Oh fuck. I think I’ve just found an affair phone

[FuckyDuzz]

Well it’s not really an ‘I think’ really, I just have

There was an unfamiliar beeping coming from the coat/shoe cupboard so I went in to investigate and found a phone in DPs coat, a cheap little Nokia with just one contact - a woman’s name

I am home alone with 4 kids trying not to cry but honestly I could throw up right now
Wtf

Hope you and the kids are okay

Just want to thank you all so much for the thoughts and support, I’ve never seen so many flowers on one thread

I can’t tell you all how much I appreciate you taking the time to post, I really don’t want to make it real and tell anyone in real life so it’s nice not to feel alone
I already feel a weird heavy lonely feeling (if that makes sense) knowing that he’s not on my team anymore and I am getting so much comfort from you all cheering me on

He’s gone out now, he didn’t look for the phone so maybe he actually is where he said he is tonight 🤷🏻‍♀️

Both of the babies are asleep so me and the older two are about to pop some popcorn and watch a film (I may also have wine)
Whoever said upthread that I don’t sound like I want to believe it or do anything is right tbh, someone else said that once I confront him there’s no going back and tbh that thought is utterly terrifying to me atm, I’m not ready to drop that bomb in the middle of my family today
So for now I’ll just eat my popcorn, watch Matilda and hug my babies

& for all of you, you are all so lovely

Please please don’t let this slip. Don’t confront him if you are scared to do so though! Just fake it and be sneaky if you have to be. Just do as PP have said change the number to yours and wait it out !

Good for you OP. They say to leave when you're strong. I guess that goes for dropping bombs too. You take all the time you need. The strength will come.

Glad you're feeling a bit better OP. For now, just enjoy the film, the wine and your children xx

Hug your babies but keep your money safe! Sort that asap. Thinking of you.

Just saw your most recent post and I completely understand that OP. You’ve been out in a horrible situation through no fault of your own and it’s up to you how you react today, tomorrow, next week. If there’s anything specific you want advice with just say

Oh fuzzy, completely understandable. You take your time and work out a plan.
I wouldn't change the number and try to be normal until you decide what to do.

Whatever happens, you will not be dropping any bombs. This is all on him

None of this is your fault x

You're showing fantastic strength to be able to sit on it until the time is right for you. 👏

Not read the full thread yet but it could be a "punting phone" OP. Sorry, with address and 20minutes etc and by the sounds of the short visits that is possibly what it is.

WTF is a "punting phone"?

What a strong woman you are!
Have you put phone back? I would turn it off and hide it. Watch him stress when he can't find it!

Leaving it is absolutely fine op

I did the same thing on almost identical circumstances.... I left when I was ready

Sending kind thoughts to you and your children

Oh Fucky, shit always happens to good people! Have got similar t-shirt but 7yrs down the line, whilst it's not always a bed of roses I can safely say I am 100% better off than I was when we were together. So yes, eat popcorn, enjoy the closeness with your DC and know that you can, and will, get through whatever the future brings

I wanted to ask that too @SpaceDinosaur

Sending you some more OP. Hope all works out fine for you and the wee ones.

A punting phone is a phone used to contact prostitutes.

@SpaceDinosaur a punting phone is a cheap pay as you go phone that men will buy who are habitual punters i.e they visit prostitutes.

If you look at the site UKpunting it is the no.1 tip they offer men, always get a punting phone, that way nothing comes to your personal phone.

OP if you put it in whatsapp no doubt she will pop up as most prossies these days tend to use Whatsapp to communicate with their clients.

Oh OP, I'm so fucking sorry. I've been exactly where you are and I know how devastating it feels, but I PROMISE you, it does get better with time and you will come out the other side ok. for you my love

So sorry to read this. As some others have said, sort out the money stuff ASAP, but take the time you need to work out what you want to do. It must be such a lot to take in right now. Enjoy the cuddles, film and wine tonight, take a breath and take care of yourself. Thinking of you

Just read through the thread, and I'm so so sorry OP sounds like an absolute nightmare. Hope you are feeling ok and like others have said, don't worry about rushing to post on here just know that everyone is sending love and support is here when you need it

Nobody has any idea who he's been seeing. There's nothing to suggest he's visiting prostitutes.

Really sorry you’re having to deal with this OP but bloody hell can we remember this is someone’s life we’re talking about, some of the speculating and obvious place marking is a bit much imo

I'd be tempted to lock the door behind him and leave the key in?... and leave the phone in a Full pint glass of water on the doorstep (if he left it home). Message is clear! (I would add more flowers but I haven't figured out how on my phone!... enjoy popcorn!)