Oh fuck. I think I’ve just found an affair phone

[FuckyDuzz]

Well it’s not really an ‘I think’ really, I just have

There was an unfamiliar beeping coming from the coat/shoe cupboard so I went in to investigate and found a phone in DPs coat, a cheap little Nokia with just one contact - a woman’s name

I am home alone with 4 kids trying not to cry but honestly I could throw up right now
Wtf

Ok lovely , if you want to know ‘where’ he is going to, and aren’t going to confront immediately go to ‘locate my phone’ set it up with the number of the Nokia, (it’s about£2 for 10 credits, The Nokia phone will then get a verification text, add in the verification number then delete that text immediately, now go to the account and press check on cell tower, it will tell you roughly on google maps where that phone is (which should be somewhere near your house) it will then send a text through to say ‘you have been located’ or something similar, go in and ‘block’ that number that it came from. After that you can go in and check up and he won’t get a text when you check , desperate shit like this requires knowledge at your fingertips

Good luck fucky.

I'm so sorry OP. I know it's not much, but we're all here to support you.

All of these replies 🙌🏼*
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Not sure if you'll read this but if you do confront him at her house (if you haven't already dropped him on his arse), if you can, take a friend or trusted family member for moral support- support in numbers.

I was in a similar type of situation but not married or living together, I took a friend and she sat in the car. It helped me massively just knowing she was there.

Good luck OP & hold your own

I'd just be direct. Show him the phone. Ask him to explain himself. Now.

@FuckyDuzz say goodbye have a nice evening, put his stuff on the front door step, change the locks, instruct solicitor. Set up an email account for all future correspondence with him regarding the children. Contact the cms regarding maintenance. Drink all the wine.

It’s seems like you are going to be awesome as your mum

Thinking of you. fuck, and hope you are putting on your Oscar winning performance.

Thinking of you OP. Stay strong

God op I hope ur ok

I think you should change your bank passwords and cancel his credit card ( if he is second card holder on your account) before you confront him. You can do both these things immediately.
Since the house is yours, you can change the locks while he is out, if you are so inclined.
Don't waste time worrying about who she is - it doesn't matter. You know enough.
How big are your debts? I'd get every penny I could from him before chucking him out.

Good luck OP

@yetmorecrap amazing!

Good luck.

Just a thought,,could you phone him on his normal,no,tonight, ‘to get some milk, bread, nappies’ and see if you can tell where he actually is, from background noise. Also, it will be telling if he goes,to,the coat/shoe cupboard before he goes. Maybe you could play devils advocate and offer to,get him his shoes for,him before he goes, and see what his reaction will,be.

I would hide it. He can't ask you where it is, obviously, so he'll go crazy looking for it. Then I would just slyly ask him if he needed any help looking for whatever he'd lost.

I wouldn't ask him about it yet as he'll lie. I'd wait for a bit.

Good luck Fucky. What a prize bastard! Glad your finances are sorted

Wishing you strength, op. Thank goodness your mother instilled some bloody good precautions into you - though sadly from her awful experience.
A truly terrible situation to be going through - what a sad bastard he is - these men don't know a good thing when they see it. Losing everything for a thrill - sad bastards.

Fuck this game playing.
Fuck this sex worker shaming (police, really?)

OP I am so so sorry you are in these shoes. I really hope you manage to keep it together

Mmm.
No games.
Cancel account access, any other opportunities he may have to get at your money/assets.
You have the upper hand now. And the moral high ground. Stay on it, no games, as much dignity as you can muster.
Get those locks changed ASAP after he’s off. This is your kingdom and he can fuck off out of it now.
Strength to you OP. You are walking through hell... you’ve had an appalling shock... you can do this.

I bet your bottom dollar he say's it's a mate's phone, he's just holding it for them for insertreasonhere. Good luck op :(

Leave the phone where it is. You know the hiding place now.

All the best this evening. Even if you are not feeling confident, fake it witj what ever way you're going to act this evening.
Always remember you deserve honesty, even just messaging someone behind your back is a betrayal

Good luck

Good luck OP