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Original poster

How do you feel about lap dance club/pole dancing stuff.........?

318 replies

niceglasses · 23/05/2007 07:41

My dh works in a bit of a boyish industry - mobile phones - tends to be bit 'scummy'.

I'd say ohhhh 5 or 6 times now on a night out they have ended up at these lap dance/topless places. At least he doens't lie about it! He says they just want the extra drink. He doesn't get home till about 4/5 in the morning.

I have gently let it be known I don't like it - he says its harmless.

What do you wise lot think? I don't feel like I can 'ban' him but I do feel a bit put out.

OP posts:
ipanemagirl · 23/05/2007 15:10

For everyone who has had a good experience in the sex industries then bravo you. Necessity is the Mother of Needs Must etc. But politically, honestly, don't you think the ideal would be for women to not be used as sexual objects.
No one is talking about page three and the messages that sends to society, no one is talking about the huge costs of european sex trade. These things are not entirely unrelated. Who are the millions of uk men who use prostitutes? Do you think the sex trades are all distinct and unconnected?

PregnantGrrrl · 23/05/2007 15:10

it wasn't me was it expat?! (actually, i only have one right now) I look rough as arse ATM. Blardy pregnancy bloom not set in yet!

PinkTulips · 23/05/2007 15:11

pmsl expat, i knew you'd be jumped on the second i read that

expatinscotland · 23/05/2007 15:11

Exactly, NP.

So why call them whores, slappers, slags, etc.?

Honestly.

skidaddle · 23/05/2007 15:11

expat I think your post is AS BAD, not worse as calling strippers whores etc - they are both really horrible things to say

nailpolish · 23/05/2007 15:11

oh and pinkT

respect! when i waitressed i often wished i was a girl poledancing but didnt have to balls (so to speak)

expatinscotland · 23/05/2007 15:12

No, PG, it wasn't you.

Of course, this entire thread will be about that last line of that post I'm sure.

Because tbh I've seen a lot of envy disguised as self-righteousness on here lately.

And that's how I see it. That's my opinion.

ipanemagirl · 23/05/2007 15:12

envy?! we don't deserve the vote!

expatinscotland · 23/05/2007 15:12

Fine with me, skid.

It was how I felt. A reaction. People have them all the time.

But lately on here, that's not very PC.

Pan · 23/05/2007 15:12

expat - it was calling her an 'it', and alluding to her kids as well..not slagging you off per se, or lap dancing...never been to one..no wish to go..have been happily received such things from x-p(s)..the public bit is not to my taste, but not judging any women who chooses to do it.

PinkTulips · 23/05/2007 15:13

no, i see no harm at all in women using the looks nature gave them to earn ridiculous amounts of money

do you really think we're being exploited?

IMO the poor saps who wander in the door and are fleeced of every last penny to feeel akward and embarressed are the exploited ones.

PregnantGrrrl · 23/05/2007 15:13

ipanemagirl- do you not think it possible that there are savvy women out there, permitting the illusion that the men are in power, while they line their pockets? I don't doubt that there are miserable sex workers out there, but there are also plenty of business minded ones who command respect with distinct boundaries.

i see sex work like any other business, some people do well, some don't, some are happy, some aren't.

Original poster
niceglasses · 23/05/2007 15:13

I do trust dp. I did say it was more of a grumbly grumble than a mad 'you can not go or I will leave'. I think I am slighlty peeved Madamez because of a mixture, but mostly,worry the girls are explioted (seems not from on here)and that he is party to this 'raunch culture' but thats a wider issue than dp going to these places and like a lot have said, if there was a half decent joint for drink, I don't think he would.

Affair with a poledancer??? Maybe. Would she take the bleedin' screaming 3 kids with her I wonder??

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 23/05/2007 15:14

Where are you getting the juxtaposition between voting and lap dancing?

Honestly, what are people on here smoking these days?

10,000 threads about how nippy and PC-baiting it's become, and I laughed at them all.

Till now.

Some people need to chill out. Why not head over to a lap dancing club for a drink?

They let women in, you know .

PinkTulips · 23/05/2007 15:14

NP.. i started as a bargirl and got soo peed off with the dancers tipping me more than i earned all night i switched

LostPuppy · 23/05/2007 15:15

Off topic, you know sometimes being dyslexic can bring amusement, as I thought pink tulips was called two pink lips!

It reminded me of the joke, what's better than a rose on your piano?

Tulips on your organ

expatinscotland · 23/05/2007 15:15

I'd have stripped had my husband been cool with it, PT.

skidaddle · 23/05/2007 15:16

pink tulips, I'm glad your experience was positive and you didn't feel exploited but to say sex workers are not exploited is to me absolute madness - strippers less so than prostitutes but the business in general is exploitative. Do you not remember the famous statistic about 95% of prostitutes are drug addicts?

PregnantGrrrl · 23/05/2007 15:16

and i'd have loved to have had a go at pole dancing pre-bubba, but sadly i'm too clumsy to manage a pole! I did dance on stage with a band once when i was a teenager- it was the most exhilerating (sp) and exciting thing i'd ever done. it wasn't for cash, but they did offer me a spot touring with them. Didn't go though...blardy University

ipanemagirl · 23/05/2007 15:17

Of course I have no problem with the women who are in control and I admire their savvyness.

But it's part of a bigger picture in my opinion. I don't know how we can bring boys and girls up to respect each other as people if the only message they get is that a girl must be pretty and sexy more than anything else. How else can we explain the explosion in anorexia? Do people think that's a good thing?

nailpolish · 23/05/2007 15:17

there is a huge difference between lapdancers and hookers

HUGE

Pan · 23/05/2007 15:18

I have lap-danced as well.For ex-p(s)...went down very well, I 'll have you know.(smile).

do other chaps do this for their partners....???

expatinscotland · 23/05/2007 15:18

Is the old saying, 'Strippers never hook and hookers never strip' true, though?

PinkTulips · 23/05/2007 15:19

true, i've given dances to plenty of women and they enjoyed it far more than the men

the people who are talking about how exploititive it is and ho it keeps women down. do you realise how insulting you're being to the women who do these jobs? do you credit us with so little intelligance that we are unable to see the error of our ways and need to be protected less our ignorance bring us to harm?

i'm made a well informed decision to follow that line of work and was comfortable with my decision. i'm not stupid or uneducated and i resent the implication that to do any job that involved being proud of my body i must be a bit dim

ipanemagirl · 23/05/2007 15:19

expat, when we educate women well they don't have to work as strippers. When women have the vote they have more choices. Education, rights, opportunities: these things are connected imo.