AT University I was elected Queen of the Business ball and I was always complimented on my look, my hair, my body...I believe I still look great, but I am really losing my confidence when I see this kind of messages or hear his comments
I don't know how to react, Is it normal for him to expect that I hit the gym everyday to look more like his standard (going to the gym is healthy after all)? Should I talk to his friend? should I talk to the other girl being body shamed? Should I just keep it to myself? Technically I found out about the message while spying on his FB profile... so not great on my side

Most importantly, I am very worried about the future. If he makes this kind of comments now that I am young, what will he do when I get older, become pregnant or gain weight? Anyone with experiences on this matter?
Should I stop speaking to him? I just don't know how to react
This should not affect me that much, I don't want to be superficial, but it really makes me sad especially when I thought we 've had actually spend a very nice weekend in the south of France..

Why would you change him? Why would you want to change someone like that? He is an idiot who looks at other women and rates them out of 10, including you.

My DH would never, ever dream of commenting on my body like that as I'm sure 90% of the posters on this threads OH wouldn't either! It is not okay, it is not "banter".

Leave him please OP. He is making you feel like fucking shit for his own amusement. One day you will find a MAN, not a boy like this clown, that will treat you like the woman you deserve. And your only regret will be that you didn't leave this prick earlier. You will never be fully happy with this man. You will never feel good enough for him and you will never feel attractive. Leave him for your own good.

If someone loves you, they think you're beautiful if you're 8st or 20st. He loves himself, not you. Dump his sorry arse, you can do better than him.

If someone loves you, they think you're beautiful if you're 8st or 20st.

I agree that this should be true but often isn't.

How are doing OP? Is everything okay?

I want to swear. In fact I will. Fucking hell he's an arsehole OP.

Please don't put up with this revolting behaviour. Give him the gift of your absence, the nasty little inadequate.

If someone loves you, they think you're beautiful if you're 8st or 20st.

I don't think this is necessarily true, although they will still love you if you're 20 stone. And since they love you, they won't try to make you feel ugly and say disgusting things about you to other people.

I’m mid forties and have had four children.
DH still regularly tells me I’m the best looking woman in the room etc. We were a little younger than you when we met and he insisted to all his friends that I was much better looking than Liv Tyler
(I’m really not )

Don’t give this horrible man a moment more of your time or energy.
I like a PPs suggestion of a WhatsApp group to let the other girlfriend know too.
These men are vile and don’t deserve girlfriends.

Talking derogatory about you is the start of controlling you, making you feel bad about yourself and ultimately making you think you’re so lucky to have him that you will put up with anything . See the light and run as far from him as you can. Y

If someone loves you, they think you're beautiful if you're 8st or 20st

I don't buy that. When I see 20st people I see obesity, poor health, not love.
I don't think I'd fancy my OH if they ballooned to 20st. I may lovr them, but they wouldn't be beautiful in my eyes. I'd think of them as rather grotesque

He sounds really horrible. You deserve better than this don’t you? What do you see in him? There’s no way that you should waste your time being casually degraded by the person who you are partnered with. Some partner! With someone like that bringing you down, belittling and judging you, who needs enemies?

What an arsehole!!

Good luck. Xx

How are you OP?